Tag Archives: discouragement

Rejoicing in Life's Moments, Replenish

(The Everlasting Way) Recovering

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Basking in the beginning of a new year. It is chilly outside, but we are cozy inside. It’s so quiet. 😊

Jack, our two-year-old Aussie, is constantly making sure we’re okay. He’s been spending a lot of time checking on my bride lately as she is recovering from shingles and life-threatening clot removal surgery.

Today I want to take some time to align my insides with what’s happened externally. I don’t always take the time to do this.

Emotions from multiple difficulties tend to stack up in my soul and grow stale, numbing my tenderness. But today I need to steward my heart. It’s part of our recovery.

A Little Entomology

Re-covery – The word recover comes from Latin recuperare (“to get again, regain”), via Old French recovrer, meaning to return to a former state, health, or possession. [1]

I love ‘re’ words. There are several that work well as I unpack my heart.

• Reflect — to bend your attention back toward truth

• Replenish — to fill again what has been poured out

• Rejoice — to delight deeply, to let joy rise anew

Reflect

Reflect, to bend my mind back toward the truth.

 The truth is that my wife could have been blinded by a severe case of shingles. She could have had a stroke or lost her life with the blood clots in her leg and lungs.

Allowing these facts to pass the stubborn ‘No Entrance’ gate of my inner heart, I cry: “I could have easily lost by bride of forty-four years!”

The reality of these recent happenings is taking root deep within me. My eyes tear up.

Tears are rare for me, and I don’t hold back. My soul shakes a bit to go along with the tear, and soft sobs emerge.

With my eyes closed, I feel a gentle pressure on my arm.

My eyes open to find Jack’s paw on my arm, checking on me. Australian Shepherds are that way. I can learn a lot from him.

Replenish

re – (again) + plenus (full) to fill up again, to restore fullness

My tears don’t last long, and they never erupt into anything more than gentle sobs, but I’m glad for them.

I turn my thoughts to the word replenish.

During a crisis, you can’t easily tell how your soul becomes drained. But I could tell I was getting discouraged. It can be disheartening when someone you love is suffering and there’s not much you can do to ease their pain.

I felt this before during the deaths of my father, mother and sister. Seeing them suffer, I did what I could, but their pain remained.

In our present situation, many folks have rallied around us.

On the first day of the emergency, even before we knew how serious the situation was, Dean, Kevin, James, and Dave showed up at the first hospital.

On the day of the surgery, our kids came from all over the place; our brother Bill flew down. Elder Rob was with us in the waiting room.

The Andes, Anna, the Millers, the Hills, James, Kelsey and Becky brought food, and many others offered. Our kids cleaned up our house and even put clean sheets on our bed. Folks from our church, our neighborhood and long-term friends were constantly praying for us, checking in and offering help.

The presence of love replenishes. It was happening during the crisis, and it’s happening now.

And now, as I pause and draw near to God, though He never leaves me, His nearness, His comfort is replenishing me. My soul is being brought back to fullness. 😎

Rejoice

re–(intensive) + gaudere (to delight)–to delight deeply, to experience joy again

Being brought again to fullness in His presence, my soul senses joy.

In Your right hand there are pleasures forever (Psalm 16:11b NASB)

He is joy. All the “little joys” of this temporal place never satisfy us. Only God gives full joy.

But how can suffering and joy co-exist? The following answers to this question are not exhaustive.

Paul: For we don’t desire to have you uninformed, brothers, concerning our affliction which happened to us in Asia: that we were weighed down exceedingly, beyond our power, so much that we despaired even of life. 9 Yes, we ourselves have had the sentence of death within ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves, but in God who raises the dead (II Corinthians 1:8-9).

When our hard times stretch us beyond our abilities, it helps us realize our limitations. We can give up or we can trust in God.

James: Count it all joy, my brothers, when you fall into various temptations, 3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. 4 Let endurance have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing (James 1:2-4).

Testing builds our endurance and perseverance, teaching us not to depend on circumstances to be okay. In Christ, we lack nothing.

Peter: In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved in various trials, 7 that the proof of your faith, which is more precious than gold that perishes, even though it is tested by fire, may be found to result in praise, glory, and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ — 8 whom, not having known, you love. In him, though now you don’t see him, yet believing, you rejoice greatly with joy that is unspeakable and full of glory, 9 receiving the result of your faith, the salvation of your souls (I Peter 1:6-9).

Trials purify and strengthen our faith.

Prayer

Lord, thank You so much for never leaving our sides during these difficulties. Thank You for allowing me to come to the end of me quickly when it comes to nursing my wife. This is allowing me to stop striving in my strength and more quickly depend on You. I should depend upon You always, no matter what.

I desperately need You. Even when I don’t realize it.

Thank You for providing new ways to show love to my wife.

Lord, thank You for these moments today to steward my heart. Thank You for being my God of all Comfort who is always by my side. Thank You for some tears. May others flow.

I love You

Reflections

In the days since, my bride’s asthma has flared up.

Honestly, this is not what I was expecting. In my sometimes-overoptimistic way, I was sure that after tooth problems, shingles and life-threatening clot removal surgery, health would surely be coming.

She’s had her weary moments, but overall, she’s kept a brave, persevering attitude.

I’m still very hopeful that things will turn around soon. But in the meantime, I’m reminded constantly of how needy I am of God’s strength and power. I must stay alert about this.

Allowing her to express to me what’s going on with her is vital.

I must Relinquish (give up the pursuit or practice of, desist, cease from) my dependence on me.

For my bride, I pray for her:

Recovery (return to health after illness, injury, misfortune)

Refreshment (to make fresh again)

Reviving (to live again)

Restoration (to be brought back to wholeness)

[1] Google AI search – entomology of recover

Note: Unless otherwise noted, all referenced Scripture is from the WEB World English Bible version of Scripture 

Other posts in our Everlasting Way Series:

Learning How to Overcome Emotional Numbness

Embracing God’s Amazing Love

Are we More Like Batman or Spider-Man

Transforming Awareness: The Power of God’s Love

Minding Your Busyness

Our Deepest Longings Filled

Rules Don’t Rule

Mice in the Sock Drawer

Turning Gainers into Drainers

Until the Darkness Fades

Courage Rising

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

This collection of devotionals chronicles a heartfelt journey from a life of striving and self-reliance to one of growing surrender and trust in God.

Through personal stories of family struggles, cancer, grief, and unexpected trials, the devotions show that true, unshakeable joy comes not from perfect circumstances, but from the constant, loving presence of Jesus Christ.

It’s an invitation to learn to let go of our burdens and find growing peace in God’s greater story.

Finding Joy in Life’s Moments

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.

For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in an old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowingly set off a series of events which uncovers a plot to wipe out a whole family. Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Raw and Weary

(The Everlasting Way) Courage Rising

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I woke up this morning with light breaking through in my weary soul.

It’s a few days after Christmas, and it’s been a December to remember. In the last three weeks my bride has been through teeth issues, a severe case of shingles (V2 – maxillary variation, which affected the middle of her the left side of her face, very close to her eye), and potentially life-threatening blood clots (two of which traveled to her lungs).

