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Raw and Weary

(The Everlasting Way) Courage Rising

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I woke up this morning with light breaking through in my weary soul.

It’s a few days after Christmas, and it’s been a December to remember. In the last three weeks my bride has been through teeth issues, a severe case of shingles (V2 – maxillary variation, which affected the middle of her the left side of her face, very close to her eye), and potentially life-threatening blood clots (two of which traveled to her lungs).

She has been such a trouper through it all. 

Personally, I’ve felt extremely inadequate in my role as health care nurse. Nothing in me could have ensured my bride got the care she needed. But God’s strength held us up. I’m seeing that coming to the end of me sooner than later is way better, allowing His strength to shine through me. But it hasn’t been easy. 😑

I haven’t felt a lot of emotions during this time. As has been my MO, I tend to take a deep breath and keep on keeping on with whatever is required. This can be good, but now that there’s a break in the storm, I’m trying to care for my heart, to bring the realities of what’s been happening to Jesus, Keeper of my soul.

During my “soldiering on,” there was a moment, during the operation to remove the clots from my bride’s leg, that the severity of her situation hit me and emotions flowed.

At around 10:30 am, they wheeled her down to a special surgery room in the basement for a procedure that would last about an hour and a half. I met the surgeon and was told where to wait around the corner.

After two hours, I began to worry. I walked around to the surgery room and peeked in through a crack in the door. Bad idea. All I saw was a bunch of blood. Was she okay?

A few minutes later, the surgeon came in and let us know the surgery was successful, but that the clotting was quite extensive. He showed us the clot board. 

My brother-in-law, a cardiologist, flew down from Wilmington, N.C. for the day. After the surgery, he told me how serious the whole thing was.

As my bride continues to heal, I sense a measure of healing in my own soul. As I begin to come out of the raw weariness of what we’ve been experiencing, the Lord is showing me how to steward my heart, bringing all that I am to Him, my God of all comfort. [1]

 I’ve been quite discouraged, although I’ve only recently realized it.

Today I sense courage rising.

Affection

God’s truth always brings me courage. I turn to some of my favorite verses.

If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. 2 Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth (Colossians 3:1-2 KJV).

I particularly like the way the King James renders ‘affection’ from the Greek word – “phroneite.”   

Other versions translate the Greek word as “mind.” But the idea of setting my “affection” on the things above resonates with me this morning.

“Affection” brings my focus from thinking to a heartfelt, whole-soul longing.

It’s so easy for me to set my affections on the happenings of this world, seeking in what I see and experience to carry my hope, my peace, and my joy. These verses help change my focus from all that’s swirling around me and helps me orient my life around God’s eternal truths.

Setting my fondness, my tenderness, my devotion, my attentiveness, my attachment, and my caring on the things above, rather than on the fragility of the here and now, makes so much more sense.

But how do I do that?

Attentiveness

Attentiveness is listed as a synonym for affection.

Our attention is a resource of our minds. Perhaps that’s where the term ‘pay attention’ comes from.

If I spend my attention on sports, politics, entertainment, leisure, etc., these things tend to dominate my affections. There’s nothing wrong with any of these, but they need to be subservient to my higher affection: my Lord Jesus Christ, His commands, and His Kingdom.

As He said:

But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you (Matthew 6:33).

And He said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the great and foremost commandment. 39 The second is like it, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets” (Matthew 22:37-40).

These verses seem to capture Jesus’ desire for us to set our attention and affections on loving Him and others, and on His emerging Kingdom (His rule and His reign).

Only by abiding in the Indwelling Holy Spirit, and yielding to His power, can I set my affection on the things above and not on the temporal things around me. [2]

Prayer

Lord, I thank You so much for Your care for us during these last three weeks. You’ve entrusted us with some hard things, but You have never left our sides.

These hard times quickly brought me to the end of me.[3] I can’t but You can. I need You desperately.

Thank You for the practical ways my wife is seeing how much I love her as You nurse her through me.

Thank You for bringing light to my weary soul and helping me process what we’re going through. And please continue Your healing of my bride, as the pain of shingles continues. 

And Lord, I desire to set my affections on things above, on You and Your emerging Kingdom. Please keep my attention on these things as the temporal world continues to swirl around me. 

Thank You for giving me courage through the truths of Your word.

I love You so much!

Reflection

As I continue to ponder, I see the connection between affection and affecting.

My affections affect who I am.

The words affect and affection come from the same Latin root meaning – “a state produced in a person by something acting upon them.” [4]

As I set my affections on the Lord and His ways, I’m affected in deep, soul transforming ways. 

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. 18 But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit (II Corinthians 3:17-18).

As I am transformed, I pray I might affect (love) all those around me as Christ has loved me. [5]

As I’m affected in the ways of Christ, as Christ is formed in me [6], His life is revealed. 

For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God (Colossians 3:3).

Quotes 

  • “Where your pleasure is, there is your treasure; where your treasure is, there is your heart; where your heart is, there is your happiness.”  Augustine of Hippo (Augustine is essentially saying: your affections follow what you attend to.) [4]

  • “We are often distracted by trifles, and seldom fully recollected.” Thomas à Kempis (Our attention drifts toward what our hearts are already leaning toward.) [4]

  • “Set your affections on the things above, and your thoughts will follow.” John Owens (He often taught that attention is the steering wheel of the heart.) [4]

[1] II Corinthians 1:3-5

[2] John 15:5

[3] II Corinthians 1:8-9

[4] From Co-Pilot

[5] John 13:34-35, John 15:12

Note: Unless otherwise noted, all referenced Scripture is from the NASB 1995 version of the Bible.

