Tag Archives: God’s love

Since I didn’t have to be at work until later that day, Alfred and I continued discussing the dream until 9:30. He found it encouraging too. Through our conversation, we established some daily routines:

As much as possible, begin each day with unhurried time with God
Talk with Him about who we know we’ll be encountering that day and ask Him to allow us, through His Sprit, to love each person, planned or not, with the same quality of love He loves us
Be prayerfully intentional about loving and leading our families, especially our wives
Be deliberate about being present during the moments of the day
Don’t look past people in order to return to duties
Continually cast each responsibility and care upon the Lord and trust Him to weed out what’s unnecessary
Orient our lives from the fact that we’ve been raised with Christ and are, even now, seated in heavenly places with Him
Find our joy and satisfaction in the Lord, not our circumstances and accomplishments
See each moment from an eternal perspective, being bold to explain our hope in Christ and to announce the Lord’s great mercy towards us

A Hundred Days Later

As much as I wanted it, the dream on the packages never returned, but the impression it made has grown stronger.

Alfred and I agreed to meet weekly to support each other in our daily routines. We weren’t perfect, but we managed to have unhurried times of solitude with Father God at least five times during most weeks.

We began our times along with God by praising Him, acknowledging His presence, and listening for His guidance. Although we didn’t follow the same Bible reading plan, due to different programs in our churches, we always shared at least one impactful truth from God’s word to uplift each other during our weekly breakfasts.

Aware of whom we might encounter each day, we established a rhythm of morning prayers and spontaneous prayers throughout the day. We sought to remain in Jesus’ love, relying on the Holy Spirit to help us love others with the same depth of love He has for us.

Additionally, we encouraged one another to create margin in our lives for unforeseen chances to show God’s lovingkindness.

We extended grace to each other when we fell short and ended each time in prayer.

Alfred excelled in the practice of being present throughout the day. He endeavored to employ all his senses while performing his duties as an administrative assistant at a large law firm. Whenever someone entered his office space, be it in person or electronically via phone, text, or email, he sought divine guidance on how to fully engage and serve each “customer”. He admitted that initially, it was challenging, and there were times he went half a day without a thought of God. However, he persisted, and during those gaps He thanked God when He was brought again to an awareness of His presence. Then he resolved to concentrate on maintaining his focus on Jesus as often as he could going forward,

I was more irregular in my practice of abiding, but Alfred’s encouragement led me to increasingly and consciously surrender to the Holy Spirit of God within me multiple times a day.

Passing it On

One morning, Alfred couldn’t hide his huge grin as Tammy, our regular waitress, poured our coffee. Tammy must be the finest server in the South. Alfred and I alternate paying for our weekly breakfasts, always leaving her generous tips. As a single mother and now a grandmother, she’s familiar with our routine and usual breakfast bowls, to the extent that, by 6:30 every Wednesday morning, our table was waiting for us and our condiments already laid out.

“Tammy,” Alfred said, as she finished pouring my coffee. “Set us up for four next week.”

“Okay,” she said with a smile. “The usual?”

We both nodded. Occasionally one of us will be enticed to go with chicken fried steak, eggs, grits or hashbrowns and grilled biscuits. But that usually happened when the other was paying.

When Tammy had gone, I asked Alfred what was up with the table for four.

“Apprenticeship,” Alfred began, “What if you wanted to become a bricklayer? And you knew of a master who had been a successful bricklayer for years and years. What would you do first to learn how to follow his path?”

I thought for moment and then replied. “First, I’d want to be with him as much as possible during the workday to watch him, learning to become like him in his brick laying methods.”

“Great answer,” Alfred replied, his grin getting even larger. “Then what?”

“Eventually, I’d begin laying brick on my own doing what he did.”

“Exactly!” Alfred said, as Tammy brought our bowls and refilled our coffee. “And that’s the answer to your question.”

“What question?” I asked as I poured white pepper gravy on my bowl and passed the deliciousness to Alfred.

“Your question of why I asked Tammy to set four places next week,” Alfred answered. “You and I have been intentional about being with Jesus alone and meeting together to talk about our experiences. By the power of the Holy Spirit, we’ve sought to be like Jesus, praying for each other along the way.

“We’ve sought to follow Him as His disciples. I believe the next step in our apprenticeship is to do what He’s taught us to do to others. [2]

“I have a young man I work with who recently decided to believe in Christ’s finished work for his salvation. And I’d like to ask him to join us, if you’re okay with that.”

“Sure,” I answered. “But what about me? Who could I ask?”

“How about your son?”

[1] John 15: 9-12

Joy in the Journey is about the

gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading.

Nonfiction books by the Author:

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.
For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for? Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Please Check out the Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Turning the To-Do List on its Head

Packages (The Dream Ends)

August 31, 2024 robuck4@aol.com Leave a comment

Then I awoke, not on the packages, but in my own bedroom. Beside me, my wife, whose name isn’t Jill, was still sleeping. I’d experienced a lucid dream spanning a week, yet in reality, it was only a few hours.