She has been such a trouper through it all. 

Personally, I’ve felt extremely inadequate in my role as health care nurse. Nothing in me could have ensured my bride got the care she needed. But God’s strength held us up. I’m seeing that coming to the end of me sooner than later is way better, allowing His strength to shine through me. But it hasn’t been easy. 😑

I haven’t felt a lot of emotions during this time. As has been my MO, I tend to take a deep breath and keep on keeping on with whatever is required. This can be good, but now that there’s a break in the storm, I’m trying to care for my heart, to bring the realities of what’s been happening to Jesus, Keeper of my soul.

During my “soldiering on,” there was a moment, during the operation to remove the clots from my bride’s leg, that the severity of her situation hit me and emotions flowed.

At around 10:30 am, they wheeled her down to a special surgery room in the basement for a procedure that would last about an hour and a half. I met the surgeon and was told where to wait around the corner.

After two hours, I began to worry. I walked around to the surgery room and peeked in through a crack in the door. Bad idea. All I saw was a bunch of blood. Was she okay?

A few minutes later, the surgeon came in and let us know the surgery was successful, but that the clotting was quite extensive. He showed us the clot board. 

My brother-in-law, a cardiologist, flew down from Wilmington, N.C. for the day. After the surgery, he told me how serious the whole thing was.

As my bride continues to heal, I sense a measure of healing in my own soul. As I begin to come out of the raw weariness of what we’ve been experiencing, the Lord is showing me how to steward my heart, bringing all that I am to Him, my God of all comfort. [1]

 I’ve been quite discouraged, although I’ve only recently realized it.

Today I sense courage rising.

Affection

God’s truth always brings me courage. I turn to some of my favorite verses.

If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. 2 Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth (Colossians 3:1-2 KJV).

I particularly like the way the King James renders ‘affection’ from the Greek word – “phroneite.”   

Other versions translate the Greek word as “mind.” But the idea of setting my “affection” on the things above resonates with me this morning.

“Affection” brings my focus from thinking to a heartfelt, whole-soul longing.

It’s so easy for me to set my affections on the happenings of this world, seeking in what I see and experience to carry my hope, my peace, and my joy. These verses help change my focus from all that’s swirling around me and helps me orient my life around God’s eternal truths.

Setting my fondness, my tenderness, my devotion, my attentiveness, my attachment, and my caring on the things above, rather than on the fragility of the here and now, makes so much more sense.

But how do I do that?

Attentiveness

Attentiveness is listed as a synonym for affection.

Our attention is a resource of our minds. Perhaps that’s where the term ‘pay attention’ comes from.

If I spend my attention on sports, politics, entertainment, leisure, etc., these things tend to dominate my affections. There’s nothing wrong with any of these, but they need to be subservient to my higher affection: my Lord Jesus Christ, His commands, and His Kingdom.

As He said:

But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you (Matthew 6:33).

And He said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the great and foremost commandment. 39 The second is like it, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets” (Matthew 22:37-40).

These verses seem to capture Jesus’ desire for us to set our attention and affections on loving Him and others, and on His emerging Kingdom (His rule and His reign).

Only by abiding in the Indwelling Holy Spirit, and yielding to His power, can I set my affection on the things above and not on the temporal things around me. [2]

Prayer

Lord, I thank You so much for Your care for us during these last three weeks. You’ve entrusted us with some hard things, but You have never left our sides.

These hard times quickly brought me to the end of me.[3] I can’t but You can. I need You desperately.

Thank You for the practical ways my wife is seeing how much I love her as You nurse her through me.

Thank You for bringing light to my weary soul and helping me process what we’re going through. And please continue Your healing of my bride, as the pain of shingles continues. 

And Lord, I desire to set my affections on things above, on You and Your emerging Kingdom. Please keep my attention on these things as the temporal world continues to swirl around me. 

Thank You for giving me courage through the truths of Your word.

I love You so much!

Reflection

As I continue to ponder, I see the connection between affection and affecting.

My affections affect who I am.

The words affect and affection come from the same Latin root meaning – “a state produced in a person by something acting upon them.” [4]

As I set my affections on the Lord and His ways, I’m affected in deep, soul transforming ways. 

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. 18 But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit (II Corinthians 3:17-18).

As I am transformed, I pray I might affect (love) all those around me as Christ has loved me. [5]

As I’m affected in the ways of Christ, as Christ is formed in me [6], His life is revealed. 

For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God (Colossians 3:3).

Quotes 

  • “Where your pleasure is, there is your treasure; where your treasure is, there is your heart; where your heart is, there is your happiness.”  Augustine of Hippo (Augustine is essentially saying: your affections follow what you attend to.) [4]

  • “We are often distracted by trifles, and seldom fully recollected.” Thomas à Kempis (Our attention drifts toward what our hearts are already leaning toward.) [4]

  • “Set your affections on the things above, and your thoughts will follow.” John Owens (He often taught that attention is the steering wheel of the heart.) [4]

[1] II Corinthians 1:3-5

[2] John 15:5

[3] II Corinthians 1:8-9

[4] From Co-Pilot

[5] John 13:34-35, John 15:12

Note: Unless otherwise noted, all referenced Scripture is from the NASB 1995 version of the Bible.

Other posts in our Everlasting Way Series:

Learning How to Overcome Emotional Numbness

Embracing God’s Amazing Love

Are we More Like Batman or Spider-Man

Transforming Awareness: The Power of God’s Love

Minding Your Busyness

Our Deepest Longings Filled

Rules Don’t Rule

Mice in the Sock Drawer

Turning Gainers into Drainers

Until the Darkness Fades

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

This collection of devotionals chronicles a heartfelt journey from a life of striving and self-reliance to one of growing surrender and trust in God.

Through personal stories of family struggles, cancer, grief, and unexpected trials, the devotions show that true, unshakeable joy comes not from perfect circumstances, but from the constant, loving presence of Jesus Christ.

It’s an invitation to learn to let go of our burdens and find growing peace in God’s greater story.

Finding Joy in Life’s Moments

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.

For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in an old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowingly set off a series of events which uncovers a plot to wipe out a whole family. Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Raw and Weary

(The Everlasting Way) Courage Rising

Leave a comment

I woke up this morning with light breaking through in my weary soul.

It’s a few days after Christmas, and it’s been a December to remember. In the last three weeks my bride has been through teeth issues, a severe case of shingles (V2 – maxillary variation, which affected the middle of her the left side of her face, very close to her eye), and potentially life-threatening blood clots (two of which traveled to her lungs).

She has been such a trouper through it all. 

Personally, I’ve felt extremely inadequate in my role as health care nurse. Nothing in me could have ensured my bride got the care she needed. But God’s strength held us up. I’m seeing that coming to the end of me sooner than later is way better, allowing His strength to shine through me. But it hasn’t been easy. 😑

I haven’t felt a lot of emotions during this time. As has been my MO, I tend to take a deep breath and keep on keeping on with whatever is required. This can be good, but now that there’s a break in the storm, I’m trying to care for my heart, to bring the realities of what’s been happening to Jesus, Keeper of my soul.