Other posts in our Everlasting Way Series:

Learning How to Overcome Emotional Numbness

Embracing God’s Amazing Love

Are we More Like Batman or Spider-Man

Transforming Awareness: The Power of God’s Love

Minding Your Busyness

Our Deepest Longings Filled

Rules Don’t Rule

Mice in the Sock Drawer

Turning Gainers into Drainers

Until the Darkness Fades

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

This collection of devotionals chronicles a heartfelt journey from a life of striving and self-reliance to one of growing surrender and trust in God.

Through personal stories of family struggles, cancer, grief, and unexpected trials, the devotions show that true, unshakeable joy comes not from perfect circumstances, but from the constant, loving presence of Jesus Christ.

It’s an invitation to learn to let go of our burdens and find growing peace in God’s greater story.

Finding Joy in Life’s Moments

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.

For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in an old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowingly set off a series of events which uncovers a plot to wipe out a whole family. Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Raw and Weary

(The Everlasting Way) Courage Rising

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I woke up this morning with light breaking through in my weary soul.

It’s a few days after Christmas, and it’s been a December to remember. In the last three weeks my bride has been through teeth issues, a severe case of shingles (V2 – maxillary variation, which affected the middle of her the left side of her face, very close to her eye), and potentially life-threatening blood clots (two of which traveled to her lungs).

She has been such a trouper through it all. 

Personally, I’ve felt extremely inadequate in my role as health care nurse. Nothing in me could have ensured my bride got the care she needed. But God’s strength held us up. I’m seeing that coming to the end of me sooner than later is way better, allowing His strength to shine through me. But it hasn’t been easy. 😑

I haven’t felt a lot of emotions during this time. As has been my MO, I tend to take a deep breath and keep on keeping on with whatever is required. This can be good, but now that there’s a break in the storm, I’m trying to care for my heart, to bring the realities of what’s been happening to Jesus, Keeper of my soul.

During my “soldiering on,” there was a moment, during the operation to remove the clots from my bride’s leg, that the severity of her situation hit me and emotions flowed.

At around 10:30 am, they wheeled her down to a special surgery room in the basement for a procedure that would last about an hour and a half. I met the surgeon and was told where to wait around the corner.

After two hours, I began to worry. I walked around to the surgery room and peeked in through a crack in the door. Bad idea. All I saw was a bunch of blood. Was she okay?

A few minutes later, the surgeon came in and let us know the surgery was successful, but that the clotting was quite extensive. He showed us the clot board. 

My brother-in-law, a cardiologist, flew down from Wilmington, N.C. for the day. After the surgery, he told me how serious the whole thing was.

As my bride continues to heal, I sense a measure of healing in my own soul. As I begin to come out of the raw weariness of what we’ve been experiencing, the Lord is showing me how to steward my heart, bringing all that I am to Him, my God of all comfort. [1]

 I’ve been quite discouraged, although I’ve only recently realized it.

Today I sense courage rising.

Affection

God’s truth always brings me courage. I turn to some of my favorite verses.

If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. 2 Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth (Colossians 3:1-2 KJV).

I particularly like the way the King James renders ‘affection’ from the Greek word – “phroneite.”   

Other versions translate the Greek word as “mind.” But the idea of setting my “affection” on the things above resonates with me this morning.

“Affection” brings my focus from thinking to a heartfelt, whole-soul longing.

It’s so easy for me to set my affections on the happenings of this world, seeking in what I see and experience to carry my hope, my peace, and my joy. These verses help change my focus from all that’s swirling around me and helps me orient my life around God’s eternal truths.

Setting my fondness, my tenderness, my devotion, my attentiveness, my attachment, and my caring on the things above, rather than on the fragility of the here and now, makes so much more sense.

But how do I do that?

Attentiveness

Attentiveness is listed as a synonym for affection.

Our attention is a resource of our minds. Perhaps that’s where the term ‘pay attention’ comes from.

If I spend my attention on sports, politics, entertainment, leisure, etc., these things tend to dominate my affections. There’s nothing wrong with any of these, but they need to be subservient to my higher affection: my Lord Jesus Christ, His commands, and His Kingdom.

As He said:

But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you (Matthew 6:33).

And He said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the great and foremost commandment. 39 The second is like it, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets” (Matthew 22:37-40).

These verses seem to capture Jesus’ desire for us to set our attention and affections on loving Him and others, and on His emerging Kingdom (His rule and His reign).

Only by abiding in the Indwelling Holy Spirit, and yielding to His power, can I set my affection on the things above and not on the temporal things around me. [2]

Prayer

Lord, I thank You so much for Your care for us during these last three weeks. You’ve entrusted us with some hard things, but You have never left our sides.

These hard times quickly brought me to the end of me.[3] I can’t but You can. I need You desperately.

Thank You for the practical ways my wife is seeing how much I love her as You nurse her through me.

Thank You for bringing light to my weary soul and helping me process what we’re going through. And please continue Your healing of my bride, as the pain of shingles continues. 

And Lord, I desire to set my affections on things above, on You and Your emerging Kingdom. Please keep my attention on these things as the temporal world continues to swirl around me. 

Thank You for giving me courage through the truths of Your word.

I love You so much!

Reflection

As I continue to ponder, I see the connection between affection and affecting.

My affections affect who I am.

The words affect and affection come from the same Latin root meaning – “a state produced in a person by something acting upon them.” [4]

As I set my affections on the Lord and His ways, I’m affected in deep, soul transforming ways. 

Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. 18 But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit (II Corinthians 3:17-18).

As I am transformed, I pray I might affect (love) all those around me as Christ has loved me. [5]

As I’m affected in the ways of Christ, as Christ is formed in me [6], His life is revealed. 

For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God (Colossians 3:3).

Quotes 

  • “Where your pleasure is, there is your treasure; where your treasure is, there is your heart; where your heart is, there is your happiness.”  Augustine of Hippo (Augustine is essentially saying: your affections follow what you attend to.) [4]

  • “We are often distracted by trifles, and seldom fully recollected.” Thomas à Kempis (Our attention drifts toward what our hearts are already leaning toward.) [4]

  • “Set your affections on the things above, and your thoughts will follow.” John Owens (He often taught that attention is the steering wheel of the heart.) [4]

[1] II Corinthians 1:3-5

[2] John 15:5

[3] II Corinthians 1:8-9

[4] From Co-Pilot

[5] John 13:34-35, John 15:12

Note: Unless otherwise noted, all referenced Scripture is from the NASB 1995 version of the Bible.

Other posts in our Everlasting Way Series:

Learning How to Overcome Emotional Numbness

Embracing God’s Amazing Love

Are we More Like Batman or Spider-Man

Transforming Awareness: The Power of God’s Love

Minding Your Busyness

Our Deepest Longings Filled

Rules Don’t Rule

Mice in the Sock Drawer

Turning Gainers into Drainers

Until the Darkness Fades

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

This collection of devotionals chronicles a heartfelt journey from a life of striving and self-reliance to one of growing surrender and trust in God.

Through personal stories of family struggles, cancer, grief, and unexpected trials, the devotions show that true, unshakeable joy comes not from perfect circumstances, but from the constant, loving presence of Jesus Christ.

It’s an invitation to learn to let go of our burdens and find growing peace in God’s greater story.

Finding Joy in Life’s Moments

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.

For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in an old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowingly set off a series of events which uncovers a plot to wipe out a whole family. Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Earnest Prayer, Prayer Never Ceasing

(The Everlasting Way) Until the Darkness Fades

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I don’t take advantage of it much, but one of my favorite times of day is right after the sun peaks over the eastern sky. Where we live, in a uniquely rural neighborhood in the midlands of South Carolina, trees block the horizon. However, I can still make out the soft bands of peach, lavender and rose as the sky slowly fades into a pale blue beyond the shadows of the pines.

In early fall, the drying of our wide variety of oak tree leaves releases a dry and nutty fragrance as the time of harvest begins. And oh, those acorns! This year they seem larger and many more than ever before.

The fallen pine needles emit a strong resinous scent, mingling with the sweetness of decaying foliage. Our tea olive blooms give off a soft fragrance, which I’ve always associated with heaven.

A gentle cool breeze brushes over my bald head and exposed skin as a welcome salve from months of summer heat. Breathing in deeply, the dawn air tastes clean and mineral rich.

Melodious bird songs awaken the quiet night. A neighbor’s rooster crows in boisterous glee.

Such are the marvels of a new day.

But in all the splendor, perhaps the fading of the veil of darkness most lightens our souls.

Jacob wrestled with a mysterious man throughout the night. At daybreak, God gave him a new name, Isreal (He that strives with God). Then he limped away, transformed. [1]

During the first Passover in Egypt, the Israelites endured the darkness of death throughout the night. At dawn, they began their journey of freedom, having been released from bondage. [2]

Light, as it brightens many a dark night of the soul, ushers in the hope of a new day and the fading of darkness.

In this World you will Have Trouble

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about our human endeavor to remain courageous while the storms of life swirl all around us. From Jesus’ own words, we know tribulation is a part of our journey, and He calls us to remain courageous. These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world (John 16:33).

But how? How do we remain courageous with so much darkness?

The twinge of grey in a predawn sky, which brightens with the rising sun, carries with it the mercies of a new day.

The Lord’s lovingkindnesses indeed never cease.
For His compassions never fail.
23 They are new every morning;
Great is Your faithfulness (Lamentations 3:22-23).

The smallest ray of God’s loving, healing light can illuminate the darkness in a human heart and grow ever brighter.

But the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, that shines brighter and brighter until the full day (Proverbs 4:18).

May this Cup Pass

Jesus, in His humanity, asked God to remove the cup of suffering. He prayed earnestly until blood dropped from His pores. He longed for His Father’s purposes to be accomplished differently. But He always submitted to God’s will no matter how it affected Him.

“Father, if You are willing, remove this cup from Me; yet not My will, but Yours be done (Luke 22:42).”

There are situations in my life right now that are very hard. But by the strength of God’s Indwelling Spirit. I want to keep earnestly praying for His love and healing touch to break through.

And always to surrender, as Jesus did, to Father God’s will in my life. And always to trust in His great love.

Darkness in the Land

There’s plenty of darkness all around. People we love are sick. People have broken relationships. Loved ones do not know Your love and will spend eternity without You. Folks are lonely, addicted, jobless and homeless. When we see these troubles, we can easily become discouraged.

Yet, we’re to expect trials and to remain courageous. Knowing this, and realizing God’s greater purposes, we keep asking for His light to shine in the darkness, around us and in us.  

Praying for Light  

But even as our hearts are being transformed and healing light shines around, darkness remains in our land. Do I allow it to steal my courage and zap my joy? Or, do they become the impetuous to follow Jesus’ example of earnest prayer? If this darkness is keeping me praying, it must serve some purpose.