It was predawn. I dressed, brewed a cup of Cuban coffee and proceeded to the porch, my favorite place to watch the sun rise.

I took out my journal and detailed the events and individuals from the seven days encompassed by the dream. The scenarios and characters were fictitious. However, some elements were familiar.

I don’t have a neighbor named Alice. Nevertheless, I’ve engaged in discussions with colleagues, in my field of IT, about Jesus and Him not being religious.

I don’t have a friend named Fred suffering from pancreatic cancer, but I do have several close friends who are facing serious illnesses.

I don’t have friends named Sammy and Milly with a son named Alton, but I wish I did.

I don’t have a co-worker named Kevin facing personal challenges and showing interest in my faith. However, I do work closely with someone I pray will stop believing God and science can’t co-exist.

I don’t have colleagues like Harrison and Mike who desire to inflict as much pain on me as possible, but I have a person, who is closer than a co-worker, who seems to have that agenda.

As the sun started to tint the grey sky with soft pastels, I jotted down the themes that came to me while I rested on the packages.

During the seven days of dreams, as I listened to His voice, I learned:

To love others as Christ loves me
To converse with God, who is ever-present, and to listen as I go
That He will guide me in loving each person He places in my path
To fully “see” people around me and not quickly move past people to the next obligation
To yield to His kindness as I love
That my life is brimming with the abundant grace of God
That I am appointed as an ambassador of Christ to convey His grace
To always be prepared to discuss the Hope of Christ within me
That difficulties, such as Fred’s cancer, are not surprises to God
To recall God’s love for me during tough times
Not to gauge my happiness by my circumstances
That individuals like Alton, with special needs, bring extraordinary joy
When I seek comfort from God, He endows me with joy and courage
That I possess no righteousness of my own, only the righteousness of Christ

By then the sun was in full view and I knew exactly what I needed to do. I called my spiritual mentor, Alfred. He agreed to meet me for breakfast.

After ordering our usual bowls of grits, poached eggs, crumbled bacon, and biscuits, I shared the dream with him. Confident in his wisdom, I believed he could provide some meaningful insights.

I also shared with him the notes I’d written earlier that morning.

He was patient as I recounted my story, asking a few clarifying questions. Afterwards, I asked him for his overall thoughts and possible interpretation.

Alfred paused a moment, then said, “Your times on the packages seem like a picture of our position in the heavenlies with Christ. The timeless dawn, vivid colors, and what I’m calling an ocean of love, give me a sense of what heaven must be like. I had goose bumps as I listened.

“Reminds me of verses like Colossians 3:1-4, and Ephesians 2:4-7 where it speaks of believers being raised with Christ and seated with Him in heavenly places. Your dream gave me a glimpse of being with Christ in heaven, yet still living on earth.

“This is a real gift, Bobby. You’ve been given an eternal peek into our heavenly position, an almost “real life” perspective of what Paul meant when he commanded us to set our minds on things above, not on temporal things. [1]

“What do you think the packages represent?” he asked.

“At first, I thought it was up to me to deliver them all, I responded. “That speaks to how full of duties my life feels. I can be so busy that people, and opportunities to love, can seemed like obstacles to taming the task list. But now I’m realizing much of my to-do list is from me and not God.

“Those packages are not tasks, they’re bundles of God’s love: His kindness, His peace, His joy, His presence to be given as presents to others.

“Though I’m very saddened at how I’ve been, I can hear you tell me that God’s mercies are new every morning.”

Alfred nodded.

My eyes began to sting as I continued, “Alfred, I’ve waisted so much of my life striving to fill a bottomless chasm in my heart that screams – ‘I’m not enough.’

“Though in my head, I’ve known it’s about Christ’s righteousness, my heart hasn’t caught up yet. It believed it was up to me to earn His love, to succeed, to please.

“Until now,” I said, a spark of joy rising in my heart. “Because of the gift of a dream, my whole world has been turned upside down.

“Alfred, you’ve patiently loved me and guided me all these years. You know how distracted I’ve been.”

Alfred smiled and nodded.

“This dream has turned my to-do list on its head. My duties are no longer the main thing. My goal now is to love.

“I feel so much more present. I want to truly see the Sammys God brings my way and not just pass them by to check off another task on my never-ending task list.

“No! Completing my tasks without problems is no longer my main goal. Delivering God’s daily packages of love is what I want to be about.

“I’ll trust Him to get done what needs to get done. The tasks are now simply the paths God uses to bring me to the folks He wants me to love.”

Alfred laughed with joy. I knew at that moment it’s what he’d been praying for me all these years.

Stay Tuned for The Epilogue, Walking it Out.

[1] Colossians 3:1-4

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading.

Nonfiction books by the Author:

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for? Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Please Check out the Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Rest

Packages (Part 7)

August 11, 2024 robuck4@aol.com 2 Comments

The next morning on the packages the events of the previous day swirled in my soul. I checked with Kevin after Alice’s party, and he predicted the batches would be completed by early evening.

