Our Affections Affect Us (Whether We Realize it or Not)

Jimmy

Jimmy looked at his watch again as he anxiously waited outside the director’s office. In a few moments he would find out who was going to be the manager of the new IT department. Did he get the job or did Kevin?  Becoming a manager was real important to him, not only because it would make him feel successful, but he desperately needed the extra money.  He’d maxed out his credit cards due to unexpected repairs and unwise financial choices.

“I’m sorry, Jimmy,” his director said. “We believe Kevin has demonstrated what we need for this position. Keep working hard and you can apply for future opportunities.”

The news crushed  Jimmy. His anger quickly escalated. “I think you’re making a mistake,” he barked. “Kevin….

Jimmy went on to untruly attack Kevin’s character, putting into jeopardy his own hope for future promotions.

Jimmy’s affection to appear successful and to have more money influenced him into making very poor choices.

Our English word ‘affection’ is derived from the Latin ‘afficere’, which means to influence. The definition of ‘affection’ is a fond feeling, a liking or caring about someone or something.

What We Value, Strongly Affects Our Choices

Take a look around you? Check your heart. What do you care about? Is it possessions, achievements, happiness, relationships? Chances are there’s a mixture.

We care about people, so we choose to be kind.

We want to be successful, so we work diligently.

We favor order over kayos, so we choose to maintain our possessions and to take care of important responsibilities.

These are positive examples, but like Jimmy, we can harm ourselves and others by valuing something too much.

Personally, I’ve cared way too much for smooth circumstances over the years. Looking back, I see how this affection, adversely affected my life and those around me. I sometimes choose to move quickly through difficult trials, denying their gravity. I wanted to get back to feeling ‘okay’.  However, what I didn’t realize was how this quick dismissal of hard circumstances left emotional pain unattended, both in me and in others.

One true Affection will Always Affect Our Lives in Positive Ways. 

What I’m realizing is that there is one true affection which will always affects our lives in positive ways. It can become the great filter for everything which passes through our lives.

Jesus told Martha that her sister, Mary, had chosen the one thing which was necessary.[1]

In Psalm 27, David asked one thing as a life’s request:  to dwell close to God, to behold his beauty and feast upon his nearness.[2]

One Thing – Loving and worshipping God.

Jesus confirmed this longing when he said,  “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment.”  Matthew 22:37-38

In telling us this, Jesus gave us a primary affection to govern all lesser affections.

One Great, Primary Affection

Loving God with all our heart.

Our love for God begins deep within, from our hearts, ‘the spring of our life.’[3]  But any love we have for God must stem from His love for us. We love because he first love.[4]

Loving God with all our soul.

Our soul – our mind, will, and emotions. Our thoughts and feelings can deceive us. God’s great love for us can be hidden. We must choose the truth of what God says about us, over and above our feelings and our thoughts.

Loving God with all our might.

Loving God with all our might means more than just loving him with all  our strength. It means loving him with all we have at our disposal – “with everything we have available for honoring God — which includes our spouse, our children, our house or dorm room, our pets and wardrobe and tools and cell phones and movies and music and computers and time.” [5]

Loving God Overflows into What We Do

When Jesus added, “And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets,[6] we see the first influence of our affection for God.

If we love God, we will love people. And if we love people, all  lesser affections will play out in loving ways.

Kevin

Kevin heard about Jimmy’s outburst in the director’s office. He felt really hurt. He considered Jimmy a friend.

Kevin crafted an e-mail to Jimmy defending himself and telling him how hurtful his words were. He read through it and changed it several times. However, he didn’t send it.

Kevin was trying to live his live through the filter of his affection for the Lord Jesus Christ. He wanted every word and action to reflect his love for God and his love for the people in his life.

He choose to not be offended by what Jimmy had done. He agonized with God about how hurt he was.

Later, Kevin was able to see Jimmy’s pain in not getting the job. He asked God to show him what loving Jimmy would look like.

Prayer:  Lord, thank you for clearly giving us a great affection which influences every part of our lives. Like Kevin, teach us to allow our choices to flow out of our love for you.

Please help us know your love for us. Destroy anything that blocks it. May we walk around completed surrendered to your extravagant love.

Please teach us how to love you with all our hearts, all our souls and all our might.

Amen.

[1] Luke 10:41-42

[2] Psalm 27:4

[3] Proverbs 4:23

[4] I John 4:19

[5] Loving God with Your Everything  by Jason DeRouchie,  www.desiringgod.org/articles/love-god-with-your-everything

[6] Matthew 22:40

Fighting Discouragement

Been fighting discouragement all day, a general oppressive mood. I’m a IT instructor, so I can’t check my mind at the door and fully deal with how I’m feeling, I have to keep going. However, I’m learning to acknowledge my feelings and not just stuff them. This process is new for me and I’m not always sure how to proceed. However, it’s adding richness to my life and helping me understand who I really am.

Digging deeper, I recognize my disheartened mood stems from sadness. People I love are  hurting. Their pain grieves me.

“Lord, is there anything I can do?”

I feel helpless to help.

The day moves on. No one knows my sadness. Outwardly, I lay out the material and field the questions. I care about my students. So, this keeps me engaged.

The day comes to an end. On the drive home,  I begin to tend to my feelings. I realize this discouragement is an attack upon my heart, the well spring of my life.

I remember the French word for heart is “cour,” yielding our word “courage”. This dis-couragement I’m feeling threatens my courage.

I decide to preach good news to myself:

These present circumstances are not worthy to be compared to the glories which await me in Christ Jesus.[1]

Jesus loves me as much as God the Father loves Him.[2]

My Lord is  God of all comfort, who sooths my heart with His nearness.[3]

Jesus Christ indwells me by His Holy Spirit.  Mine is to depend upon Him for every word and deed. [4]

In spite of these circumstances, I can experience full joy in God’s presence.[5]

This sadness can be considered a good thing, if it draws me into deeper dependence upon Christ. [6]

Bringing these feelings to God, and trusting Him in them, purifies my soul and leads to joy unspeakable and full of glory.[7]

I died and Christ is now my life. My affections are on Him and His desires.   [8]

My goodness is not dependent on how things are going or how I feel. God’s nearness is my good.[9]

Truth stirs my heart. Courage wells up. God’s life within begins to relieve my pain.

Prayer:  Wow.   Lord, you are transforming my heart by the sweetness of your truth. Your words are honey to my soul. My circumstances have not changed, but you have given me renewed vigor. You have filled my soul with gladness, more than when their grain and new wine abound. I praise you my Father, my King.

 

[1] Romans 8:18

[2] John 15:9

[3] 2 Corinthians 1:3-5

[4] Galatians 2:20

[5] Psalm 16:11

[6] James 1:2-4

[7] I Peter 1:6-9

[8] Colossians 3:1-4

[9] Psalm 73:28