As Graham Cooke stated on his podcast Brilliant Perspectives, “God has allowed in His wisdom what He could have prevented in His power.”

Praying and Not Giving Up

I’m learning not to hang my welfare on my happiness. I’m learning to draw my contentment from what Christ has already done, my hope for His return, my righteousness in His accomplishments,

I pray and never give up.

Rejoice always; 17 pray without ceasing; 18 in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus (I Thessalonians 5:16-18).

Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful (Colossians 4:2 NIV).

Prayer

Lord, I’m really not good at consistent praying, but I want this to change. I’ve seen light emerge in very long difficulties, and some remain completely dark.

Please give me the persistence and self-control to remain vigilant in prayer. My mind so often wanders.

Jesus, even as the Son of God, You prayed earnestly and often, getting up early before sunrise to be alone with Your Father. [3]

Lord, like anything else in life, apart from You, I can do nothing of real value. [4] Please develop in me a tenacity and consistency in prayer. I can’t do it without Your Spirit.

I love You

Reflection

My bride has created what she calls a war room, inspired by the book and film of the same name. [5]

It’s part of her office on our second floor.

So far, I haven’t used it as a prayer room, but I’d like to see that change.

On her walls, she has pictures of our family and those we hold dear. There’s much joy that springs forth from these photos and symbols, but also much pain. I hope to spend time in this warrior room, praying circles around all we hold near.

As I pray, I want to surrender idols in my own heart which would choose comfort and false affection above God, my Highest Joy.

I keep on praying until the darkness fades

[1] Genesis 32:24-31

[2] Exodus 12

[3] Luke 5:16

[4] John 15;5

[5] War Room is a book by Chris Fabry turned into a movie by The Kendrick Brothers

Note: Unless otherwise noted, all referenced Scripture is from the NASB 1995 version of the Bible.

Other posts in our Everlasting Way Series:

Learning How to Overcome Emotional Numbness

Embracing God’s Amazing Love

Are we More Like Batman or Spider-Man

Transforming Awareness: The Power of God’s Love

Minding Your Busyness

Our Deepest Longings Filled

Rules Don’t Rule

Mice in the Sock Drawer

Turning Gainers into Drainers

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

This collection of devotionals chronicles a heartfelt journey from a life of striving and self-reliance to one of growing surrender and trust in God.

Through personal stories of family struggles, cancer, grief, and unexpected trials, the devotions show that true, unshakeable joy comes not from perfect circumstances, but from the constant, loving presence of Jesus Christ.

It’s an invitation to learn to let go of our burdens and find growing peace in God’s greater story.

Finding Joy in Life’s Moments

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.

For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in an old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowingly set off a series of events which uncovers a plot to wipe out a whole family. Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Eternal Gladness, God our Joy

(The Everlasting Way) Our Deepest Longings Filled

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‘Uncle!’

Disillusioned, hopes crushed, my fragile world was crumbling around me. What I thought would bring lasting happiness left me disheartened, disappointed and empty. I wasn’t suicidal, but I felt like giving up. In fact, if I’d known where to go to ‘cry uncle,’ [1] I would have.

This describes several “low” points in my life. Maybe you’ve felt this way before.

I see now how I’d set my affections on God’s benefits rather than on God himself. Sometimes I still do.

I feel miserable during these times. But looking back, I see these very hard times as severe mercies, [2] each playing a part in further dislodging a destructive, disillusioning lie – Circumstantial happiness can bring lasting joy 

Our God Shaped Void

In the 1600s, Bliase Pascal wrote that only an infinite, immutable object can fill man’s cravings for true happiness.

His point was that man tries in vain to fill this need for lasting satisfaction with everything around him, when in fact only God Himself can give us what we so passionately desire. What Pascal was describing came to be known as our God-shaped void. [3]

Solomon, known as the wisest man who ever lived, concluded that God has set eternity in the hearts of men. [4]

Deep within every human lies an unquenchable longing for someone eternal: God Himself.

Some have the means to try filling this void with all manner of worldly ‘pleasantries.’ However, when the temporal luster wears off, emptiness returns.

When the temporal happiness of each ‘conquest’ fades, folks set their sights on something more. But the story repeats itself, and despair grows.

Someone asked John D. Rockefeller, “How much money is enough?” He replied, “Just a little bit more.”

Others with fewer resources might hope their whole lives for riches or fame. However, never achieving them, they die chasing a dream which would have never satisfied them anyway.

Unless awakened, we keep on searching and endlessly hoping the next big thing will finally satisfy our longing souls.

Awakened

God told Abram what we need to know right this moment.

Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward (Genesis 15:1b (NIV))

GOD HIMSELF is our GREAT REWARD. He fills the eternal void in our souls.

God Himself is the only one who can give us the deep JOY our hearts long for.

David discovered that the pinnacle of JOY is found only in being with God.

In Your presence is fullness of joy; (Psalm 16:11b).

The Joy of God exudes from every sunset, every flower, every breath.

I’m to draw near to God and His creation and stop trying to make happiness happen. I’m to take time to celebrate each moment God gives me.

After all, as a believer in Jesus Christ, I’m indwelt by His Holy Spirit. His creation is all around me and He is in me.

Consider what Jesus said:

I am the bread of life; he who comes to Me will not hunger and he who believes in me will never thirst (John 6:35).

As His disciples, we need not hunger or thirst. He Himself is the eternal bread that deeply satisfies our souls.

Freshly baked bread.

