Practicing the Presence of God, Staying Present with God

(In the Moments) Stay Present my Friends

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Savoring present moments becomes a catalyst for practicing the Presence of God.

“What do you think?” a voice interrupts your thoughts.

Suddenly you’re brought back to the present. Your spouse, your child, your friend has been sharing something important, but you were thinking about what was next on your never-ending to-do list. You have no idea what they just said. Busted!

On another occasion, you miss a magical moment on your family vacation because you’re dwelling on a regret from your past.

God has given us five senses to bring awareness of His creation around us. These senses are available now, not yesterday, not tomorrow, but now.

What are some of your favorites?

For me:

Sight: Sunset, or sunrise over water or mountains

Sound: Water rushing past rocks in a mountain stream

Smell: Tea olive, gardenias

Touch: Sea breeze, fall wind in my face, soft sheets

Taste: Chocolate pie, dark coffee

When we savor now, we’re enjoying a gift from God. A lady on a plane once told me that’s why “now” is called the present. It’s a gift.

This is the day which the Lord has made; Let us rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24 NASB)

Why do the Living not Understand?

There’s an old movie entitled Our Town which drives this point home.

One character, named Emily, dies while giving birth to a child. However, the stage manager allows her to go back to the past and observe the morning of her sixteenth birthday.

From her vantage point, she has a profoundly nostalgic appreciation of the transient beauty of life’s insignificant moments. However, she realizes that people, including her younger self, don’t understand how precious the moments of life really are. She is stunned that nobody savors and fully appreciates “now”. They all seem so disengaged. Later she would say of the living, “They don’t understand.”

Paul – “Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead.” (Philippians 3:13 NASB)

Jesus – “So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” (Matthew 6:34 NASB)

God doesn’t want us to be imprisoned by the regrets of our past or fears of our future. He wants us to be present with Him moment by moment.

Abiding is Staying Present with Jesus

Jesus tells us in John 15 to “abide” in Him. Other meanings of this word are to “tarry” or “stay present with.” Jesus says in the same chapter that there is complete joy found in “staying present” in His love and loving others as He has loved us.

Staying present with Jesus is essential to our spiritual lives, and it leads to experiencing and savoring life’s moments. Otherwise, life quickly passes us by.

Savoring present moments becomes a catalyst for practicing the Presence of God.

Quiddity

Of his friend, A. K. Hamilton Jenkins, Lewis wrote that he “seemed to be able to enjoy everything, even ugliness.” [1] From Jenkins’ example, Lewis learned to, “attempt total surrender to whatever atmosphere was offering at the moment; in a squalid town to seek out those places where it’s squalor rose to grimness and almost grandeur,”[2] He called this a “serious, yet gleeful determination to rub one’s nose in the very quiddity[3] of each thing, to rejoice in its being (so magnificently) what it was.”

What I learn from this is that in our endeavors to “enjoy” the nature of something and experience it with our senses, we notice the “good” and the “bad”.

Challenge

Take notice of what you see and hear right at this moment. Do you smell anything? Perhaps you’re drinking a cup of coffee and feel a gentle breeze upon your face like I’m experiencing as I write.

What calls you away from being fully present? Is it a looming duty, a past regret, a worry about the future? Whatever it is robs you of fully embracing the gift of now. Give these things to God and don’t take them back.

During life’s “nows,” we show love by caring for the people in our lives. In an instant, our present moments become memories. When we savor our times with the people God places in our path, there’s a richness which touches our hearts and slows the swirl of life.

But what’s most important is being present with God. The Holy Spirit of Jesus indwells us, and we are never alone. God is in us and around us. We are in Him and He is in us.

Tarry, remain, abide in Jesus. Now, we feel His presence.

In your presence is fullness of joy. Psalm 16:11b.

Prayer

Lord, I need you desperately on this one. I can determine with all my might to stay present, but my mind quickly wanders. By Your Indwelling Holy Spirit, please keep me in the moments of life, fully savoring all which surrounds me, receiving all things from Your hand. 