During my “soldiering on,” there was a moment, during the operation to remove the clots from my bride’s leg, that the severity of her situation hit me and emotions flowed.

At around 10:30 am, they wheeled her down to a special surgery room in the basement for a procedure that would last about an hour and a half. I met the surgeon and was told where to wait around the corner.

After two hours, I began to worry. I walked around to the surgery room and peeked in through a crack in the door. Bad idea. All I saw was a bunch of blood. Was she okay?

A few minutes later, the surgeon came in and let us know the surgery was successful, but that the clotting was quite extensive. He showed us the clot board. 

My brother-in-law, a cardiologist, flew down from Wilmington, N.C. for the day. After the surgery, he told me how serious the whole thing was.

As my bride continues to heal, I sense a measure of healing in my own soul. As I begin to come out of the raw weariness of what we’ve been experiencing, the Lord is showing me how to steward my heart, bringing all that I am to Him, my God of all comfort. [1]

 I’ve been quite discouraged, although I’ve only recently realized it.

Today I sense courage rising.

Affection

God’s truth always brings me courage. I turn to some of my favorite verses.

If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. 2 Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth (Colossians 3:1-2 KJV).

I particularly like the way the King James renders ‘affection’ from the Greek word – “phroneite.”   

Other versions translate the Greek word as “mind.” But the idea of setting my “affection” on the things above resonates with me this morning.

“Affection” brings my focus from thinking to a heartfelt, whole-soul longing.

It’s so easy for me to set my affections on the happenings of this world, seeking in what I see and experience to carry my hope, my peace, and my joy. These verses help change my focus from all that’s swirling around me and helps me orient my life around God’s eternal truths.

Setting my fondness, my tenderness, my devotion, my attentiveness, my attachment, and my caring on the things above, rather than on the fragility of the here and now, makes so much more sense.

But how do I do that?

Attentiveness

Attentiveness is listed as a synonym for affection.

Our attention is a resource of our minds. Perhaps that’s where the term ‘pay attention’ comes from.

If I spend my attention on sports, politics, entertainment, leisure, etc., these things tend to dominate my affections. There’s nothing wrong with any of these, but they need to be subservient to my higher affection: my Lord Jesus Christ, His commands, and His Kingdom.

As He said:

But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you (Matthew 6:33).

And He said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the great and foremost commandment. 39 The second is like it, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets” (Matthew 22:37-40).

These verses seem to capture Jesus’ desire for us to set our attention and affections on loving Him and others, and on His emerging Kingdom (His rule and His reign).

Only by abiding in the Indwelling Holy Spirit, and yielding to His power, can I set my affection on the things above and not on the temporal things around me. [2]

Prayer

Lord, I thank You so much for Your care for us during these last three weeks. You’ve entrusted us with some hard things, but You have never left our sides.

These hard times quickly brought me to the end of me.[3] I can’t but You can. I need You desperately.

Thank You for the practical ways my wife is seeing how much I love her as You nurse her through me.

Thank You for bringing light to my weary soul and helping me process what we’re going through. And please continue Your healing of my bride, as the pain of shingles continues. 

And Lord, I desire to set my affections on things above, on You and Your emerging Kingdom. Please keep my attention on these things as the temporal world continues to swirl around me. 

Thank You for giving me courage through the truths of Your word.

I love You so much!

Reflection

As I continue to ponder, I see the connection between affection and affecting.

My affections affect who I am.

The words affect and affection come from the same Latin root meaning – “a state produced in a person by something acting upon them.” [4]

As I set my affections on the Lord and His ways, I’m affected in deep, soul transforming ways. 

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. 18 But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit (II Corinthians 3:17-18).

As I am transformed, I pray I might affect (love) all those around me as Christ has loved me. [5]

As I’m affected in the ways of Christ, as Christ is formed in me [6], His life is revealed. 

For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God (Colossians 3:3).

Quotes 

  • “Where your pleasure is, there is your treasure; where your treasure is, there is your heart; where your heart is, there is your happiness.”  Augustine of Hippo (Augustine is essentially saying: your affections follow what you attend to.) [4]

  • “We are often distracted by trifles, and seldom fully recollected.” Thomas à Kempis (Our attention drifts toward what our hearts are already leaning toward.) [4]

  • “Set your affections on the things above, and your thoughts will follow.” John Owens (He often taught that attention is the steering wheel of the heart.) [4]

[1] II Corinthians 1:3-5

[2] John 15:5

[3] II Corinthians 1:8-9

[4] From Co-Pilot

[5] John 13:34-35, John 15:12

Note: Unless otherwise noted, all referenced Scripture is from the NASB 1995 version of the Bible.

Other posts in our Everlasting Way Series:

Learning How to Overcome Emotional Numbness

Embracing God’s Amazing Love

Are we More Like Batman or Spider-Man

Transforming Awareness: The Power of God’s Love

Minding Your Busyness

Our Deepest Longings Filled

Rules Don’t Rule

Mice in the Sock Drawer

Turning Gainers into Drainers

Until the Darkness Fades

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

This collection of devotionals chronicles a heartfelt journey from a life of striving and self-reliance to one of growing surrender and trust in God.

Through personal stories of family struggles, cancer, grief, and unexpected trials, the devotions show that true, unshakeable joy comes not from perfect circumstances, but from the constant, loving presence of Jesus Christ.

It’s an invitation to learn to let go of our burdens and find growing peace in God’s greater story.

Finding Joy in Life’s Moments

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.

For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in an old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowingly set off a series of events which uncovers a plot to wipe out a whole family. Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

God of all Comfort

(The Everlasting Way) Learning to Overcome Emotional Numbness.

Leave a comment

Guarded Heart

I first saw my father drunk when my mother wasn’t at home. At ten years old, I was the eldest of three children. My mom and sister were out shopping, and I was with my younger brother.

It was a Sunday, and I was watching a football game on TV. I wasn’t really paying attention to my dad when he came home and sat in his favorite chair beside me.

I found out later he’d been drinking with his friend Charlie.

The Packers were playing, which was Dad’s favorite team. When they scored a touchdown, I assumed he’d be happy, and I wanted to celebrate with him. I pointed out the touchdown, but to my horror, he blurted out something unintelligible.

It was the first time I’d seen anyone drunk, and I remember all the details to this day, fifty-nine years later. 😒

He made his way to the living room, and when he stooped to pet our cat he fell down. I didn’t know what to do. Eventually, he made his way to the hall and bounced between the walls to his bedroom.

There were no cell phones in those days, so I just had to wait.

After a short while, I heard laughing coming from the bedroom. Dad was tickling my little brother. He was too young to realize what was going on.

I vividly remember how relieved I was when my mother and sister came home. I yelled out, “Dad’s drunk,” but I didn’t cry. I couldn’t process the emotions. I felt numb.

A few years, later Dad’s drinking would cost him his job, his marriage, and almost his life.

All my life, I’ve struggled with hard emotions. I really don’t know what to do with them. I have a tendency to process difficulties mentally, but my heart often feels disengaged.

Since that moment so many years ago, my father, my mother, and my sister have passed away. As sad as these loses are, I’ve not been able to shed but a trickle of tears.