If any man is thirsty, let him come to me and drink. He who believes in Me, as the Scripture said, ‘From his innermost being will flow rivers of living water’ (John 7:37b-38).

The Holy Spirit within us refreshes our weary, thirsty souls with rivers of living water.

Cool, crisp Living Water as from a mountain stream.

Prayer

Lord, I’m sorry for all I’ve chased after to try to satisfy the deep longings of my heart. Satisfaction can’t come from success because I’ve failed. It can’t come from pleasure because it quickly fades. It can’t come from people because they disappoint. It can’t come from trying to live a good life because I can’t.

You’ve given me so many things to enjoy: sunsets, puppies, flowers, ocean breezes, people I love, tea olives, chocolate, coffee, beaches and mountain streams. You are the Creator of it all. You alone are my Highest Joy. Only with You are other pleasures fully enjoyed.

Apart from You, other pleasures can become addictions and idols. But with You, all moment by moment pleasures can erupt into praise for who You are and all You’ve provided for me to enjoy.

I delight in You, Lord, above all else. Please guard my heart.

Amen

Reflections

Even though I’m increasingly aware that God Himself is my source of eternal Joy, I sometimes forget and join the world in seeking my fulfillment from what God has created and not in God Himself.

What I’ve realized is that we have to know there are forces at work to hide the fact that God Himself is our Highest Joy.

The world, enforced by Satan’s lies, can keep us pursuing fleeting pleasures even though we know how empty they are.

It is a moment-by-moment battle to think true thoughts and to keep our hearts centered on God for our fulfillment.

Paul warns us of what is going on behind the scenes to try to keep us from the knowledge of God. But he also reassures us that we have powerful weapons at our disposal to fight and destroy the lies of the enemy.

For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh, for the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses. We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ (II Corinthians 10:3-5).

In speaking and dwelling on God’s truth our weapons are divinely powerful to destroy the strongholds of the enemy designed to hide the knowledge of God from us. Our job is to disagree with the lies and not allow them to be a part of us by agreeing with them.

For example, a lie might be that this or that ungodly act will bring the lasting fulfillment we so desperately need. And even though we know from experience that this lie is not true, our enemies’ ways are cunning and luring. We have a fight on our hands.

We must capture and unmask lies like these, thought by thought, to reveal them for the hideous deceptions that they are. Only in Jesus Christ will we find the lasting satisfaction, fulfillment and the joy we were created to experience.

You have put gladness in my heart, More than when their grain and new wine abound (Psalm 4:7).

Note: Unless otherwise noted, all referenced Scripture is from the NASB 1995 version of the Bible. The featured picture was generated by AI.

Continue reading (The Everlasting Way) Our Deepest Longings Filled →

Tending our Hearts

Above all Else

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One of my daughter’s favorite verses is Proverbs 4:23: Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life.

We all MUST watch and keep guard over our hearts. Our physical hearts are designed for the flow of life’s blood. Our spiritual hearts are designed for the flow of God’s Living Waters in our soul.

Now on the last day, the great day of the feast, Jesus stood and cried out, saying, “If anyone is thirsty, let him come to Me and drink. He who believes in Me, as the Scripture said, ‘From his innermost being will flow rivers of living water.[1]’”

Our hearts were designed for Living Water, the presence of God by His Holy Spirit. Only His presence will completely satisfy our thirsty souls, but too often we settle for temporal, false affections. In confusion, we can pursue worldly passion to satisfy the deep longings of our hearts. We can spend our lives searching down “promising” paths which only disappoint, disillusion and dishearten.

With all diligence we must tend to our hearts.

Through Jeremiah, the Lord spoke of the human tendency to reject Him, the source of Living Water and settle for dry and dusty mirages, “For My people have committed two evils: They have forsaken Me, The fountain of living waters, To hew for themselves cisterns, Broken cisterns That can hold no water.”[2]

Without realizing it, we can waste our lives on broken cisterns which promise to fulfill but leave us dying of thirst.

A few years ago, my bride gave me one of those small statues with no face. Maybe you’ve seen them. Perhaps the lack of features allows us to identify with the characters. This one is a boy tenderly cradling his heart. I love it. It speaks to me on so many levels. It reminds me not to allow false affections to produce broken cisterns.

In addition to guarding my heart against idols, I’m also learning to come to terms with what I’m feeling. Over the years, I’ve not always known what to do with extreme feelings of rejection, fear and sadness. Rather than dealing with them, I tend to deny their gravity so I can continue to function. After all, responsibilities don’t slow down when we’re experiencing deep emotional pain.

But denying emotional pain isn’t wise. When I ignore hard feelings, parts of my heart become crusted over and deadened, leaving me less compassionate and less sensitive to God’s leading.

I’m learning to tend my heart in times of deep emotions; calling the God of all Comfort near in every situation. God’s Rivers of Living Water bring His Oil of Gladness to soothe and heal deadened synapses deep with my heart. The presence of God brings unexplainable Cheer, even in the hardest of times. Sometimes the pain lingers, but Joy remains, infusing courage.

Our hearts must be tended. We need to be on constant guard against false affections. We must be aware of what we’re feeling so that God’s Spirit can bring Truth and Comfort.

I like the NIV version of my daughter’s verse: Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

Above all else.

Prayer

Lord, above all else. This seems important. I know from experience that the diligence needed to keep, to guard, to tend to my heart, must come from you. To keep my heart from being trapped by false affections, wearied from creating broken cisterns and deadened from denying pain, I need You. I know You’re always with me. Please remind me to tend my heart and be my strength to remain vigilant. Amen.