In my moments of now, my I, above all things, recognize Your nearness and show Your love to all You bring my way. May this be the overarching goal of every day, to receive Your love and give it away.

Amen

And now, O Lord, for what do I wait?  My hope is in you. (Psalm 39:7 NASB)

[1] Surprised By Joy, Harcourt, p. 199

[2] Ibid, p. 199

[3] From the Oxford Dictionary: Quiddity – the nature or essence of someone or something.

Other posts in our series In the Moments:

As Sea Gulls Fly

The Gift of Presence

It is Finished

Behold the Moments

Tranquility

Stop Striving

Simplicity In Christ

What is Good

Yet Will I Rejoice

Sorrowful, Yet Always Rejoicing

Exploring Grace and Joy together

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.

For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in an old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Joy Flowing From Grace

(In the Moments) The Remarkable Link Between Joy and Grace

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It’s a cool late summer morning. Fall is in the air.

As I sip my dark coffee, laced with sugar free peppermint mocha (not sure it’s good for me, but it is tasty), I listen to the sound of our man-made mountain brook outside the porch. A cool breeze whips across my face, carrying the scent of tea olives in full bloom. Looking up from my writing, I notice the multiple shades of green leaves awaiting the signal to change colors and float to the ground.

I’m in a very contemplative mood. In fact, I feel quite weary. There are plenty of tough circumstances to go around. We’ve had three deaths in our family in the last few years. Folks we love are struggling with addiction. Some don’t know Jesus. The thought of them facing an eternity without Him is sobering. So many are dealing with lost jobs, broken relationships and life-threatening illnesses.

Even though, in John 16:33, Jesus tells us this will be the case, it doesn’t make it easy to deal with such pain. “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (NIV)

Sometimes, when I remember the nearness of Jesus, He infuses me with the courage to handle these troubles. Other times, I get lost in the details and negative situations. I think it comes down to my perspective. When I can gain an eternal view, even during hard times, my outlook is different.

Right now, my heart is heavy, and I need God’s truth.

Turning to the Bible, I read a verse that if someone said it to me right now, I’d take it as a trite answer and consider them very insensitive.

It’s I Thessalonians 5:16 – “Rejoice Evermore.”

Rejoice Evermore! This unconditional command seems impossible. With all that’s going on, rejoicing is the last thing I want to do. But, since God said it, I’ll take this as an invitation to dig deeper, asking Him to show me how this is possible.

Lord, how is it possible to rejoice evermore?

To Obey God Requires Abiding Dependence Upon the Holy Spirit

Before digging into the verse more fully, I have to pause and admit my inability to obey any of God’s commands in my strength. After years of trying to be like Jesus without Jesus, I’m fully convinced the Christian life requires an abiding dependence upon the indwelling Holy Spirit of Jesus to fully follow Him.

Abiding is not just a delightful idea, it’s the essence of the Christian life. Paul summed it up beautifully in Galatians 2:20-21:  “I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.  I do not nullify the grace of God, for if righteousness comes through the Law, then Christ died needlessly.”

Our life now is a life of dying to self and yielding to the indwelling Holy Spirit. Christ gave Himself up for me and, if I revert to living independently, I’m nullifying His death for me.

Living a life of self-fueled “obedience” leads to burnout and deeper sin. “It’s all up to me” is a lie from the pit of hell. It’s prideful and sinful.

Learning what it means to rejoice evermore doesn’t differ from any other command. Yielding to the Holy Spirit within me is the only way to obey it.

What Does it Mean to Rejoice Evermore?

When Paul tells us to rejoice, he uses the Greek word “chairo,” which means to be cheerful, calmly happy, or well off, to be glad. The word “chairo” originates from the root word “charis,” which means grace or unmerited spiritual blessings granted to those who trust in Jesus Christ.