Alice’s party was hard for me. I’m not a good chit-chatter with folks I don’t know very well. I did have a good conversation with one of Alice’s grandson’s Jeff, who’s studying Computer Science at the University of South Carolina.

His eye’s widened when I told him about carrying around punch cards for writing COBOL programs back in the late 70s. Things have changed so much Jeff wasn’t even sure what COBOL was.

“It stands for Common Business Oriented Language,” I explained. “It was developed by Admiral Grace Hopper. COBOL emerged 1959. and it’s still used a lot today in banking, insurance, and other large data industries.”

As I shared my enthusiasm about computing history with Jeff, I could see his eyes beginning to glaze over. I shifted the conversation and asked some questions about him.

Then he surprised me, “Granny says you’re a religious person, is that right?”

Simultaneously, I heard. “Be very real.”

“Actually, I’m not, Jeff.”

I could tell my answer took him back. I was ready to say more, but heard, “Wait. Give him space to process and respond.”

After a moment, he said, “But I thought you went to church a lot.”

“I do, but that doesn’t make me religious,” I replied. “Growing up, I saw religious people as judgmental, fun zapping and stuffy, so I avoided them.”

“I don’t understand,” Jeff replied. “How can you go to church and avoid religious people?”

I went on to explain that religion is following rules, Christianity is following a Person, Jesus Christ. I told him there are two ways to get to heaven; be perfect or be carried in by Someone who is.

He seemed very interested and asked a lot of questions, especially about what Christ’s crucifixion really meant.

I gave him some passages to read and showed him how to get the Bible app on his phone. He was amazed when I told him how Jesus was not a religious person either.

“In fact,” I said. “Take a look at Matthew 23:1-12. You’ll see how angry Jesus was at the religious leaders of his time. They were all about rule following, not God following.”

It was a nice conversation, but I had a restless night thinking about all that was going on.

As I continued to think about the day before, I heard Him say, “Rest. Bobby, you are worried and bothered by many things,”

Recognizing that these were the words, Jesus said to Martha in Luke 10:38-42, I responded, “But only one thing is needed.”

In the story of the two sisters, I’d always identified with the busy older sister, named Martha. But I’d longed to be like Mary, who sat at Jesus’ feet listening to His words.

Mary cared more about Jesus than accomplishments.

I wanted to be like Mary, but I was much more like Martha.

“You can be like Mary, but you must trust Me deeply,” He responded to my thoughts.

How?

“To be like Mary, thoughts of yourself must end; thoughts of doing, thoughts of pleasing, thoughts of measuring up must be replaced by trust; trust in what My Son did on the cross. He did it all for you. He brought you back from annihilation. He freed you. He completed you. He is worth all your attention.

When you do, He’ll take care of everything else.”

He said no more that morning.

Later, Sammy and Milly joined us for church. The sermon was on Psalm 27, particularly verse 4.

Again, I would hear about “one thing.”

One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I shall seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
To behold the beauty of the Lord
And to meditate in His temple.

“How’d you like the sermon,” Jill asked Sammy and Milly, as we enjoyed our lunch at Lizard’s Thicket after church.

“I liked the focus on worship,” Sammy replied.

“Yes,” Milly chimed in. “Could life really be as simple as the one thing of worshipping God? What about all the things we have to do? We can’t just forget about them.”

“I’ve thought the same thing,” Jill added. “I was reading about this verse in a book about worshiping. The author mentioned that David’s one thing of desiring God above everything else was the mainspring for everything else in his life, his commanding, his ruling, his writing, everything.” [1]

“Wow, that makes a lot of sense,” said Sammy. “That softens the conflict in my head. Like the story of Mary and Martha and how Jesus told Martha that one thing is needed.”

I couldn’t believe what was happening. The very thing I heard on the packages that morning, was playing out before my eyes in a deep conversation. I was about to mention the packages for the first time to anyone, when my phone vibrated.

Glancing at my watch, I saw it was Kevin.

“Excuse me,” I said. “I need to take this.”

As I stepped outside and answered the phone, I heard, “Rest.”

“You okay,” I asked.

“Not at all,” Kevin exclaimed tersely. “I knew you were at church and wanted to be sure our process was still going. On my way in, I passed Mike driving away. I don’t think he saw me.

“When I got upstairs, the server was off. When I rebooted, I was able to restart the remaining batches. But the abrupt termination of the one which was running has corrupted a large block of data. And it was for the new client.”

I tried to console Kevin, but he came unglued. He was going to resigned on the spot, but I told to hold on until I got there

To Be Continued

[1] How to worship Jesus Christ by Joseph S. Carrol, pages 22-26

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading.

Nonfiction books by the Author:

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for? Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Please Check out the Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

The Righteousness of God

Packages (Part 6)

July 11, 2024 robuck4@aol.com Leave a comment

Dear reader, Packages is an allegory. There will be roughly a dozen parts before Bobby wakes up from a very long, lifelike dream. He'll then seek an interpretation.