Just Feel it

I once told a trusted counselor that I wasn’t sure what to do with some feelings I was having concerning our estranged child.

“What do you mean you don’t know what to do with the feelings?” she asked forcefully. “You need to feel them!”

This was painfully obvious to her but I didn’t know how.

She went onto tell me that the armor which had guarded my heart as a child served me well at the time, as I navigated Dad’s drinking and my parents’ divorce, but I’d outgrown it now.

She told me I needed to learn how to explore and process my emotions. She gave me some tips on how to do this, using different crayon colors to represent feelings, and describing what I was feeling in my journal.

This helped, but I gave the process up too soon. Much work remained.

The Bible says I’m to, “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.” [1]

How can I weep with those who weep if I can’t weep myself?

Crying is not something you can fake. The tears well up or they don’t.

Though I’ve had plenty of opportunities to be sad, I don’t weep well.

God of all Comfort

Some key verses the Lord has been using to begin to dislodge the clogged feelings in my heart are:

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. 5 For just as the sufferings of Christ are ours in abundance, so also our comfort is abundant through Christ.   (2 Corinthians 1:3-5 NASB).

I love the word translated as “comfort.” In the Greek it means to summons, to call near, to provide consolation.

As I call God near to my hidden emotions, I’m beginning to experience some softening in the crusted over parts of my heart. His Rivers of Living Water [2] are awakening the deadened sinews and allowing me to feel more alive.

I have a long way to go, but I know God’s at work.

In a recent journal entry, this is what I sense God was saying to me concerning my emotional pain:

Don’t deny the sadness and disappointments in your life. Keep bringing it all to me. The old ones, the new ones. There’s hurt, but like light and salt heal physical wounds, there’s freedom and healing when you call Me near. I’m the God of all comfort. I want to bind every crevice of your broken heart with the Joy of My presence. To the extent you allow My Oil of Gladness in to soften and soothe your pain, true compassion will grow. And as the more hidden places in your heart are brought to My Life and Light, the more you’ll experience the Joy of us being together.

Prayer

Lord, thank You for showing me how important it is to call You near in my sadness and disappointments. Thank you for showing me that denying my deep emotional pain is not what You intend. Some of these losses are extremely hard. My heart and eyes begin to sting when I embrace the magnitude of hurt and loss.

But You are my Life. These feelings are not a surprise to You, Jesus. Isaiah described You as a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief. [3] You know my innermost parts. You knit me together. [4]

You love me deeply. Please keep me from ever doubting Your love for me because of circumstances I face.

I love You, Lord.

Amen.

Reflections

It’s been a while since my counselor encouraged me to work on identifying and writing about my feelings.  I started off strong but didn’t persevere.

Since then, I’ve been introduced to a feeling wheel of color with different nuances of “Happy” “Surprise,” “Fear,” “Anger,” “Disgust,” and “Sad.”

This is going to replace the crayons as I pick back up on identifying and expressing my feelings.

With colored pens, representing feelings, I recently journaled the following emotions concerning a new event in a long-time sadness, which seems to only get worse:

I won’t go into the details from my journal, but the feelings wheel helped me identify that I felt: Victimized, Violated, Irritated, Provoked, Disrespected, and Shocked.

I imagine most opportunities to feel wouldn’t require so many emotions to unpack, but this was a deep, unexpected wound.  The process really helped.

I expect this renewed vigor to both identify and process my feelings will continue to lead me to a deeper awareness of God’s everlasting, non-changing love for me in spite of what happens next.

I want to soak often in God’s everlasting, unchanging love for me. The Lord appeared to him long ago, saying, “I have loved you with an everlasting love; Therefore I have drawn you out with kindness (Jeremiah 31:3 NASB).

What I’ve just written is not meant to be a knock on my dad. It’s about my own battle with stuffing hard emotions and learning how to feel again.

My father came to saving faith in Jesus Christ later in life. Though he struggled with his alcoholism even after his conversion, his eventual total dependence upon the Lord with his drinking problem led to sober living the last fifteen years of his life. Dad’s story.

[1] Romans 12:15

[2] John 7:37-39

[3] Isaiah 53:3

[4] Psalm 139:13

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

This collection of devotionals chronicles a heartfelt journey from a life of striving and self-reliance to one of growing surrender and trust in God.

Through personal stories of family struggles, cancer, grief, and unexpected trials, the devotions show that true, unshakeable joy comes not from perfect circumstances, but from the constant, loving presence of Jesus Christ.

It’s an invitation to learn to let go of our burdens and find growing peace in God’s greater story.

Finding Joy in Life’s Moments

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.

For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in an old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowingly set off a series of events which uncovers a plot to wipe out a whole family. Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

 

Strengthening our Faith, When God seems Distant

(In the Moments) Mustering Our Faith

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I have a friend who’s gone through a hard year. He’s a believer, but a key relationship in his life dealt him a devastating blow. Heart wrenching betrayal and rejection have left him feeling weak and vulnerable. He admitted that his circumstances have caused him to doubt God’s love for him, and even to wonder if He even exists at all.

These kinds of life altering events can render us feeling so sad, we’re hardly able to function. They can include losses of jobs, material possessions, and relationships. Or medical diagnoses which radically change the course of our lives.

How do we muster our faith in times like these?

Mustering Our Faith  

Muster–to assemble troops as for a battle, to gather, to summon, to rouse

Regularly, we have repeated opportunities to gather and summon our faith. Like working out in the gym, rousing our trust, when things aren’t smooth, builds muscle memory and strengthens our faith.

How do we muster our faith when we feel weak and God seems distant? Following are a few musts.

We Must Remember God’s Sovereignty

God is always in control. Nothing can thwart His purposes. He’s able to work all things together for His greater purposes. [1] Even the very hard situations we face are no surprise to God. His power transcends human sin, worldly corruption, and evil designs.

Joseph told his brothers that they had intended him harm, but God had used it for good, saving many lives. [2]

God used Jonah’s disobedience to elicit praise from the folks on the ship to Tarshish. [3]

The Jewish leaders’ evil plan to kill Jesus resulted in the salvation of humanity.

God has entrusted us with each circumstance we’re in and desires us to trust Him and not lean on our own understanding. [4]

We Must Orient Our Lives from God’s Greater Story

Paul tells believers that since Christ raised us up, we should set our minds on things above, not on earthly things. [5]

An eternal perspective reveals God working for our ultimate benefit. He’s working all things to conform us into the image of Christ, not for us to experience a smooth ride. [6] It’s vital for us to understand this. If not, we can view God as a distant dictator, out to destroy our hopes and dreams.

We need to live now with the end in mind. This life centers on emulating Christ, not mere temporary happiness. For we died and our lives are now hidden in Christ. [7]

We Must Realize Being with God is Our Highest Joy

The Bible has an overarching theme, woven into the fabric from Genesis to Revelation. God with us.