The Greek words for “rejoice” and “grace” share a close connection. Feeling joyful is a common response to receiving and experiencing God’s grace. One of the fundamental aspects of joy involves having faith and seeking peace in Christ’s righteousness, rather than focusing on my own achievements.

“Evermore” originates from the Greek term “pantoteh,” signifying always, or at all times. I’m to remain glad all the time because of the spiritual blessings God has freely given me. All times!

  •    When I’m grieving, my joy comes from God, fullness of all joy, and the grace He’s given me.
  •    When life is fun and my wife and I are loving hanging out with our grandkids and kids, my joy comes from God, fullness of all joy, and the grace He’s given me.
  •    When relations are strained or broken, my joy comes from God, fullness of all joy, and the grace He’s given me.
  •    When life seems stale and plain, my joy comes from God, fullness of all joy, and the grace He’s given me.
  •    When I’m afraid and worried, my joy comes from God, fullness of all joy, and the grace He’s given me.

I’m always living in a physical world, with actual trials, problems, and heartaches. So, if I am to make this command to “rejoice always” a legitimate part of my life, I can’t forget certain spiritual truths based on the “grace” or unmerited favor given to me.

Rejoicing in God’s Grace

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we would be holy and blameless before Him. In love He predestined us to adoption as sons through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, which He freely bestowed on us in the Beloved. In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace which He lavished on us.  (Ephesians 1:3-8a NASB).  

Rejoicing in God’s grace, shown to me in His love and sacrifice for my sins, sustains me and gives me courage.

 Before the world began, God Almighty chose to love me as His child. The cruel death of His Son Jesus, the Messiah, secured my eternal relationship with Him, my new Father. This was all done for the praise of God’s grace. He lavished His grace upon me, abounding and overflowing, manifested in the shedding of Jesus’ life blood.

This is how I rejoice evermore. Regardless of what I’m going through, the root of joy is God’s grace, expressed in His love. It happened before the world began, so nothing can change His grace for me today.

In God’s Grace, I Rejoice Evermore.

God’s grace gives me a peace which is greater than any circumstance I can face, including the very hard difficulties I face today.

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:6-7 NASB).

In my opinion whatever we may have to go through now is less than nothing compared with the magnificent future God has planned for us (Romans 8:18 J.B. Phillips Translation).

 Challenge

What is your current weariness? Can you name it? Or perhaps you’re in a season free of troubles. These are rare. Be extremely thankful.

For the rest of us, sink into the deep connection between God’s grace and our full joy. People never earn God’s grace, and it doesn’t change with each passing circumstance or human choice.

Ours is to choose His grace for our life, both now and forever.

With grace, as an unbelievably interlinked component of the same root word, there’s rejoicing.

28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30 NIV).

Come. With all that burdens your heart, come and stay with Jesus. It’s what He wants.

With Him, we have grace and full joy, which results in true rest for our souls.

Prayer

Despite the ongoing hard times and unresolved problems, I find joy in You, Lord, as Your word has given me courage. Please help me take each care and concern and cast them upon You because You care for me.

Please help me to stop striving to make everything “okay” in my world. Your nearness is my good. My hope and stability are in You. I rejoice in the grace You showed me before I was even born. And I know nothing can change that.

In You, and in Your love and grace, I rejoice evermore.

Amen

Other posts in our series In the Moments:

As Sea Gulls Fly

The Gift of Presence

It is Finished

Behold the Moments

Tranquility

Stop Striving

Simplicity In Christ

What is Good

Yet Will I Rejoice

Sorrowful, Yet Always Rejoicing

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.