I found myself on the packages again on Saturday, with no body of water in sight. I sat deep in a valley, surrounded by towering piles of boxes. The rising sun remained hidden from view; its presence only hinted at by the pastel hues of dawn. The location matched my mood.

The sobering events of the previous day made me cringe as they seeped into my groggy consciousness. As troubling as the work situation was, I was more concerned about not being reconciled with Jill. Over the years, we’d learned to navigate through difficulties, particularly when one could sense the other’s reaction stemmed from unresolved past hurts. Together, with faith in God, we’d learned to reveal and dismantle the longstanding falsehoods that had troubled our lives. It was rare for us to sleep without settling our differences and kissing. The previous night was particularly challenging because we both reacted from deep-seated pain and failed to extend grace before the day’s end. I knew it was my responsibility to lead in that regard, but I hadn’t.

I recalled His words that the packages were brimming with kindness, grace, and love—qualities I desperately needed to embrace the day ahead. Accepting His grace proved particularly challenging. Especially in light of how I’d failed to lead Jill and, with my growing unforgiveness and bitterness with Mike.

Even so, I was certain nothing could separate me from God’s love, not even my own shame.

I contemplated the Hebrew word “Hesed,” which translates to lovingkindness.

And Psalm 23 verse 6: Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

I recalled that this word embodies a divine love which transcends human understanding; like how God pursues us, in spite of our disobedience. Like how Hosea pursued Gomer, his harlot wife. [1]

Immersed in a deep awareness of His lovingkindness, my heart grew tender. I longed to embrace Jill and admit my mistake. We never do well when we’re not right with each other.

“There’s something else in these boxes,” He said, again catching me off guard. “You’re absorbing more than just kindness, grace and love.”

“Read II Corinthians 5:21.”

I picked up the Bible resting on the box in front of me and read, He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.

“Can you guess what else you’ve been soaking in?” He asked.

“The righteousness of Christ Jesus?”

“Very good. Can that righteousness be diminished by anything you do or don’t do?”

I paused a moment before answering. A new understanding was budding in my heart. “No. Since You chose me, by Your mercy, to be Your son before I was even born, nothing I do or don’t do can affect it. Right?”

“That’s right,” He said. “My children know this, but our enemy is relentless in seeking to hide My grace and love. His efforts are multiplied as his end draws near. Bobby, sometimes you still soak in his lies and not My truth”

“What did Paul say about righteousness in Ephesians 6?”

“He told us to put on the breastplate of righteousness, as we gird our loins with truth and take up the shield of faith.” I felt faith rising and continued. “This allows us to extinguish all the flaming missiles of the evil one. All of them!”

“Never drop your shield of faith. Believe you have My righteousness. No matter what happens, stay the course.”

Having rekindled my faith, He left me to my reflections. The shame I felt now appeared absurd. I knew my life was meant to be rooted in His righteousness, not my own. I realized that whenever I lost focus on this truth, I was on shacky ground and very vulnerable.

Unbeknownst to me, I was no longer in a valley; the mound of packages I rested on had ascended beyond the horizon. I was now in full view of a crystal blue sea, which reflected the magnificence of the eternal dawn.

Jill and I were able to have a cup of coffee together before I went to the office. I apologized for acting out of my fear of failure and need to succeed. I also told her I was sorry for not initiating forgiveness the night before.

“I forgive you on both counts,” she said, as we hugged. “I’m not sure I was ready to be resolved last night anyway. I was stewing in my own feelings of rejection. But I recognized this morning that these lies are ancient. I’m sorry too. God has used you to help me see the lies from the past I still tend to live in.”

“I’m glad,” I said. “Us honoring our covenant of marriage before God has been what’s held us together and allowed our love to grow. We’ve had some very hard stretches.”

She agreed.

As I entered the office, I heard, “Ask Me.”

I found Kevin at his desk, his head in his hands, same shirt on from the day before. “The batches of data are two large,” he said in a defeated tone when he noticed me. “I tried dividing them into smaller datasets, but they lose the associated header, footer and provider tags. I’m out of ideas.”

I’d never seen Kevin in such a state. His perseverance and determination were remarkable, but he was clearly at the end of his rope.

Remembering His message, I asked Him for guidance. Then I ran through different possibilities in my mind.

“I have an idea,” I said after a few minutes. “I think I can use Easytrieve, a mainframe programming tool, to generate smaller datasets while preserving the tags. This would mean we’d be handling smaller batches during the data transfer and the script processing.”

Kevin thought it was a good idea and assisted me in mapping the fields. In forty-five minutes, we’d successfully written a quick program and validated the theory with a batch of data which had previously abended.

“Eureka!” Kevin exclaimed. We did a computer nerd version of a high five.

We kicked off a batch of scripts, which we hoped would process all the data by early Sunday afternoon. He showed me how to check for problems in his script and how to monitor the progress remotely.

I sent him home to rest and made sure the first few batches were successful.

When I got home, Jill was wrapping Alice’s surprise birthday gift.

The plan was for us to distract Alice in the backyard while friends and family streamed into her house to surprise her.

“I can hide her present in the bottom of my purse,” Jill exclaimed.