David confidently stated that the shadow of death could not make him afraid, as he believed in the presence of God with him. [8] He also wrote that in God’s presence, joy is full. [9]

 After crying out to God concerning the unfairness of life, Asaph concluded that God’s nearness was his good, not his lot in life. [10]

While imprisoned in Rome, Paul urged us to rejoice in the Lord. Not just when we feel like it, but always. [11]

We Must Remember God’s Love for us Never Fails

No matter how often we fall short in actions and faith, God’s love for us never fails, it’s everlasting. [12] His lovingkindness never ceases. His mercies are new every morning. [13]

 Before creation, God established us as His children. Nothing can separate us from His great love. We can describe His love for us as deeper, wider, longer than an ocean, and higher than the heavens. It surpasses our ability to comprehend. [16]

Challenge

What current challenges make you doubt God’s love or even His existence?

Talk to God about these things. That’s what David and other Psalmists did. If you journal, write them out. If not, talk to God about these things out loud. He wants us to bring our cares to Him. 

The ‘musts’ above are not exhaustive, but they may help you muster your faith. Try them. 

Prayer

Lord, we come to You now. You know the place we’re in. You’re not surprised by any of it. You’re with us and have allowed all things for our greater good. Help us not to doubt Your ways. May we draw near to You and walk in utter dependence upon You. You never intended us to face these things alone. We depend upon Your strength in our weakness. Amen.

And He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (2nd Corinthians 12:9-10 NASB)

Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand (Isaiah 41:10 NASB).

[1] Ephesians 1:9-12

[2] Genesis 50:20 (NASB)

[3] Jonah 1:14-16

[4] Proverbs 3:5-6

[5] Colossians 3:1-2

[6] Romans 8:28-29

[7] Colossians 3:3

[8] Psalm 23:4

[9] Psalm 16:11b

[10] Psalm 73, 73:28

[11] Philippians 3:1, 4:4

[12] Jeremiah 31:3

[13] Lamentations 3:22-23

[14] Ephesians 1:4-5

[15] Romans 8:35

[16] Ephesians 3:14-19

Other posts in our series In the Moments:

As Sea Gulls Fly

It is Finished

Behold the Moments

Tranquility

Stop Striving

Simplicity In Christ

What is Good

Yet Will I Rejoice

Sorrowful, Yet Always Rejoicing

Exploring Grace and Joy together

Stay Present My Friends

Quiddity. It Could Change Your Life

The Cake Maker’s Blunder

God at Work (No Trespassing)

Hidden with Christ in God

Finding Joy in Love and Relationships

Escaping the Rat Race

When I don’t Feel God’s Loving Kindness

Experiencing Completeness in Christ

Overcoming Pain Through Faith

Recalibrating Our Hearts

The Joy of Waiting

On the Fifth Day God Created Dog

When Things get Really Hard

A No Lose Situation, Even with Cancer

Hey Pop

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.

For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in an old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

The Righteousness of God

Packages (Part 6)

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Dear reader, Packages is an allegory. There will be roughly a dozen parts before Bobby wakes up from a very long, lifelike dream. He'll then seek an interpretation.

Part 1 

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

I found myself on the packages again on Saturday, with no body of water in sight. I sat deep in a valley, surrounded by towering piles of boxes. The rising sun remained hidden from view; its presence only hinted at by the pastel hues of dawn. The location matched my mood.

The sobering events of the previous day made me cringe as they seeped into my groggy consciousness. As troubling as the work situation was, I was more concerned about not being reconciled with Jill. Over the years, we’d learned to navigate through difficulties, particularly when one could sense the other’s reaction stemmed from unresolved past hurts. Together, with faith in God, we’d learned to reveal and dismantle the longstanding falsehoods that had troubled our lives. It was rare for us to sleep without settling our differences and kissing. The previous night was particularly challenging because we both reacted from deep-seated pain and failed to extend grace before the day’s end. I knew it was my responsibility to lead in that regard, but I hadn’t.

I recalled His words that the packages were brimming with kindness, grace, and love—qualities I desperately needed to embrace the day ahead. Accepting His grace proved particularly challenging. Especially in light of how I’d failed to lead Jill and, with my growing unforgiveness and bitterness with Mike.

Even so, I was certain nothing could separate me from God’s love, not even my own shame.

I contemplated the Hebrew word “Hesed,” which translates to lovingkindness.

And Psalm 23 verse 6: Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

I recalled that this word embodies a divine love which transcends human understanding; like how God pursues us, in spite of our disobedience. Like how Hosea pursued Gomer, his harlot wife. [1]

Immersed in a deep awareness of His lovingkindness, my heart grew tender. I longed to embrace Jill and admit my mistake. We never do well when we’re not right with each other. 

“There’s something else in these boxes,” He said, again catching me off guard. “You’re absorbing more than just kindness, grace and love.”

“Read II Corinthians 5:21.”

I picked up the Bible resting on the box in front of me and read, He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.

“Can you guess what else you’ve been soaking in?” He asked.

“The righteousness of Christ Jesus?”

“Very good. Can that righteousness be diminished by anything you do or don’t do?” 

I paused a moment before answering. A new understanding was budding in my heart. “No. Since You chose me, by Your mercy, to be Your son before I was even born, nothing I do or don’t do can affect it. Right?”

 “That’s right,” He said. “My children know this, but our enemy is relentless in seeking to hide My grace and love. His efforts are multiplied as his end draws near. Bobby, sometimes you still soak in his lies and not My truth”

“What did Paul say about righteousness in Ephesians 6?”

“He told us to put on the breastplate of righteousness, as we gird our loins with truth and take up the shield of faith.” I felt faith rising and continued. “This allows us to extinguish all the flaming missiles of the evil one. All of them!”

“Never drop your shield of faith. Believe you have My righteousness. No matter what happens, stay the course.”

Having rekindled my faith, He left me to my reflections. The shame I felt now appeared absurd. I knew my life was meant to be rooted in His righteousness, not my own. I realized that whenever I lost focus on this truth, I was on shacky ground and very vulnerable.

Unbeknownst to me, I was no longer in a valley; the mound of packages I rested on had ascended beyond the horizon. I was now in full view of a crystal blue sea, which reflected the magnificence of the eternal dawn.

Jill and I were able to have a cup of coffee together before I went to the office. I apologized for acting out of my fear of failure and need to succeed. I also told her I was sorry for not initiating forgiveness the night before. 

“I forgive you on both counts,” she said, as we hugged. “I’m not sure I was ready to be resolved last night anyway. I was stewing in my own feelings of rejection. But I recognized this morning that these lies are ancient. I’m sorry too. God has used you to help me see the lies from the past I still tend to live in.”

“I’m glad,” I said. “Us honoring our covenant of marriage before God has been what’s held us together and allowed our love to grow. We’ve had some very hard stretches.”

She agreed.

As I entered the office, I heard, “Ask Me.”

I found Kevin at his desk, his head in his hands, same shirt on from the day before. “The batches of data are two large,” he said in a defeated tone when he noticed me. “I tried dividing them into smaller datasets, but they lose the associated header, footer and provider tags. I’m out of ideas.”

I’d never seen Kevin in such a state. His perseverance and determination were remarkable, but he was clearly at the end of his rope.

Remembering His message, I asked Him for guidance. Then I ran through different possibilities in my mind.

“I have an idea,” I said after a few minutes. “I think I can use Easytrieve, a mainframe programming tool, to generate smaller datasets while preserving the tags. This would mean we’d be handling smaller batches during the data transfer and the script processing.”