For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in an old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Daily Rhythms, Discipleship

Packages (Epilogue, Walking it Out)

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Part 1 

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

The Dream Ends

Since I didn’t have to be at work until later that day, Alfred and I continued discussing the dream until 9:30. He found it encouraging too. Through our conversation, we established some daily routines:

  • As much as possible, begin each day with unhurried time with God
  • Talk with Him about who we know we’ll be encountering that day and ask Him to allow us, through His Sprit, to love each person, planned or not, with the same quality of love He loves us
  • Be prayerfully intentional about loving and leading our families, especially our wives
  • Be deliberate about being present during the moments of the day
  • Don’t look past people in order to return to duties
  • Continually cast each responsibility and care upon the Lord and trust Him to weed out what’s unnecessary
  • Orient our lives from the fact that we’ve been raised with Christ and are, even now, seated in heavenly places with Him
  • Find our joy and satisfaction in the Lord, not our circumstances and accomplishments
  • See each moment from an eternal perspective, being bold to explain our hope in Christ and to announce the Lord’s great mercy towards us

A Hundred Days Later

As much as I wanted it, the dream on the packages never returned, but the impression it made has grown stronger.

Alfred and I agreed to meet weekly to support each other in our daily routines. We weren’t perfect, but we managed to have unhurried times of solitude with Father God at least five times during most weeks.

We began our times along with God by praising Him, acknowledging His presence, and listening for His guidance. Although we didn’t follow the same Bible reading plan, due to different programs in our churches, we always shared at least one impactful truth from God’s word to uplift each other during our weekly breakfasts.

Aware of whom we might encounter each day, we established a rhythm of morning prayers and spontaneous prayers throughout the day. We sought to remain in Jesus’ love, relying on the Holy Spirit to help us love others with the same depth of love He has for us.

Additionally, we encouraged one another to create margin in our lives for unforeseen chances to show God’s lovingkindness.

We extended grace to each other when we fell short and ended each time in prayer.

Alfred excelled in the practice of being present throughout the day. He endeavored to employ all his senses while performing his duties as an administrative assistant at a large law firm. Whenever someone entered his office space, be it in person or electronically via phone, text, or email, he sought divine guidance on how to fully engage and serve each “customer”. He admitted that initially, it was challenging, and there were times he went half a day without a thought of God. However, he persisted, and during those gaps He thanked God when He was brought again to an awareness of His presence. Then he resolved to concentrate on maintaining his focus on Jesus as often as he could going forward,

I was more irregular in my practice of abiding, but Alfred’s encouragement led me to increasingly and consciously surrender to the Holy Spirit of God within me multiple times a day.

Passing it On

One morning, Alfred couldn’t hide his huge grin as Tammy, our regular waitress, poured our coffee. Tammy must be the finest server in the South. Alfred and I alternate paying for our weekly breakfasts, always leaving her generous tips. As a single mother and now a grandmother, she’s familiar with our routine and usual breakfast bowls, to the extent that, by 6:30 every Wednesday morning, our table was waiting for us and our condiments already laid out.

“Tammy,” Alfred said, as she finished pouring my coffee. “Set us up for four next week.”

“Okay,” she said with a smile. “The usual?”

We both nodded. Occasionally one of us will be enticed to go with chicken fried steak, eggs, grits or hashbrowns and grilled biscuits. But that usually happened when the other was paying.

When Tammy had gone, I asked Alfred what was up with the table for four.

“Apprenticeship,” Alfred began, “What if you wanted to become a bricklayer? And you knew of a master who had been a successful bricklayer for years and years. What would you do first to learn how to follow his path?”

I thought for moment and then replied. “First, I’d want to be with him as much as possible during the workday to watch him, learning to become like him in his brick laying methods.”

“Great answer,” Alfred replied, his grin getting even larger. “Then what?”

“Eventually, I’d begin laying brick on my own doing what he did.” 

“Exactly!” Alfred said, as Tammy brought our bowls and refilled our coffee. “And that’s the answer to your question.”

“What question?” I asked as I poured white pepper gravy on my bowl and passed the deliciousness to Alfred.

“Your question of why I asked Tammy to set four places next week,” Alfred answered. “You and I have been intentional about being with Jesus alone and meeting together to talk about our experiences. By the power of the Holy Spirit, we’ve sought to be like Jesus, praying for each other along the way.

