Tag Archives: Light in the midst of grief

God of all Comfort

Our Highest Joy (Dealing with Sadness and Disappointment)

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Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For just as the sufferings of Christ are ours in abundance, so also our comfort is abundant through Christ (II Corinthians 1:3-5 NASB).

Guarded Heart

I first saw my father drunk when my mother wasn’t at home. I was around ten years old and the oldest child. When I saw him stagger and fall, I couldn’t process the emotions. I felt numb. A few years later his drinking would cost him his job, his marriage and almost his life.

A trusted counselor once told me the armor I used to guard my heart as a kid served me well, but I’ve outgrown it now. I needed to learn how to explore and process some ancient pain. But I wasn’t really sure how.

The Difference Between Sadness and Disappointment

One of the characters in a novel I’m reading mentioned being disappointed with God. I don’t attribute my disappointment with God, but I do recognize the feeling of disappointment and wonder how it differs from sadness.

Research tells me sadness implies grieving something we’ve had and lost. Disappointment deals with the lost of the hope of something. The distinction seems helpful in sorting through some of the feelings of loss I still need to deal with.

Jesus is our Highest Joy, but Emotional Pain Shouldn’t be Ignored  

Our Highest Joy (Unmasking the Lie)

Though, as children of God, we’re hopefully growing in our heartfelt understanding that He Himself is what gives us lasting fulfillment, satisfaction and happiness, dealing with our emotional pain is very important. Exploring old wounds and freeing captured parts of our hearts can free us to enjoy the presence of the Lord more authentically.

In a recent journal entry, this is what I sense God was saying to me concerning my emotional pain: Don’t deny the sadness and disappointments in your life. Keep bringing it all to me. The old ones, the new ones. There’s hurt, but like light and salt heal physical wounds, there’s freedom and healing when you call Me near. I’m the God of all comfort. I want to bind every crevice of your broken heart with the Joy of My presence. To the extent you allow My Oil of Gladness in to soften and soothe your pain, true compassion will grow. And as the more hidden places in your heart are brought to My Life and Light, the more you’ll experience the Joy of us being together.

Challenge

Do you have sadness or disappointment which has caused or is causing great grief? Bring an especially painful one to mind. Have you denied the gravity of how this has affected you?  Have you minimized the impact to your own detriment and to the harm of others?

Though accessing this great pain may take your breath away, it may be time to unlock, deep crusted over parts of your heart, long ago abandoned. Ask Jesus to draw near. He is near to the broken hearted.[1]

Prayer

Lord, thank you for showing me how important it is to call you near in my sadness and disappointment. Thank you for showing me that denying my deep emotional pain is not what you intend. Some of these losses are extremely hard. My heart and eyes still sting when I embrace the magnitude of hurt and loss. But You are my Life. These feelings are not a surprise to you, Jesus. Isaiah described you as a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief.[2] You know my inner most parts. You knit me together.[3]

Amen.

Epilogue

Within hours after writing this, as I invited the Lord into deeper layers of my own sadness and disappointment, a sense of undefined discouragement began to creep in. This feeling lasted over a day. I felt zapped of strength, with little motivation to perform life’s normal duties. I’ve been told this mood is common-place for some folks. It’s rare for me and gives me an appreciation for those who battle depression.

Though I didn’t feel it, I clung desperately to what God says about His love for me. The next day, the cloud began to lift. I’m learning to believe God’s love and hold on to it, even when I don’t understand it or feel it.

The Lord appeared to him long ago, saying, “I have loved you with an everlasting love; Therefore I have drawn you out with kindness (Jeremiah 31:3 NASB).

My father came to saving faith in Jesus Christ later in life. Though he struggled with his alcoholism even after his conversion, his eventual total dependence upon the Lord with his drinking problem led to sober living the last fifteen years of his life. Dad’s story

[1] Psalm 34:18

[2] Isaiah 53:3

[3] Psalm 139:13

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

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 Novels by the Author:

Beyond Time

Hope Remains

Fighting for Joy, Transforming Joy

Fighting Discouragement

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Been fighting discouragement all day, a general oppressive mood. I’m a IT instructor, so I can’t check my mind at the door and fully deal with how I’m feeling, I have to keep going. However, I’m learning to acknowledge my feelings and not just stuff them. This process is new for me and I’m not always sure how to proceed. However, it’s adding richness to my life and helping me understand who I really am.

Digging deeper, I recognize my disheartened mood stems from sadness. People I love are  hurting. Their pain grieves me.

“Lord, is there anything I can do?”

I feel helpless to help.

The day moves on. No one knows my sadness. Outwardly, I lay out the material and field the questions. I care about my students. So, this keeps me engaged.

The day comes to an end. On the drive home,  I begin to tend to my feelings. I realize this discouragement is an attack upon my heart, the well spring of my life.