Kevin thought it was a good idea and assisted me in mapping the fields. In forty-five minutes, we’d successfully written a quick program and validated the theory with a batch of data which had previously abended. 

“Eureka!” Kevin exclaimed. We did a computer nerd version of a high five.

 We kicked off a batch of scripts, which we hoped would process all the data by early Sunday afternoon. He showed me how to check for problems in his script and how to monitor the progress remotely.

I sent him home to rest and made sure the first few batches were successful.

When I got home, Jill was wrapping Alice’s surprise birthday gift.

The plan was for us to distract Alice in the backyard while friends and family streamed into her house to surprise her. 

“I can hide her present in the bottom of my purse,” Jill exclaimed. 

“I knew that giant bag would come in handy for something,” I joked, earning me a playful elbow to the ribs.

I was so excited about our gift to Alice. Knowing his days on earth were winding down, her husband, Ray, had asked me to video a message to his family. Jill and I downloaded it to an electronic picture frame, which was our present to Alice and their kids. 

Right before we knocked on the back door, my phone vibrated with a text. Jill heard it too and looked at me with disappointment.

“Is it work?” she exclaimed bitterly.

The extensive time and mental energy I devoted to work-related activities over the years had become a longstanding source of pain and feelings of neglect for Jill. I endeavored to understand my wife better, continually learning more about her. I was beginning to realize that some of her reactions stemmed from deep-seated pain, some of which originated in her childhood and was triggered by something I did, said, or failed to do. While I acknowledge that I have also caused her pain, I was learning not to take it personally all the time. This approach helped me to remain non-defensive, at least some of the time. Which is hard for a guy like me who thrives to succeed and please people.

“No, it’s Sammy,” I replied, also happy it wasn’t work related. “He’s asking if he and his family can join us at our church tomorrow.”

“Wow! That would be great,” Jill exclaimed. “Alton as well?”

“I’m not sure,” I replied, as I knocked on Alice’s back door. I heard, “Be bold.“

To Be Continued

[1] The book of Hosea

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

 

The Lord our Courage

Packages (Part 5)

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Dear reader, Some of you have asked where this Packages series is going. It's an allegory. There will be resolution and interpretation.

Part 1 

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

As I found myself resting on the packages the next morning, I wondered again if I was experiencing a long dream. If so, I hoped it would end soon. I had so many questions.

How did my time resting on these packages each morning seem to fuel my interaction with people that day.? How could cardboard boxes cause me to be filled with a quality of love which seemed out of this world? It had to be Him and not the packages.

Though I saw packages addressed to each person, I never remembered physically handing them to anyone. Was delivery really about the interaction and not the actual packages?

I did get my job back, but with conditions. I was put on probation and warned not to “push” my faith on anyone. I wasn’t sure what that meant, but I didn’t trust Mike enough to ask him. 

I determined to still offer to pray with folks as the opportunity arose. And if asked, I would explain the reason for my hope to anyone. Resting on the packages, I felt certain of this. I hoped I’d stand firm when opportunities for boldness arose.  

I didn’t want to regret not allowing the light of Jesus to shine through me.

Then He spoke. This time, my anger at Fred’s cancer was not within me. Being with Sammy and Alton had given me a new perspective.

Reading my thoughts, He said, “You are learning my son. Like Sammy, like Fred, God sized problems are meant to prove you can’t. And when you see that, you learn that I can.

“What did Paul write in II Corinthians 1:8-9?”

I picked up the Bible resting on the box in front of me and read, “For we do not want you to be unaware, brethren, of our affliction which came to us in Asia, that we were burdened excessively, beyond our strength, so that we despaired even of life; 9 indeed, we had the sentence of death within ourselves so that we would not trust in ourselves, but in God who raises the dead;”

“What was Paul going through?” He asked.

“So many difficulties that he despaired of his life. I guess he’d come to the end of his strength.”

“Exactly, you’ve read in other places what he endured.  [1] So you have an idea of what it might have been. What was his conclusion?” 

“He realized since the situation was beyond his abilities to endure, trusting in himself was no longer an option. He had to learn to trust in You.”

“That’s right,” He said. “Can you relate?”

I could. Several situations came to mind, including our difficulties with our oldest child. I remember thinking once, when that and other problems seemed to multiple, that if I knew where to go to give up, I would. I wasn’t suicidal, but like Paul, I’d come to the end of me.

Again, reading my thoughts, He said, “You made a wise choice back then. You could have wasted the pain by trying to numb it, but you brought it all to Me.” 

It was Friday.  The end of a very weird week. I was hoping Mike had assigned someone to handle my duties. Otherwise, it was going to be a long weekend. I imagined Kevin would have been given some of my tasks, but he had his own work to do.

Kevin looked up from his cubicle when I arrived and followed me into my office. 

I heard, “Be courageous.”

After discussing the current work load, Kevin said, “I’ve been thinking about what you said on Monday. I really appreciated you trusting me enough to tell me about the times of despair you’ve experienced. You alluded to a deep hope which lifted you from your discouragement. As I’ve told you before, I’m not a religious person, but I respect your opinion and would love to hear more. The situation with Clarissa has me pretty down.”

I had no idea I’d be tested about being bold with my faith so quickly. I told him I’d love to tell him what happened and the reason for my hope. We agreed to have lunch on Monday.

When Kevin walked out of my office, Mike came in. I wondered if he’d been outside listening. I heard, “Keep your peace.” 

Mike said nothing about my being with Kevin. He seemed to be only interested in work. We’d gotten a new client, so work had gotten dangerously backlogged. He was getting pressure from the top to get caught up or risk breaking contracted deliverables with our customers. He told me he expected us to be caught up by Monday morning. When he said “us” I grumbled in my spirit about what part of “us” he was doing. 

When Mike left, I could feel my stomach begin to twist.

During the next couple of hours, I was able to get a handle on how much work had to be done. It was massive. I could see myself missing my Friday date night with Jill and Alice’s surprise party on Saturday. I’d invited Fred and his wife to church with us, seems I’d miss that too. 

I heard a knock. It was Kevin. I glanced at my watch and was astonished it was already time for break. I’d always told Kevin it was important to take breaks, but this time I wanted to renege. 

In the canteen, I explained my conversation with Mike to Kevin. He already knew some of it. “Mike came to me on Wednesday and tried to hand off a ton of work to me. I think they hoped I’d be able to pick right up and handle it,” Kevin began. “I got started but have questions and needed your help. So, I reported that back to Mike. In the meantime, I’ve been playing around with a Visual Basic script we could possibly use to scrape the data from the mainframe and then kick off our processes. I’ve had some success, but need some procedural direction.”

After hearing Mike’s interaction with Kevin, I felt more like I was being used. I certainly didn’t feel like anyone in management really cared. Were they allowing me to work just to solve the present crisis? I felt insecure.

For the rest of the day I feed Kevin information to further fine tune his script. By days end, we had it working on a small sample. However, when we tried it on a batch of larger data, we kept getting region abends. Even after we maxed out the value, there was no success. I was getting a sinking feeling.