“We’ve sought to follow Him as His disciples.  I believe the next step in our apprenticeship is to do what He’s taught us to do to others. [2]

“I have a young man I work with who recently decided to believe in Christ’s finished work for his salvation. And I’d like to ask him to join us, if you’re okay with that.”

“Sure,” I answered. “But what about me? Who could I ask?”

“How about your son?”

[1] John 15: 9-12

[2] The concept of apprenticeship is from the book Practicing the Way by John Mark Comer, Copyright 2024 by WaterBrook Publishing.

 

Joy in the Journey is about the

gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.
For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

 

Turning the To-Do List on its Head

Packages (The Dream Ends)

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Part 1 

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

Then I awoke, not on the packages, but in my own bedroom. Beside me, my wife, whose name isn’t Jill, was still sleeping. I’d experienced a lucid dream spanning a week, yet in reality, it was only a few hours.

It was predawn. I dressed, brewed a cup of Cuban coffee and proceeded to the porch, my favorite place to watch the sun rise.

I took out my journal and detailed the events and individuals from the seven days encompassed by the dream. The scenarios and characters were fictitious. However, some elements were familiar.

I don’t have a neighbor named Alice. Nevertheless, I’ve engaged in discussions with colleagues, in my field of IT, about Jesus and Him not being religious. 

I don’t have a friend named Fred suffering from pancreatic cancer, but I do have several close friends who are facing serious illnesses.

I don’t have friends named Sammy and Milly with a son named Alton, but I wish I did.

I don’t have a co-worker named Kevin facing personal challenges and showing interest in my faith. However, I do work closely with someone I pray will stop believing God and science can’t co-exist.

I don’t have colleagues like Harrison and Mike who desire to inflict as much pain on me as possible, but I have a person, who is closer than a co-worker, who seems to have that agenda.

As the sun started to tint the grey sky with soft pastels, I jotted down the themes that came to me while I rested on the packages. 

During the seven days of dreams, as I listened to His voice, I learned:

  • To love others as Christ loves me
  • To converse with God, who is ever-present, and to listen as I go
  • That He will guide me in loving each person He places in my path
  • To fully “see” people around me and not quickly move past people to the next obligation
  • To yield to His kindness as I love
  • That my life is brimming with the abundant grace of God
  • That I am appointed as an ambassador of Christ to convey His grace
  • To always be prepared to discuss the Hope of Christ within me
  • That difficulties, such as Fred’s cancer, are not surprises to God
  • To recall God’s love for me during tough times
  • Not to gauge my happiness by my circumstances
  • That individuals like Alton, with special needs, bring extraordinary joy
  • When I seek comfort from God, He endows me with joy and courage
  • That I possess no righteousness of my own, only the righteousness of Christ

By then the sun was in full view and I knew exactly what I needed to do. I called my spiritual mentor, Alfred. He agreed to meet me for breakfast.

After ordering our usual bowls of grits, poached eggs, crumbled bacon, and biscuits, I shared the dream with him. Confident in his wisdom, I believed he could provide some meaningful insights.

I also shared with him the notes I’d written earlier that morning.

He was patient as I recounted my story, asking a few clarifying questions.  Afterwards, I asked him for his overall thoughts and possible interpretation. 

Alfred paused a moment, then said, “Your times on the packages seem like a picture of our position in the heavenlies with Christ. The timeless dawn, vivid colors, and what I’m calling an ocean of love, give me a sense of what heaven must be like. I had goose bumps as I listened.

“Reminds me of verses like Colossians 3:1-4, and Ephesians 2:4-7 where it speaks of believers being raised with Christ and seated with Him in heavenly places. Your dream gave me a glimpse of being with Christ in heaven, yet still living on earth.

“This is a real gift, Bobby. You’ve been given an eternal peek into our heavenly position, an almost “real life” perspective of what Paul meant when he commanded us to set our minds on things above, not on temporal things. [1]

“What do you think the packages represent?” he asked.