I remember the French word for heart is “cour,” yielding our word “courage”. This dis-couragement I’m feeling threatens my courage.

I decide to preach good news to myself:

These present circumstances are not worthy to be compared to the glories which await me in Christ Jesus.[1]

Jesus loves me as much as God the Father loves Him.[2]

My Lord is  God of all comfort, who sooths my heart with His nearness.[3]

Jesus Christ indwells me by His Holy Spirit.  Mine is to depend upon Him for every word and deed. [4]

In spite of these circumstances, I can experience full joy in God’s presence.[5]

This sadness can be considered a good thing, if it draws me into deeper dependence upon Christ. [6]

Bringing these feelings to God, and trusting Him in them, purifies my soul and leads to joy unspeakable and full of glory.[7]

I died and Christ is now my life. My affections are on Him and His desires.   [8]

My goodness is not dependent on how things are going or how I feel. God’s nearness is my good.[9]

Truth stirs my heart. Courage wells up. God’s life within begins to relieve my pain.

Prayer:  Wow.   Lord, you are transforming my heart by the sweetness of your truth. Your words are honey to my soul. My circumstances have not changed, but you have given me renewed vigor. You have filled my soul with gladness, more than when their grain and new wine abound. I praise you my Father, my King.

 

[1] Romans 8:18

[2] John 15:9

[3] 2 Corinthians 1:3-5

[4] Galatians 2:20

[5] Psalm 16:11

[6] James 1:2-4

[7] I Peter 1:6-9

[8] Colossians 3:1-4

[9] Psalm 73:28

The Lord is my Light, The Lord is Near

Son Shine

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A few Sundays ago, at the beach, a few of us woke up early to see the sunrise. I was a bit demotivated at first, especially since we were on vacation, but my son in law convinced us it would be well worth it.

“I walked out onto a sandbar about a quarter of a mile,” he said, speaking of his adventure the previous morning.

So, when my phone chimed around 6 am, I quietly dressed and headed down to our rendezvous spot. A faint tinge of light was beginning to illuminate the eastern sky as we walked the block and a half down to the beach. When we reached the sand, we slipped off our shoes and headed east.

An orange band hugged the horizon, topped by a pale yellow patch, slowing replacing the night’s darkness, already taking on a light blue hue.

After walking a few hundred yards we turned right ninety degrees and waded toward the middle of the ocean. Walking on a sand bar, we kept going until looking back, the houses on the beach were distant silhouettes. It was breath taking. My son-in-law was not exaggerating. It was truly magical.

When the first rays of the sun broke through, we were all captivated by God’s splendor.

Several weeks have passed since our early morning adventure and I determined last night to greet the sun again. I’m several hours from the ocean, but live half a mile from a large lake. Using my StarTracker app, I determined where the sun would rise over the lake and was waiting in my convertible with coffee and journal in hand. As the sun rose, I wanted to praise the Lord for His new day sun.

But I saw no sun. The sky brightened, but only with lighter shades of grey. The eastern sky was covered with clouds. I would see no sunrise, but was determined to still praise my God for His beauties.

When I returned home, I pulled out a camping chair and enjoyed the crispness of the morning air. Sipping on my coffee it occurred to me that even though I saw no sun, the Son still shines.

Sometimes my days can seem totally grey. Hard times can block the light of my Lord’s nearness. What a great reminder!

God’s light always shines, even when I can’t see it.

“I am the Light of the world; he who follows Me will not walk in the darkness, but will have the Light of life.” John 4:18

His word lights my way.

“Your word is a lamp to my feet And a light to my path.” Psalm 119:105

With God, there is no darkness. “This is the message we have heard from Him and announce to you, that God is Light, and in Him there is no darkness at all.” I John 1:5

I have been called out into the Lord’s wonderful light. “But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a Holy Nation, a people for God’s own possession, so that you may proclaim the excellences of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light;”  I Peter 2:19

When I was a young believer, we would sing a Song about the Lord being our Light, based on the following verses from Psalm 27:

The Lord is my light and my salvation;
Whom shall I fear?

The Lord is the defense of my life;
Whom shall I dread?

When evildoers came upon me to devour my flesh,
My adversaries and my enemies, they stumbled and fell.

Though a host encamp against me,
My heart will not fear;
Though war arise against me,
In spite of this I shall be confident.

One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I shall seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
To behold the beauty of the Lord
And to meditate in His temple.

Prayer: Lord, thank you. You’ve shown me, even on this cloudy day, Your light shines brightly. You are Light. In You I have no fear. Bring light into every crevice of my heart. Light my way I pray, that I might follow Your path for my life. Please give me the peace of your presence, even when all around me is dark and evil. Though I walk in the shadows, I will not fear for you are always with me.

One Thing! Lord, you are my Light.  May my one overwhelming desire be to remain in Your presence and gaze upon Your beauties, even in the midst of my cloudy days.

Amen.