“I knew that giant bag would come in handy for something,” I joked, earning me a playful elbow to the ribs.

I was so excited about our gift to Alice. Knowing his days on earth were winding down, her husband, Ray, had asked me to video a message to his family. Jill and I downloaded it to an electronic picture frame, which was our present to Alice and their kids.

Right before we knocked on the back door, my phone vibrated with a text. Jill heard it too and looked at me with disappointment.

“Is it work?” she exclaimed bitterly.

The extensive time and mental energy I devoted to work-related activities over the years had become a longstanding source of pain and feelings of neglect for Jill. I endeavored to understand my wife better, continually learning more about her. I was beginning to realize that some of her reactions stemmed from deep-seated pain, some of which originated in her childhood and was triggered by something I did, said, or failed to do. While I acknowledge that I have also caused her pain, I was learning not to take it personally all the time. This approach helped me to remain non-defensive, at least some of the time. Which is hard for a guy like me who thrives to succeed and please people.

“No, it’s Sammy,” I replied, also happy it wasn’t work related. “He’s asking if he and his family can join us at our church tomorrow.”

“Wow! That would be great,” Jill exclaimed. “Alton as well?”

“I’m not sure,” I replied, as I knocked on Alice’s back door. I heard, “Be bold.“

To Be Continued

[1] The book of Hosea

Please Check out the Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading.

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for? Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Addiction to Pleasing People

Pleasing Pop

November 17, 2023 robuck4@aol.com 1 Comment

My first year of Little League was a bust. I couldn’t connect with even an eleven-year-old fastball. Though our team won the championship, I felt like a worthless hindrance. By obligation, Coach Goodnight would send me to the plate, once every game or so, to take my three swings and sit down.

I felt like giving up, but I loved baseball. During the offseason, I spent a lot of time working on my eye hand coordination and improving my bat speed.

When I showed up for tryouts the following year, I imagine Coach Goodnight couldn’t have been thrilled to see me. But, to my delight, my training paid off. I could connect on pitches, even from a twelve-year-old. And, since I was a decent fielder, I was assigned the role of starting second baseman.

One Saturday morning, as we warmed up for one of our home games, I saw that Pop, my paternal grandfather, had joined my mother in the stands. This delighted me and I especially wanted to play well for him.

There were runners on first and second base when I came to bat for my first plate appearance. I can still picture the details in my mind, over fifty years later. I swung hard at the first pitch. It was a bit outside, so being a righthanded batter, the ball lined between the first and second basemen, heading for the fence. As I rounded first base, I decided to keep running past second and head for third. I slid in ahead of the tag for a triple, driving in two runs.

It wasn’t a Mickey Mantle home run, but I couldn’t have been more excited. When the dust cleared and I stood on third base, I looked up into the crowd and singled out Pop. He had a huge grin on his face, wildly clapping. He was proud of me.

People Pleasing

As I think back on that moment and others like it, I see how important it is for us to please those we care about. As children, parental acceptance and love is important, but we can easily equate our performance with our value. After all, we learn from an early age how our achievements bring us favor. Passing marks in school mean we get promoted to the next grade. Doing well during tryouts earns us a part in the play. Obeying our parents keeps us from being punished.

It’s easy to conclude that what we do determines how much we’re loved. But this is in direct contradiction to the good news of Jesus Christ. Paul said some very stern things to the Galatians about their tendencies to follow a “gospel” of works righteousness, especially for the purpose of people pleasing.

As we have said before, even now I say again: if anyone is preaching to you a gospel contrary to what you received, he is to be accursed!

For am I now seeking the favor of people, or of God? Or am I striving to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ (Galatians 1:9-10 NASB).

Focused

We’re to live Godly lives but not to earn affection. Only God’s approval is necessary. Our right standing with God is based on what Christ has done, not on anything we could ever accomplish. [1]

Jesus modeled a life of setting aside His own will and living only to please his Father [2]. This focus freed Him from being bound by the actions and opinions of men. Resting in His Father’s love, Jesus freely and lovingly washed Judas and Peter’s feet, men who would betray and deny Him. [3]

Jesus was fully aware of God’s great love for Him, so He didn’t need to depend on the opinions of men. And neither do we.

But Jesus, on His part, was not entrusting Himself to them, because He knew all people, and because He did not need anyone to testify about mankind, for He Himself knew what was in mankind (John 2:24-25 NASB).

As Christians, we’ve been adopted into God’s family as His children [4]. Were hidden in Christ Jesus [5], united with Him. In Christ, we please God already.

and those who are in the flesh cannot please God. However, you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you (Romans 8:8-9a NASB).

As believers, we’re left with a huge paradigm shift. We must leave behind our dependence upon others for approval. We live now only to please our Father God. And, as we rest in Christ, His life in us is what pleases God.

We get to set aside all worries of what people think of us and live every moment for our Audience of One.

Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord and not for people, knowing that it is from the Lord that you will receive the reward of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ whom you serve (Colossians 3:23-24 NASB).