“At first, I thought it was up to me to deliver them all, I responded. “That speaks to how full of duties my life feels. I can be so busy that people, and opportunities to love, can seemed like obstacles to taming the task list. But now I’m realizing much of my to-do list is from me and not God.  

“Those packages are not tasks, they’re bundles of God’s love: His kindness, His peace, His joy, His presence to be given as presents to others.

“Though I’m very saddened at how I’ve been, I can hear you tell me that God’s mercies are new every morning.” 

Alfred nodded.

My eyes began to sting as I continued, “Alfred, I’ve waisted so much of my life striving to fill a bottomless chasm in my heart that screams – ‘I’m not enough.’

“Though in my head, I’ve known it’s about Christ’s righteousness, my heart hasn’t caught up yet. It believed it was up to me to earn His love, to succeed, to please.

“Until now,” I said, a spark of joy rising in my heart. “Because of the gift of a dream, my whole world has been turned upside down. 

“Alfred, you’ve patiently loved me and guided me all these years. You know how distracted I’ve been.”

Alfred smiled and nodded.

“This dream has turned my to-do list on its head. My duties are no longer the main thing. My goal now is to love. 

“I feel so much more present. I want to truly see the Sammys God brings my way and not just pass them by to check off another task on my never-ending task list.

“No! Completing my tasks without problems is no longer my main goal. Delivering God’s daily packages of love is what I want to be about. 

“I’ll trust Him to get done what needs to get done. The tasks are now simply the paths God uses to bring me to the folks He wants me to love.”

Alfred laughed with joy. I knew at that moment it’s what he’d been praying for me all these years.

Stay Tuned for The Epilogue, Walking it Out. 

[1] Colossians 3:1-4

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.
For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

 

Joy in Trials

(In the Moments) Sorrowful yet always Rejoicing

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Sorrowful yet always rejoicing (II Corinthians 6:10)

I was teaching a two-week interim class at the Governor’s School of Science and Mathematics. My mom had been complaining of abdominal pain for a few weeks. We hoped it was her diverticulitis, but when antibiotics didn’t clear it up, the doctors talked about something more serious. They scheduled exploratory surgery the day I was finishing up my class.

I hadn’t heard anything when the class ended, so I headed home along a dark rural road.  Suddenly my car lost all power. Navigating to the narrow shoulder of the road, a massive eighteen-wheeler whizzed by shaking the car.

My cell phone rang. It was my wife. Mom had a form of stage 3 ovarian cancer. Hanging up the phone, I felt numb.

But then a strange peace welled up deep in my soul. A sense of God’s presence filled me with unusual joy. Not the kind of joy which would cause glad shouting. But it was a firm realization that because God was with me everything was okay.

I learned from this experience that being okay is not a matter of circumstances always working out. Being okay is about us being with God and Him being with us.

A few months later my mother would die. However, the Lord used Isaiah 43 to speak to her heart about being redeemed.

But now, thus says the Lord, your Creator, O Jacob,
And He who formed you, O Israel,
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name; you are Mine!
2 “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
And through the rivers, they will not overflow you.
When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched,
Nor will the flame burn you (Isaiah 43:1-2)

Before then, she’d always ask me if she’d lived a good enough life to go to heaven. No matter how many times I reminded her that our “good life” doesn’t get us to heaven, she’d ask me the same thing later. But then God enlightened her heart with the truth. She understood Jesus had lived that “good life” for her and had redeemed her soul for eternity. She trusted in Jesus for her salvation before she died. This brings me unspeakable joy.

Challenge

No matter what you are going through right this moment, joy is available in God’s presence. He is our Comforter. Call Him near. Verbally or in writing, seek the Lord as you tell Him what you’re going through.

Sustaining joy can never be found in our circumstances. This world has many troubles.

Joy is found in the presence of God.

Behold Him and He will BE your strength and joy.

Prayer

Lord, thank You that, in spite of very difficult circumstances, You made me aware of Your joyful presence. It’s so easy for me to try and find joy in my circumstances and feelings. Thank You that you give me a deep rock-solid joy which is unaffected by ANYTHING I face. Please keep me aware that You are my Delight, my Joy, my life. AMEN.