[1] John 7:37-38 (NASB)

[2] Jeremiah 2:13 (NASB)

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures. Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post once a week. Thank you for reading. 

Novels by the Author:

Beyond Time

Hope Remains

God is our Reward, The Source of all Joy

The Monkey Trap

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Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking fine pearls,and upon finding one pearl of great value, he went and sold all that he had and bought it. (Matthew 13:45-46)[1]

Troublesome monkeys have been known to be caught with a simple trap which plays on their unwillingness to open their hands. A coconut is hollowed out with a hole just big enough for the monkey’s hand to fit in. Sweet rice is placed inside. When a monkey reaches in and grabs the bait, their fist is stuck in the hole. Unwilling to open their hands and give up the prize, the monkey is trapped and eventually caught.

We can learn from their ignorant stubbornness. We’re to love the Lord our God with all our heart, soul and mind. But we can be fooled into loving the good things of life above Him. God wants us to experience Him as our highest Joy. When we hold tightly to earthly idols, our hearts are trapped and limited to fleeting, temporal joys. We’re unstable and tossed into the changing seas of circumstance. But we need to know  God is at work in us to conform us into the image of His Son and to free us into the complete Joy of knowing Him as our Pearl of Great Value, worth all we have.

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son, so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren; (Romans 8:28-29)

The ‘good’ God is causing in our lives may require the violent prying away of the sweet rice we clutch in our hands. It may hurt, but it’s for our greater good. It might seem unloving, but as a parent protects a child from harm, God is at work in His children.

For Paul, he needed to learn to not depend on himself. See what he wrote in 2 Corinthians 1:8-9.  For we do not want you to be unaware, brethren, of our affliction which came to us in Asia, that we were burdened excessively, beyond our strength, so that we despaired even of life; indeed, we had the sentence of death within ourselves so that we would not trust in ourselves, but in God who raises the dead;

What’s keeping us bound up in the monkey trap? Do we depend too much on ourselves? What are we afraid to let of go because we don’t think we’ll be okay when we do? Among other things, I’ve needed to let go of self-effort, family, success and peace as the world give it. When I value these things above God, I’m trapped. I can feel discouraged  and the flow of joy being drained from my life.

See Peter’s conclusion of this process toward the end of his life: In this (our Living Hope and Inheritance) you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which]is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ; and though you have not seen Him, you love Him, and though you do not see Him now, but believe in Him, you greatly rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, obtaining as the outcome of your faith the salvation of your souls. (I Peter 1:6-9)

When we understand God’s greater purposes for our lives and grow in our realization of His eternal love, we’re infused with courage for the trials we face.

 Lord, please continue to show me things I’m holding onto which keep me trapped to this world. Like Peter, may I embrace the trials which chisel me more and more into Your image and reveal the utter joy of Your presence. I know You love me and have my better good in mind. I open the hands of my heart to You.  

[1] All quotes from Scripture and from the New American Standard version of the Bible (NASB)

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures. Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post once a week. Thank you for reading. 

Novels by the Author:

Beyond Time

Hope Remains

Freedom in Christ, Joy in Failure

The Joy of Complete Forgiveness

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Purify me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. Make me to hear joy and gladness, Let the bones which You have broken rejoice. Hide Your face from my sins And blot out all my iniquities. (Psalm 51:7-9 NASB)

We all have stories. Imagine yours including adultery, murder and deceit. What would it be like waking up each morning with a hidden blanket of guilt and shame to drag around your day? The coverup would require you to live separated from your heart, the wellspring of your life.[1] The flow of courage would be clogged, Dis-couragement would set in. This was David’s story before he wrote the verses above.

If we’re honest, we’ve all dealt with some level of guilt and shame involving our choices. We may not have physically committed adultery and murder, but in our pursuits of personal happiness and fulfillment we’ve chosen us over God.

What do we do? Do we try really hard to do good, hoping our deeds will tip the scale and outweigh our dirty hands? Some religions suggest this path of salvation. But trying to earn a right standing with God leads to joyless self-effort and striving. We can never become clean on our own.

But there’s really good news, “holiness is not something you achieve but something you receive.”[2]

What we can’t do, God did for us through the sacrifice of His only Son. He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. (II Corinthians 5:21 NASB)

But to receive forgiveness, we must believe in the timeless work of Jesus. He died on our behalf, washing us clean. “Come now and let us reason together,” Says the Lord, “Though your sins are as scarlet, They will be as white as snow; though they are crimson, They will be like wool.” (Isaiah 1:18 NASB)

After committing adultery with Bathsheba, David tried to cover up his transgression by having her husband, Uriah, killed in battle. Psalm 51 is his confession. Though he lived before Jesus, David too was saved by grace, through faith. David trusted in God’s goodness and forgiveness, even in the midst of being responsible for a man’s death. David received complete forgiveness and it gave him great joy. How joyful is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered! How joyful is the man the Lord does not charge with sin and in whose spirit is no deceit! (Psalm 32:1-2 HCSB)

David’s life was not perfect after he wrote Psalm 51. He struggled. But what made him a man after God’s own heart was his quick confessions and repentance, walking in God’s forgiveness and Christ’s righteousness.

We can wake up each morning with no guilt and shame, because of what Christ has done for us. Pursuing holiness, we walk in the goodness and mercy of God. Leaving the past behind, we can experience the joy of complete forgiveness, continually giving glory to God for the grace He’s lavished on us, even when we fail.