When I noticed it was approaching 6pm, and said, “Let me call Jill and cancel our date.”

Kevin stopped me. He had some ideas he wanted to try. He couldn’t get over the fact that we still dated after over forty years of marriage and he didn’t want us to miss it. We agree to reconvene in the morning.

When I pulled into our driveway to pick Jill up, I heard. “Cast your cares on Me.” They were fine words, but my heart couldn’t receive them.

Jill and I had a nice Italian dinner at one of our favorite spots. Then we walked across the dam at sunset, one of our favorite things to do. I tried to stay present, but she could tell I was preoccupied. I resisted the temptation to check on how Kevin was doing, but my lack of truly being “with” Jill hurt her. This resurfaced some unresolved bitterness toward me.

Then, her disappointment in me stirred up a deep failure place in my soul and I became defensive. Not a good posture for a loving date.

To top it off, I got a late text from Kevin saying he was going home with little success. He suspected a memory leak, but he needed some time away to ponder a solution.

Without Kevin’s script, I could work the next 48 hours and come well short of what Mike and his directors were expecting. 

Jill and I went to bed back to back and unresolved. The knots in my stomach were only growing tighter as I tried to sleep.

To Be Continued

[1] II Corinthians 11:23-33

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

 

In Christ, Our Union with Christ, Seated with Christ

Rhythms: UP (Raised up With Christ)

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But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up with Him, and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus (Ephesians 2:4-6 NASB)

A central thread of the Bible is God’s desire to be WITH us. As believers, the Holy Spirit indwells us. Christ, not our own striving, is our source of Life.

In addition to Christ being in us, there’s another amazing dimension to our union with Him. When Christ was raised into newness of life, we believers were raised up with Him. Not only is Christ in us, but we are also in Him.

In his book, Union with Christ, Rankin Wilbourne writes that the word “Christian” is only used three times in the New Testament letters. However, Paul uses ” in Christ” 165 times to describe those who follow Christ. [1] 

Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1 NASB).

But by His doing you are in Christ Jesus, who became to us wisdom from God, and righteousness and sanctification, and redemption (I Corinthians 1:30 NASB),

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come (II Corinthians 5:17 NASB).

Being raised up in Christ is essential to who we are. Paul puts in this way in Colossians 3:3-4, “For you have died and your life is hidden with Christ in God.  When Christ, who is our life, is revealed, then you also will be revealed with Him in glory.”

Being dead, and now hidden in Christ, adds far-reaching, glorious implications to our daily lives which we don’t want to miss. Let’s look at a few.

In Christ, We have a New Self

..in reference to your former manner of life, you lay aside the old self, which is being corrupted in accordance with the lusts of deceit, and that you be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and put on the new self, which in the likeness of God has been created in righteousness and holiness of the truth (Ephesians 4:22b-24 NASB)

We know our lives are now hidden in Christ. We’ve been raised with Him in newness of life. However, as mentioned before, we can still choose to walk in our old manner of life.

Paul gives a command to lay aside our old self, reminding us that it’s steeped in corruption. Lay aside – put off, put away.

So when we’re tempted to walk in our old ways, and we certainly will be, we’re to make a choice based on our renewed minds. Seeing clearly that our former way of living leads only to death, we can now choose life.

In this divine realization, we’re to put on our new self, turning away from the corruption of the old.  “Put on” has the connotation of sinking into as with clothing. It literally means to clothe ourselves. So, since our lives are hidden in Christ, we’re to walk in our new selves, created in righteousness and holiness.

What possible benefit, other than coddling fleeting, empty pleasures can come from engaging our old ways of living? It’s exactly what our enemy wants us to do, but we are not unaware of his lies. Our minds have been renewed.

and do not give the devil an opportunity (Ephesians 4:27 NASB) 

Story: Wilborne writes of a friend who was the person inside the Mickey Mouse costume at Disney Land. Reflecting on her time “in Mickey” she felt safe and loved, hidden in a different identity. “She recalled praying, ‘Lord, is this what it’s like to have masses of people run towards you with joy, excitement, and eagerness?'” [2] 

Rankin’s friend’s identity changed every time she took the Mickey costume off. Our identify in Christ does not change. The question for us is clear. Do we choose to put off our old self, steeped in corruption, and put on our new identify in Christ?

For me, it’s a moment by moment choice to put off the lies of the enemy and trust that in Christ I  walk in newness of life.

In Christ, We Have a New View

Therefore if you have been raised up with Christ, keep seeking the things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your mind on the things above, not on the things that are on earth (Colossians  3:1-2 NASB).

In the above verses, Paul tells us how the truth of our position with Christ should change our perspective.

 Even though we physically live on earth, our view is to be from above where we’re spiritually seated with Christ. This means we’re to focus on  what God cares about, even in the midst of our daily activities. We’re to keep seeking (require, be about, aim at) the things above.  As our days unfolds, our higher desires should be on what God wants, not just a happy life.

What are God’s higher desires for us? Among other things, He’s at work conforming His children into the image of Christ [3]. He wants us to love others as Christ loves us. He desires for our words to be His words and our deeds to be in His strength, that He would be glorified in all we do. [4]

Focusing on what God desires for us, above our personal desires, doesn’t mean a joyless life. In fact, it means just the opposite. Orienting our lives from above means God Himself is our delight, not the trappings of the world. [5] Christ, the Source of all Joy, is our life, no matter what we face.

Story: Like many others, hard circumstances have occurred in my life which I can’t change. And believe me, I’ve tried!

Sad circumstances have threaten to discourage me and steal my joy. But I have a  growing trust in what God is doing from His eternal throne. I don’t want to ignore my grief, so I try and invite Him into it, but I don’t walk around in sadness. Over time, and through the difficulties, God is skillfully and lovingly, uncovering the lie that I need happy circumstances to be okay.

From my new view with Christ, I’m more an d more seeing my life from what God is doing to conform me into His image. With this is in mind, joy is growing, even in the midst of pain.

In Christ, We are Complete 

For in Him all the fullness of Deity dwells in bodily form, and in Him you have been made complete, and He is the head over all rule and authority (Colossians 2:9-10 NASB);

In the 1600s Bliase Pascal wrote that man’s cravings for true happiness can only be filled with an infinite, immutable object. He wrote that man tries in vain to fill this void with everything around him, seeking in (what is not) only what God Himself can give us. [6]  This came to be known as our God shaped void.

To summarize, we were created with an incompleteness that only God can fill .

Incomplete: not having all the necessary or appropriate parts, not full or finished. [7]  

Our problem is that, in our nagging sense of need, we attempt all manner of temporal ways to fill the void and feel complete.

  • Being loved by people
  • Our success in our different roles
  • Accumulating possessions
  • Happiness from smooth circumstances
  • Overloading our senses by living an epicurean lifestyle

These and other pursuits may partially fill the vastness of our souls, but each leads only to longings for more. We simply can not satisfy the deep longings of our soul with anything temporal.

The word “complete” in the above verse also means to make full, render perfect, fill to the brim, to receive fulfillment.

So, in Christ we’ve received the fulfillment our hearts have longed for. We are filled to the brim with Christ, lacking nothing.