Other posts in our series In The Moments:

As Sea Gulls Fly

The Gift of Presence

It is Finished

Behold the Moments

Tranquility

Stop Striving

Simplicity In Christ

What is Good

Yet Will I Rejoice

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.

For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in an old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Rest

Packages (Part 7)

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Part 1 

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

The next morning on the packages the events of the previous day swirled in my soul.  I checked with Kevin after Alice’s party, and he predicted the batches would be completed by early evening.

Alice’s party was hard for me. I’m not a good chit-chatter with folks I don’t know very well. I did have a good conversation with one of Alice’s grandson’s Jeff, who’s studying Computer Science at the University of South Carolina.

His eye’s widened when I told him about carrying around punch cards for writing COBOL programs back in the late 70s. Things have changed so much Jeff wasn’t even sure what COBOL was.

“It stands for Common Business Oriented Language,” I explained. “It was developed by Admiral Grace Hopper. COBOL emerged 1959.  and it’s still used a lot today in banking, insurance, and other large data industries.”

As I shared my enthusiasm about computing history with Jeff, I could see his eyes beginning to glaze over. I shifted the conversation and asked some questions about him.

Then he surprised me, “Granny says you’re a religious person, is that right?”

Simultaneously, I heard. “Be very real.”

“Actually, I’m not, Jeff.”

I could tell my answer took him back. I was ready to say more, but heard, “Wait. Give him space to process and respond.”

After a moment, he said, “But I thought you went to church a lot.”

“I do, but that doesn’t make me religious,” I replied. “Growing up, I saw religious people as judgmental, fun zapping and stuffy, so I avoided them.”

“I don’t understand,” Jeff replied. “How can you go to church and avoid religious people?”

I went on to explain that religion is following rules, Christianity is following a Person, Jesus Christ. I told him there are two ways to get to heaven; be perfect or be carried in by Someone who is. 

He seemed very interested and asked a lot of questions, especially about what Christ’s crucifixion really meant.

I gave him some passages to read and showed him how to get the Bible app on his phone. He was amazed when I told him how Jesus was not a religious person either.

“In fact,” I said. “Take a look at Matthew 23:1-12. You’ll see how angry Jesus was at the religious leaders of his time. They were all about rule following, not God following.”

It was a nice conversation, but I had a restless night thinking about all that was going on.

As I continued to think about the day before, I heard Him say, “Rest. Bobby, you are worried and bothered by many things,”

Recognizing that these were the words, Jesus said to Martha in Luke 10:38-42, I responded, “But only one thing is needed.”

In the story of the two sisters, I’d always identified with the busy older sister, named Martha. But I’d longed to be like Mary, who sat at Jesus’ feet listening to His words.

Mary cared more about Jesus than accomplishments.

I wanted to be like Mary, but I was much more like Martha.

“You can be like Mary, but you must trust Me deeply,” He responded to my thoughts.

How?

“To be like Mary, thoughts of yourself must end; thoughts of doing, thoughts of pleasing, thoughts of measuring up must be replaced by trust; trust in what My Son did on the cross. He did it all for you. He brought you back from annihilation. He freed you. He completed you. He is worth all your attention.

When you do, He’ll take care of everything else.”

He said no more that morning. 

Later, Sammy and Milly joined us for church. The sermon was on Psalm 27, particularly verse 4.

Again, I would hear about “one thing.”

One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I shall seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
To behold the beauty of the Lord
And to meditate in His temple.

“How’d you like the sermon,” Jill asked Sammy and Milly, as we enjoyed our lunch at Lizard’s Thicket after church.

“I liked the focus on worship,” Sammy replied.

“Yes,” Milly chimed in. “Could life really be as simple as the one thing of worshipping God? What about all the things we have to do? We can’t just forget about them.”