Lord, this truth of complete forgiveness has alluded me. It’s easy to unconsciously think it’s still up to me. But You’ve made it clear. In You, my heart is wiped completely clean. Please continue to reveal idols of self that I might quickly confess and repent. Teach me the Joy of Your complete forgiveness.  

[1] Proverbs 4:23

[2] Jeff Shipman in a Sermon on Isaiah 1 at Columbia Crossroads Church

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures. Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post once a week. Thank you for reading. 

 Novels by the Author:

Beyond Time

Hope Remains

Unrelenting

Until the Darkness Fades (Republished in the Everlasting Way)

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Lord, Take this Cup

Jesus, in your humanity, You prayed that the cup of suffering might be taken away. You asked for the support of trusted brothers. You earnestly prayed until blood dropped from Your pores. You longed for Your Father’s purposes to be accomplished in a different way. But You always submitted to God’s will in spite of how it affected you.

“Father, if You are willing, remove this cup from Me; yet not My will, but Yours be done (Luke 22:42 NASB).”

Lord, there are situations in our lives which are very hard. Please teach us how to keep earnestly praying for Your love and healing touch to break through. Yet, like You demonstrated in the Garden of Gethsemane, teach us to trust Father God in spite of what’s going on around us.

Giants in the Land

Lord, there are giants in the land. And unlike Goliath, these giants don’t seem to be going away any time soon. People we love are sick. Relationships are broken. Loved ones don’t know Your love and are destined to an eternity without You. Folks are lonely, addicted, jobless and homeless. When we see these troubles we can easily become discouraged.

Yet, you tell us to expect troubles and to remain courageous.

In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world (John 16:33 NIV).”

Knowing this, and realizing Your greater purposes, we keep asking for Your light to shine in the darkness, around us and in us.

Until the Darkness Fades 

My daughter is a talented musician and song writer. In the lyrics of a song she recently wrote  – “until the darkness fades.”

It occurs to me that when darkness fades, light has begun. I think of the twinge of grey in a predawn sky, which brightens with the rising sun. The smallest ray of God’s loving, healing light can illuminate the darkness in a human heart and grow ever brighter.

But the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, That shines brighter and brighter until the full day (Proverbs 4:18 NASB).

When I think about the continual transformation of my own heart, which began over 40 years, I recognize God’s persistent work of enlightenment. There were times when the growing light was stalled because of my own unwillingness to surrender. But God is relentless in His desire for my freedom. He wants me free from needing smooth circumstances, success, the love of others and worldly security. He won’t give up until His light fills every crevice of my hearts. I’m complete in Christ and He wants me to fully know it.

Praying for Light  

But even as our hearts are being transformed, giants are still around. Do I allow them to steal my courage and zap my joy?  Or, do they become the impetuous to follow Jesus’ example of earnest prayer. If these giants are keeping me praying, then they must serve some purpose.

As Graham Cooke stated in his podcast Brilliant Perspectives,  “God has allowed in His wisdom, what He could have prevented in His power.”

But still. I don’t want these giants around. Like the orcs were over run by the light of Gandolf’s staff, I pray for their destruction. I pray for God’s light to reveal, to heal to penetrate the darkness with blinding power.

Praying Circles  

I’m learning not to hang my welfare on my own happiness. I’m learning to draw my contentment from what Christ has already done, my hope from His return and my joy from His presence. However, I still have a part to play in the here and now, especially in respect to these giants.

I was recently introduced to the concept of praying circles from a book entitled The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson. What I like about circular praying is the visual of continual prayer and of targeting ; kind of like a bull’s eye.

Behind our barn, next to the chicken coop, is an old white cabinet with a door. It was in my grandfather’s garage when I was growing up. Today, I wrote down eighteen giants and drew circles around each one. I’ll see them every day and plan on praying for God’s light until the darkness fades in each one. When and if a giant is destroyed, I’ll paint over it. As long as giants remain, I’ll keep praying.

Challenge  

Write down the giants in your land – those troubles you may have lost hope will ever leave.

Ask yourself a really hard question. If that giant doesn’t leave, will I be okay? You may need to do some heart work and offer up an idol. (Anything besides God you must have to be okay) This is really hard work.

Next. Circle it up. Determine to earnestly pray for God’s light to penetrate the darkness.

Finally. In reflection, think about a giant which has left your land. Do you wish it had never come?

Novels by the Author:

Beyond Time

Hope Remains

Satisfying Joy

Choosing One Thing

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Can one thing be the key to everything else in life? Could it be the mainspring which provides continual joy and infuses power into every other area? Curly seems to think so.

Curly

In the movie city Slickers, Curly, an old crusty cowboy, claims to know the key to life. With a cigarette hanging out of his mouth, he asks Mitch, played by Billy Crystal, if he knows the secret of life. “No. What?” Mitch responds. Holding up one finger and smiling, Curly says “This.” “Your finger?” Mitch asks. Curly says “One thing. Just one thing.” He says if you stick with it, everything else means nothing. (Curly actually used a bit rougher language) “What’s the one thing?’ Mitch asks. “That’s what you have to figure out,” Curly answers. Mitch isn’t satisfied with Curly’s answer, but the old cowboy is on to something.