Prayer

Lord, as I picture Pop smiling and cheering me on that day so many years ago, I remember that You delight in me even more than he did. [6] Help me to rest in Your love and acceptance, no matter how folks treat me. I trust in You alone. I release my addiction to worrying about what people think of me.

I know I can’t successfully focus on You without You. Help me never to depend upon any human for my well-being. May I continually trust in You alone.

Please keep me focused on You throughout each day. When I stray from living only for You, please remind me quickly.

Amen.

One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I shall seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
To behold the beauty of the Lord
And to^]meditate in His temple (Psalm 27:4 NASB)

[1] II Corinthians 5:21, Ephesians 2:4-7

[2] John 5:30

[3] John 13

[4] Ephesians 1:3-10

[5] Colossians 3:3

[6] Zephaniah 3:17

Other Posts in our Rhythms of Joy Series:

Joy is Important Because it’s an Experience of God

The Amazing Connection Between Grace and Joy

Moving from Discouraged to Encouraged

Coming to Terms with Hard Things

What About Me?

Please Check out the Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading.

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for? Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Free from Me

What About Me?

July 4, 2023 robuck4@aol.com 2 Comments

At the turn of the century, our family went on a short term missions trip to Mexico. During some of our down time, we decided to visit the local market. As we entered, we were amazed at the wide variety of colorful local fare, from flowers, to fruits and vegetables, to intricate crafts.

Immediately, vendors called their products to our attention for purchase. One of us, I can’t remember who, told them we wanted to look around and that we’d come back.

We spent a good bit of time enjoying the massive amount of tables, reaching deeper and deeper into the space, to the point we almost lost our way back to the front. Most of us bought at least one thing.

Suddenly, it dawned upon us how late it was, so we made our way to the front. As we exited, one of the vendors we first encountered yelled in English, “What about me?”

I felt bad and I’m not even sure we responded, but the question, “What about me?” has become a family catch phrase when one of us wants to insert ourselves.

As I continue to walk this journey with Jesus, the more I realize I’m asking the same question in my heart. What about me? Until recently, I didn’t recognize what a consuming quest this really is.

I know I’m not alone in this inward battle. Our Christian lives are a continual challenge, to live in the realities of Galatians 2:20, the great summary of God’s good news. “I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.”

Living a life of “I have been crucified” is not easy.

I see what happened to two of Jesus’ disciples in Mark 9:35-37, “James and John, the two sons of Zebedee, *came up to Jesus, saying to Him, ‘Teacher, we want You to do for us whatever we ask of You.’And He said to them, ‘What do you want Me to do for you?’ They said to Him, ‘Grant that we may sit, one on Your right and one on Your left, in Your glory.’”

They were asking, What about me?

What about me? seems to be built into the fabric of our hearts.

What I want to say is what John the Baptist said, “He must increase, but I must decrease.” (John 3:30 NASB)

What about me? is such a restricting, narrowing view. It limits the world and chokes my joy.

It’s You Lord! changes the game from introspection on my little kingdom, into full hope upon the glorious kingdom of God, waiting to explode into eternal ecstasy. [1]

What about me? requires control and strain to produce circumstances which I hope will maintain my happiness. It puts me where God should be and steals any moments of abiding in His gladness.

It’s You Lord! releases care and trusts in a loving God, who is at work in a greater story of making me more like Jesus. [2]

What about me? longs for the love and approval of others. It produces competitiveness, envy and continual effort to be liked and admired by others.

It’s You Lord! produces gratitude and praise, which keeps me peaceful under the yolk of Jesus’ gentle and humble heart. [3]

I desire this change in my heart, the transformation of John the Baptist, more than anything I can think of. But, I know this kind of work is not a self study class. If I’m to move from What about me? to It’s You Lord! it requires the Lord, not me.

Lord, show me in Your word and empower me by Your Spirit to be less about me and more about You.

He Must Increase, but I Must Decrease.

During our family vacation last year, I was walking on the beach talking with my bride about some deep spiritual matters. This was a convergence of three of our very favorite things to do together: be at the beach, walk, and talk about spiritual things.

As we walked, she said, “We all have swiss cheese hearts.”

This was a striking image as I pictured it and I’ve thought about it a lot since then. Certainly, God has created our hearts with a void only He can fill.

Examining my own heart, I’ve identified five major holes which I’ve historically tried to fill myself. I know, with Solomon, that trying to fill my eternal holes with anything of this world is vanity of vanities. [4] Yet, I scream What about me? as I try and plug these holes myself.

Perhaps others can relate.

The Need to Be Admired

In my heart, I see a deep longing to be admired. When people, especially those important to me, make me feel disliked or even hated, What about me? screams out. The “desired to be admired hole” aches with a painful feeling of being unloved.

It’s You Lord! points me to the amazing love God has for me, as revealed in His word and in His actions. Though there are many scriptures about God’s incomprehensible love for us, [5] I’ll focus on what Jesus told His disciples the night before He died, “Just as the Father has loved Me, I also have loved you; remain in My love.” (John 15:9)

The eternal love of God is the only thing which can fill my hole to be admired. Expecting this kind of love from others is toxic. It not only binds me to the approval of men, but produces a self-serving love for others, which is not sincere.

