Rhythms: IN (Developing a Love First Mentality)

Watchmen Nee wrote that his mentor, Margaret Barber, cared more about life than work. She focused on loving the people God brought her way rather than the work she needed to get done.

What a beautiful focus. This is my desire as well, but too often loving people gets lost behind the pressure to get things done.

Story

A while ago, I needed to get the name of diabetic test strips which would be covered under our new insurance plan. My pharmacy told me to call my doctor. My doctor told me to call my insurance company. My insurance company referred me to a third party, which handled pharmacy issues.

After navigating a labyrinth of computer generated voices, I finally spoke to a person. His name was John. His voice was slow and shaky. I had the call on speaker and my wife and I could tell John was elderly.

John didn’t know the answer to my question and suggested I call my pharmacy. When I told him I had,  he suggested I call my insurance company. I tried to calmly explain that my insurance company was who told me to call him.

By this point, I had no compassion for John. I really just wanted to mark this nagging to-do off my list. I didn’t care what John might have been going through.  I’d lost sight of any opportunity to love him. 

I did not have a love first mentality.

John put me on hold so he could try and get an answer. While we waited, my wife helped me see the situation differently. She could tell he was having a difficult time.  She felt bad for him.

When John got back on the line, he had an answer. As he explained it, my wife made a signal for me to pray with him. This wasn’t on my radar, but when he was done, I said, “John, is there anything I can pray for you about?”

“Yes,” John answered quickly.

Then there was a silence.

“What can I pray for you about?” I repeated.

“My salvation,” John cried out.

Wow.

I prayed with John right there on the phone, though I’m sure the call was being monitored. I prayed he would recognize God’s tremendous love for him. I let him know God was willing to allow His Son, Jesus, to die in his place to rescue him and give him salvation.

When I finished and said goodbye, we could hear what seemed to be sobs from John before we hung up.

What a wonderful interaction. But I almost  missed it. I was so focused on getting things done, loving John had dropped from any consideration. I’d lost sight of the most important thing.

The Great Command

Jesus, on the night before his crucifixion, gave his disciples a single great command. He told them that as they followed this one thing, they would stay connected to his love and their joy would be made complete.[1]

“This is my commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you.” John 15:12

Earlier in the evening, in John 13, Jesus had washed their stinky, dirty feet. The next day, He would endure a cruel death on a cross to save them. This is how He’d loved them. This is how He’s loved us.

Jesus’ new command to them, and to us, is to love others in the same sacrificial way He’s loved us.

It’s not the work. It’s the people. The things we do are not an end but a means to bring us to the people God wants us to love.

As we yield to God’s Indwelling Spirit, He will accomplish the work He wants done through us. But the Lord wants our focus to be on loving.

But what about everything else?

Having a love first mentality is absolutely what I’ve been called to do, but how do I keep my duties from becoming my primary focus, especially when to-dos mount and time is crunched?

I’m learning that, in God’s greater plan, tasks and even the problems I face, can be aids to my loving, not deterrents. It all depends on my overall intensions. Am I doing to love or just plan doing?

Looking back at my conversation with John, I was frustrated even before I talked to him. I felt like I was getting the runaround trying to get a simple answer. Finding the right test strips was one of many nagging to-dos on my every growing task list. 

I ask myself what could have made a difference and given me a love first mentality with John?

  • Trusting God that His love for me has nothing to do with me completing my task list, but is based purely on what Christ has done.
  • Remembering that Christ’s new command, to love others as He’s loved me, should supersede all other concerns.
  • Seeing duties and problems, not as purely negative, but as ways to bring me people like John to love.
  • Yielding to the Holy Spirit within as my source of patience, kindness, gentleness and love.
  • Trusting God with every task and problem, realizing they are not surprises to Him.

Conclusion

God has created a path of love. Trusting everything else to Him and His higher ways, He’s calling us to love as our primary focus.

When we do, our duties stop being the end goal and become a means to a greater purpose.

And, as we see in John 15:9-12, loving others as Christ has loved us. keeps us in the flow of His love and gives us His full and complete joy.

This sounds too good to be true, but God says it is.

Prayer

 Most gracious, heavenly Father. I’m sorry I so easily get caught up in the swirl of duties that I lose focus on loving. I see You all around me in Your creation and in the people You bring my way. Please help me trust You that the work will get done. Please change the paradigm of my day to care less about accomplishments and more about loving every person You bring my way.

Personal Study

Highlight John 13

Explain it in your own words

Apply it to your life

Respond to God in prayer 

[1] John 15:9-12

Previous posts in the Rhythms series:

God’s Amazing Love

God’s Essential Love

What Hides God’s Love

Christ Lives in Me

Raised up with Christ

Who’s your Treasure?

Obtaining the Joy of Jesus 

Orienting Life from Above

When Things Get Hard

Communing with God

Receiving God’s Love to Give it Away

.Please Check out the new Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child with the gospel.

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

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 Novels by the Author:

Rob Buck

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By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

 

2 thoughts on “Rhythms: IN (Developing a Love First Mentality)”

  1. It’s a great story, the kind of story that to often ends
    with a altogether different ending as you said.
    Our carnal nature to often draws us away from our
    primary mission “to be used of the Lord to reach that
    broken heart”.. So glad this story ended as was the
    Lord’s wish…
    We don’t want Him to say to us as He said to the Scribes and Pharisees,, (paraphrased) “you have done this and that, but have omitted the weighter matters..”
    Blessings,, Curt

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