But we must believe it and walk in it.

in Him (Christ) you have been made complete

Story: One evening, a few years ago I felt utterly undone.  My heart was filled with failure, disappointment and relational pain. It was close to midnight and I decided to take a walk up our road and across the two lane highway at the top. On the way “out” I surrendered my burdens to God the best I knew how.

When I  got to the end of the cul-de-sac across the highway and circled around to head back home, a deep peace invaded my soul. The problems seemed to be overshadowed by the Lord’s nearness. I pondered the truth of my completeness in Christ. I thought of being filled to the brim and overflowing with Christ. In those moments, all the burdens and pains were swept away in the awareness of this marvelous truth.

I’m complete in Christ, in need of nothing, no matter what I face.

Since that time, I’ve sometimes felt the same feelings of discouragement and incompleteness. But, I go back to the truth etched in my heart those years ago.

In Christ Jesus, I’m complete, lacking nothing. 

Conclusion

As believers, though we walk on this earth, we’ve been raised WITH Christ into heavenly places. Being “in Christ” is the best description of who we now are.

Though, as long as live on earth, we fight our fleshly tendencies, in Christ we’ve been made new creations. We can now choose to put off our old ways, laced in death, and put on our new selves, in Christ.

In Christ, we’ve been raised above the temporal view. We can see things from God’s greater purposes. As we orient our lives from God’s eternal perspective, what He desires becomes more and more what we want. The sufferings of this world, though very real and painful, do not define us or remain our focus. Setting our minds on God and His Kingdom, fills our hearts with joy, no matter what we face.

In Christ we’ve been made complete. Our deep inner longings, placed in our hearts by Father God, are completely satisfied in Christ. In Christ Jesus, we are completely forgiven, completely loved, completely valued and completely satisfied. In Him, we lack nothing.

Prayer

Lord, Wow! When I ponder these amazing truths about me being in You, it’s beyond belief. But You say it’s true and I trust You. Please help me not to loose sight of these facts as my days get busy and hard. When I’m tempted to try and make life work out for me in my own flesh, please remind me to put off my old self and walk in You, my Life. When I get caught up with the smaller story of how circumstances work out for me, please remind me there’s a greater, much more important story going on; Your story.

When a feel the nagging emptiness of measuring my life by temporal values, please remind me that in You I’m complete. When I’m tempted to live life apart from You, please remind me quickly that I’m in You. Thank you Lord. Amen.

Personal Study

Highlight II Corinthians 5:17-21

Explain it in your own words

Apply it to your life

Respond to God in prayer 

 [1] Union with Christ, Rankin Wilborne, David Cooke 2016, p. 13

[2] Union with Christ, ibid p. 53

[3] Romans 8:29

[4] I Peter 4:11

[5] Psalm 37:4

[6] Pensées, Blaise Pascal (Published in 1670 after his death)

[7] Siri Dictionary

Previous posts in the UP series:

Amazing Love

Essential Love

What Hides God’s Love

Christ Lives in Me

.Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 Novels by the Author:

Beyond Time

Hope Remains

Strengthening our Faith, When God seems Distant

Our Highest Joy (Mustering Our Faith) (Republished In the Moments)

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Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand (Isaiah 41:10 NASB)

It doesn’t take a pandemic and a nation marred in disunity to render us faint at heart. Life can be discouraging even without that stuff.

 And when we get a full dose and need to pause to catch our breath, life keeps on coming at us. To remain courageous, we must muster our faith.

Muster – to assemble troops as for a battle, to gather, to summon, to rouse

On a regular basis, we have repeated opportunities to gather and summon our faith. Like workouts in the gym, rousing our trust, when things aren’t smooth, builds muscle memory and strengthens our faith.

How do we muster our faith when we feel weak and God seems distant? Following are a few musts.

We Must Remember God’s Sovereignty

God is always in control. His purposes can’t be thwarted. He’s able to work all things together for His greater purposes.[1] Even the very hard situations we face are no surprise to God. In His omnipotence, the sinful choices by men, the state of this fallen world and the schemes of the enemy can not change what God is doing.

Joseph told his brothers, “And as for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present result, to preserve many people alive.”[2]  

God used Jonah’s disobedience to illicit praise from the folks on the ship to Tarashish.[3]

The evil intent of the Jewish leaders to kill Jesus led to the salvation of all men.

God has entrusted us with each circumstance we’re in and desires us to trust Him and not our own understanding of our situations.[4]

We Must Orient Our Lives from God’s Greater Story

Paul tells believers that since we have been raised up with Christ, we’re to set our minds on things above, not on things of the earth.[5]

We need to see our lives from an eternal perspective, knowing God is at work for our greater good. He’s working all things for the purpose of conforming us into the image of Christ, not for us to experience a smooth ride.[6] It’s vital for us to understand this. If not, we can view God as a distant dictator, out to destroy our hopes and dreams.

We need to live now with the end in mind. Being more like Christ is what this life is about, not temporal happiness. For we died and our life is now hidden in Christ.[7]

We Must Realize Being with God is Our Highest Joy

The Bible has an overarching theme, woven into the fabric from Genesis to Revelation. Us being with God. We were created for fellowship with Him.

David, wrote that even in the shadow of death, he would not be afraid because He knew God was with him.[8] He also wrote that in God’s presence, joy is full.[9]

 After crying out to God concerning the unfairness of life, Asaph concluded that God’s nearness was his good, not his lot in life.[10]

From a Roman prison Paul repeatedly instructed us to be full of joy in the Lord. Not just when we feel like it, but at all times.[11]

We Must Remember God’s Love for us Never Fails

No matter how often we fall short in actions and faith, God’s love for us never fails, it’s everlasting.[12] His lovingkindness never ceases. His mercies are new every morning.[13]

 As believers, we are His children, a fact established before the world began.[14] Nothing can separate us from His great love.[15] His love for us can be described as deeper and wider and longer than an ocean and higher than the heavens. It surpasses our ability to comprehend.[16]

Prayer

Lord, we come to You now. You know the place we’re in. You’re not surprised by any of it. You’re with us and have allowed it for our greater good. Help us not to doubt Your ways. May we draw near to You and walk in utter dependence upon You. We were never to face these things alone. We depend upon Your strength in our weakness. Amen.

“And He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”[17] The Apostle Paul

[1] Ephesians 1:9-12

[2] Genesis 50:20 (NASB)

[3] Jonah 1:14-16

[4] Proverbs 3:5-6

[5] Colossians 3:1-2

[6] Romans 8:28-29

[7] Colossians 3:3

[8] Psalm 23:4

[9] Psalm 16:11b

[10] Psalm 73, 73:28

[11] Philippians 3:1, 4:4

[12] Jeremiah 31:3

[13] Lamentations 3:22-23

[14] Ephesians 1:4-5

[15] Romans 8:35

[16] Ephesians 3:14-19

[17] 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Previous posts in the series – Our Highest Joy:

Unmasking the Lie

Dealing with sadness and disappointment

Eternal Thanksgiving

Fueled by the Joy of Jesus

God with Us

Fixing Our Hope

Remaining Cheerful

Not My Will

.Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 Novels by the Author:

Beyond Time

Hope Remains