Ugh. This is really bad When What about me? comes to mind about not being admired, I determine to saturated my heart to overflowing with God’s perfect love.

It’s You Lord!

Lord, You love me with a love I’ll never fully grasp, which fills my heart to overflowing. Please remind me of this when people are mean to me and act hateful.

Resting completely in God’s love

Accepted

In my heart, I see a need to be accepted. When people, especially those important to me, make me feel rejected, What about me? screams out. The “desired to be accepted hole” aches with a painful feeling of being excluded.

It’s You Lord! points me to what God did for all of His children before the world began: Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we would be holy and blameless before Him. In love He predestined us to adoption as sons and daughters through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, with which He favored us in the Beloved. (Ephesians 1:3-6 NASB)

God chose me, to be His child before I was even born. The passage goes on to say that in His love for me, I’ve been lavished with grace, redeemed with His love, and given His Holy Spirit as an installment of my inheritance.

I’ve had some really important people in my life reject me. And the pain does not go away. But it’s a pain of loss, not a loss of value.

No person can define my value, no matter how important. Before I breathed a breath, God called me His own. No person can change that by rejecting me.

It’s You Lord!

Lord, You’ve accepted me by Your blood. This is what matters. Please help me remember this.

Loving Like Joe

Accomplished

In my heart, I see a insatiable need to accomplish things. This drive seems to always be running in the background, to the point that sometimes I have to force myself to relax.

I fight a fear of failure. What about me? yells that nothing I do is good enough. And there’s the problem in the open. What “I” do.

It’s You Lord! points me to II Corinthians 5:21: He made Him who knew no sin to be sin in our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.

Me trying to accomplish some righteousness of my own is the very essence of stupidity. Not only is it impossible, (all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God) [5], but it’s an affront to what Christ has done for me. I do not nullify the grace of God, for if righteousness comes through the Law, then Christ died needlessly. (Galatians 2:21 NASB)

Will I fail? Most definitely; every day. But am I a failure? By now means.

But as for me, I stand on the righteousness of Christ.

It’s You Lord!

You have given me Your righteousness. You have made me complete, fully accomplished in You. Please help me remember this when I feel like a failure.

True Value

Affirmed

In my heart, I see a need to be affirmed, to be recognized, to have my achievements pointed out. What about me? wants my glory to shine.

My, my, my. Me, me me. As I write it’s more than ludicrous. Yet, the temptation rises.

When I think about what Jesus did for me, I realize He wants me to consider myself dead when it comes to my glory. Paul actually wrote this in Colossians 3:3-4: For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is our life, is revealed, then you also will be revealed with Him in glory.

It’s You Lord! helps me realize I’m hidden in Christ. That’s affirmation enough. It’s His life which is to be celebrated, His glory. Why would a dead man need to be recognized and given credit anyway?

Christ is my life. No need to be individually affirmed. One day, I’ll be revealed with Him in glory. His glory, not mine.

Lord, please help me remember this when I feel the need to be recognized and given credit for anything. No need to strive to be affirmed. I rest in You.

Christ our Life

Appeased

In my heart, I recognize the deep need to be satisfied, for my longings to be appeased. As mentioned before, God put longing in every human heart. [6]

Blaise Pascal wrote, “There is a God shaped vacuum in the heart of each man which cannot be satisfied by any created thing, but only by God the creator made known by Jesus Christ.”

What about me? believes I must plug these holes myself. But I can’t. I’ve tried being admired by people, accomplishing many tasks, being pliable to be accepted, and competing to be affirmed.

I’m realizing that the sum of these searches for lasting joy only leave my wanting all the more.

I hear with Abram, “Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward.” (Genesis 15:1 NIV)

I now agree with Asaph, “But as for me, the nearness of God is my good;” (Psalm 73:28a NASB).

And with David, “You have put gladness in my heart, More than when their grain and new wine abound.” (Psalm 4:7 NASB)

It’s You Lord! is the answer to every hole in my swiss cheese heart.

Jesus said to them, “I am the bread of life; he who comes to Me will not hunger, and he who believes in Me will never thirst.” (John 6:35 NASB)

These are some holes in my heart which begin with ‘A’. Lord, show me the whole alphabet. (8^>

Joy, An Experience of God

Unmasking the Lie

Prayer

Lord, I depend upon me so often; even now, after decades of being Your disciple. But You are teaching me to rest in Your yoke. It’s not up to me anymore. It never was.

It’s Your glory, Lord, never mine. When a thought comes to highlight me, please remind me quickly that it’s You.

Lead me, I pray, to quickly disagree with the lies and agree with the truth that I’m complete in You, filled to the brim and overflowing with You in all areas.

In You, I’m always admired, always accepted, fully accomplished, affirmed in Your glory, and fully satisfied by You, my Bread of life. Your rivers of waters completely saturate my thirst.