Jesus in the house

Luke tells us about a time Jesus was invited into Martha’s home. She had a sister named Mary who sat at Jesus‘s feet, listening to His words. Martha, on the other hand, was so focused on the preparations, she was distracted. She became resentful toward Mary and complained to Jesus. But like Mitch, she didn’t get the answer she desired. Martha, Martha you are anxious and troubled about so many things; but one things is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her. Luke 10:41-42 (ESV)

Distracted

I sympathize with Martha. She wanted Jesus to feel welcome. I can identify with feeling distracted (to be driven about mentally, to be over occupied, too busy). I can get so focused on what I’m doing, people fall from my radar. Why? As I ponder this with the Lord, I realize I’ve falsely believed  life has to be going well for me to be okay. When deadlines loom and stress builds, I can get distracted with what I’m doing, caring more about the duties than people. But God is showing me life going well can never be what makes me okay. This is a complete paradigm shift in the way I view each day. Like Martha, I can still become anxious and troubled by what needs to be done. But I’m learning to enjoy the Lord’s nearness as I work, seeing everything I do as an opportunity to love the people He places in my path. There’s real joy in that.

One Thing

Mary chose the one necessary thing. She was with Jesus, seated at His feet, listening; the posture of a disciple. As believers, Jesus indwells us by his Holy Spirit. He is with us, even while we carry out life’s duties. However, like Martha, we can allow what we’re doing to be the one thing. In the 1600s, Nicolas Herman served in the kitchen of a French monastery. Known for his intimacy with the Lord, he was given the name Brother Lawrence. His friends, complied a book of his letters and sayings, entitled Practice of the Presence of God. Nicolas learned to experience God in every aspect of life. He said he felt as close to God peeling potatoes as he did kneeling at the altar. Like Nicolas, Mary chose to focus on Jesus. She worshipped Him. She chose Him above all else – her sister’s approval, the food preparations, the cultural norm. Martha was dissatisfied with life.  Mary was satisfied with Jesus.

A Word for Martha

I long to be satisfied with Jesus, just like Mary. But I still identify with Martha. What can I learn from what Jesus said to her? “Martha, Martha.” Repeating her name was not a sign of frustration, but of intimacy. Jesus loved Martha. He loves us. He doesn’t want us anxious and troubled as we go about our duties.  He wants us focused and satisfied with Him. He doesn’t want us distracted with accomplishments, success and a smooth, happy life. All these things are fine, but they can’t bring contentment; only Jesus can.

Challenge

Identify a time you’ve felt anxious and troubled. Can you pin point why? Spend some time alone with the Lord pondering the event. Ask Him to reveal the source of your distraction. He’ll show you what you’ve chosen above Him. When He does, make a choice to surrender it to Him. Choose to be satisfied with Jesus alone. He wants us free to fully experience the joy and peace of His presence.

Prayer

 Lord, it’s so easy to get distracted. I can be clearly focused on You one moment and over busy and preoccupied the next. Show me how being focused on You doesn’t mean I’m neglecting what needs to be done. Like Brother Lawrence, help me experience your nearness just as much while I’m doing office work as when I’m quietly reading my Bible. Without you I flounder. Like Mary, I choose to sit at Your feet as Your disciple, listening to Your words, worshipping You every step of my day. This is my choice. Guide me and empower me I pray.  
Freedom from Idolatry

The Idol of Opinions 

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“You know that when you were still pagans, you were led astray and swept along in worshiping speechless idols.” ‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭12:2‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Have you ever been worried about what people think of you? Done something simply because you wanted somebody else to think well of you? How about doing something you know you shouldn’t have just to please another person?

Desiring others to think well of us is not a bad thing, but when we look to them to gauge our value, we’ve crossed the line.

Peter stopped eating with the gentiles when James and certain influential Jews were around. Afraid of what they would think, he acted like a racist. Paul sternly rebuked him.  (See Galatians 2:11-14)

Personally, I can relate with Peter. I’ve struggled with being concerned about what people think about me. Rather than loving selflessly, as Jesus commanded, I sometimes look for something in return from others. It’s like I “need” their approval.  This stems from a misplaced understanding of where my value comes from. I’m loved by the Creator of the universe with a love which surpasses knowledge. God’s love gives me my complete value.

But sometimes I lose sight of God’s love for me. Caught up in the swirl of life, I look to other relationships to give me what only He can. This is sin.  Using other’s to validate me is giving too much worth to their opinion. In essence I’m worshiping their opinion as an idol, making me an idolater.

Idolatry

The word Idol literally means “an image for worship.” A stark reality is that when I do anything to enhance another person’s opinion of me, I’m bowing down in worship to that person in my heart.

In quite spicy language, Paul puts our trying to please others this way:  “For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” ‭Galatians: ‬ ‭1:10‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Paul’s words add gravity to this sin of idolatry. But, praise be to God, Jesus Christ died to set us free from all sin. God wants us free.  There’s tremendous power in the cross of Christ to bring death to every sin.

“For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.” Romans 8:13 ESV

Though I’ve known about my struggles with pleasing others for a long time, dealing with it as sin and bringing it to the cross of Christ for mortification has brought tremendous freedom and lightness to my heart. I’m becoming more and more secure in Father God’s love for me. This frees me to love other’s as Christ has loved me, without expecting or needing anything back in return.

Prayer:  Lord, thank you so much for revealing this sin to me. When my flesh wants to walk in the old ways of gaining value from the opinion of others, please show me quickly that I might bring this idolatry to the cross and walk in your Spirit. “Now the Lord is the Spirit and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty.”

I know you want to show me more and more so that I can walk in the full freedom You’ve designed for me.  You are impressing upon me that my completeness is in Christ Jesus alone. I love the lightness of heart that the confession of sin brings. Please continue Your work in me. I love You and thank You for loving me so much.