You want me free, really free.

Please continue to show me ways I choose me and not You, my will and not Yours.

I must decrease and You must increase.

I love You Lord.

Amen.

Not my Will

Journal Time

With your journal in hand, write down any What about me? areas in your own life. It could be one or more identified above or different ones.

When is it most often manifested?

Write down ways you think your self focus hampers your life.

What difference would it make if God was your focus and not you?

Write a prayer expressing your desires to make a change and be less self focused and more God focused, recognizing the need for the Holy Spirit to enable you.

If you’re willing, ask Him to continue to reveal self focused ways in you. He will.

Come back to this journal entry often.

[1] Romans 8:18-23

[2] Romans 8:28-29

[3] Matthew 11:28-30

[4] Ecclesiastes 2:11-22

[5] Romans 3:23

[6] Ecclesiastes 3:11

Other Posts in our Rhythms of Joy Series:

Joy is Important Because it’s an Experience of God

The Amazing Connection Between Grace and Joy

Moving from Discouraged to Encouraged

Coming to Terms with Hard Things

Please Check out the Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading.

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for? Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Delighting in God's love, Grasping God's Delight in Us

Steps of Delight

December 23, 2022 robuck4@aol.com 2 Comments

When I was a kid we had no cell phones, no internet, and no video games. Personal computers hadn’t been invented. We had four TV channels, if you included the educational channel. A few shows were in color including, Disney’s Wonderful World of Color, which aired on Sunday nights. So, we spent a lot of time playing outside.

At the bottom of my road, my good friends Larry and Lee lived next to each other. On Saturday mornings, I might watch a few cartoons, but I much preferred being with my buds. As soon as possible, I’d hop on my bike and coast down the hill to their houses to hang out.

One Saturday morning, in my excitement, I arrived earlier than usual. Seeing no activity at either house, I parked my bike and waited on a short stone wall in between their two houses. I don’t remember who showed up first, but I do recall my delight when one of them emerged from their house. These were my good buddies and we had so much fun together riding our bikes to the community pool, fishing in the creek or playing whatever sport was in season.

I enjoyed being with my friends and I read that God delights to be with me even more than I wanted to be with Lee and Larry.

They confronted me in the day of my calamity, But the Lord was my stay. He brought me forth also into a broad place; He rescued me, because He delighted in me (Psalm 18:18-19 NASB).

This is quite hard to believe, and I don’t always feel as if it’s true. Yet, if I lived the moments of my day in the splendor of this reality, my life would be wonderfully different.

But how?

First, I must realize the facts concerning God’s love for me, then I must act upon the truths or count them as so.

Realize and Recon, the two step of walking in God’s delight.

REALIZE

Realize – to become aware of something as a fact, understand fully

There are many verses in the Bible about how very much God loves his children.

Following is just a few to personalize in a conversation with God:

Before the world was formed, You chose to love me and to adopt me as Your child [1]
You’ve loved me with an everlasting love, a love which is unaffected by any of my thoughts, how I feel or even my choices [2]
You’re familiar with all my ways, You weaved me together in my mother’s womb, Your thoughts toward me are beyond number [3]
Your love for me surpasses understanding. Even the breadth, width, length and height of the ocean and the sky above doesn’t adequately portray how delighted You are in me [4]
Even when I was against You, dead in my sinful ways and lost with no hope, You gave Your very life so that we could be together forever [5]
You rejoice and shout for joy when You’re with me [6]

Pause a moment and relook at these truths. Take note of any which your mind pushes away as not true. Perhaps there’s a lie you’re believing which repels the truth.

Spend awhile in prayer disagreeing with the lie, recognizing that God’s word is far more reliable than historically faulty thinking.

RECKON

Reckon – rely on something to be sure.

In verse 11 of Romans chapter 6, Paul tells us to reckon ourselves dead to sin. Other translations say “consider”. The idea is to personally count as a fact something that is true. As certain as a bank statement is reconciled, and there is no “maybe” about it. It’s either reconciled or not. What God says is true. We’re to reckon it so.

For example, I read God delights to be with me, that I cause Him to be joyful. Though this seems unbelievable, His word says it’s true, so I reckon it so.

From what we realized above, we rely on to be true:

Before I was even born, God chose to love me
God adopted me to be His child
God loves me with a love which can’t change, even when I sin
God knows everything about me, yet still loves me
God uniquely fashioned me in my mother’s womb
God thinks about me all the time
God loves me with a quality of love which doesn’t fit in my mind. His love is beyond measuring. It surpasses knowledge and doesn’t fit in my mind
God loves me with a love which is greater than my disposition toward Him. Even when I was against Him, Christ gave His life for me.
God loves me so much; I bring Him joy.

Practice the Rhythm

Pick one amazing truth about God’s love for you a day and do the two-step.

Realize it – lodge it in your mind

Recon it – consider it true no matter what rises in opposition

Nevertheless I am continually with You;
You have taken hold of my right hand. (Psalm 73:23 NASB)

Remember, as you walk, He’s taken hold of your hand.