“I’ve thought the same thing,” Jill added. “I was reading about this verse in a book about worshiping. The author mentioned that David’s one thing of desiring God above everything else was the mainspring for everything else in his life, his commanding, his ruling, his writing, everything.” [1]

“Wow, that makes a lot of sense,” said Sammy. “That softens the conflict in my head. Like the story of Mary and Martha and how Jesus told Martha that one thing is needed.” 

I couldn’t believe what was happening. The very thing I heard on the packages that morning, was playing out before my eyes in a deep conversation. I was about to mention the packages for the first time to anyone, when my phone vibrated.

Glancing at my watch, I saw it was Kevin.

“Excuse me,” I said. “I need to take this.”

As I stepped outside and answered the phone, I heard, “Rest.”

“You okay,” I asked.

“Not at all,” Kevin exclaimed tersely. “I knew you were at church and wanted to be sure our process was still going. On my way in, I passed Mike driving away. I don’t think he saw me.

“When I got upstairs, the server was off. When I rebooted, I was able to restart the remaining batches. But the abrupt termination of the one which was running has corrupted a large block of data. And it was for the new client.”

I tried to console Kevin, but he came unglued. He was going to resigned on the spot, but I told to hold on until I got there

To Be Continued

[1] How to worship Jesus Christ  by Joseph S. Carrol, pages 22-26

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Nonfiction books by the Author:

Because joy is rooted in God and is eternal, it doesn’t ebb and flow with the waves of circumstances. In fact, as we grow in our understanding of joy, we can even experience it more acutely when life is hard. Why? Because God uses trials to conform us into the image of Christ. With this awareness, which gives us glimpses of God’s greater purposes, we rejoice because of His masterful work to free us from needing anything but Him.
For these reasons, and many others, joy in the Lord is commanded in scripture. It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to our journey as human beings. Rhythms of Joy

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

 

Choosing Joy, Eternal Joy, Joy in Trials

(In the Moments) Yet will I Rejoice in the Lord

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Wrightsville beach. One of our favorite places to get away and replenish. The warmth of the sun, the cool breeze of the mornings, the constant rhythmic sound of the surf, the expanse of the ocean against the light blue horizon. Delightful. A small butterfly lands on my bride’s finger, a kiss from her Father in a moment when love was hidden.

For most of my life, I’ve seen problems as negative. However, I’m learning a new perspective.

James tells us to, “count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds in trials,” [1] but these verses, and others like it, are hard to get my heart around. Trials, hardships and problems don’t seem to correlate with joy.

In the time of Habakkuk, the Lord brought forth the Chaldeans, mounted on horses faster than leopards; horsemen intent on violence, descending like eagles to consume. [2] Yet, He bestowed strength upon Habakkuk, lifting him to elevated places beyond the conflict. From this vantage point of divine insight, he proclaimed his resolve to find joy in the Lord, regardless of circumstances.

Though the fig tree should not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines, the produce of the olive fail and the fields yield no food, the flock be cut off from the fold and there be no herd in the stalls, Yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will take joy in the God of my salvation.  God, the Lord, is my strength; He makes my feet like the deer’s; He makes me tread on my high places.  (Habakkuk 3:17-19 ESV)

This is the perspective we all need in the midst of troubles we know will come. On the night before he died, Jesus said, “In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world” (John 16:33b NASB).

God has used some of our recent difficulties to teach me to cling desperately to Him. In each hardship, I’m discovering more of Him. l haven’t liked these troubles, but I’m learning that Joy can sustain me, if I invite Him in.

On the ride to the beach, we listened to a message from Graham Cooke [3] called the Language of Heaven. Cooke mentions that with every problem there are built in opportunities to experience God more fully. He says we should ask the question – What aspect of God can I realize now that I couldn’t have without this situation? He mentions that Joy always accompanies our experiences with God; the Lord is fullness Joy. [4] Cooke challenges us to begin and end each day with celebration.

I want to live my life this way, like Habakkuk, always looking to the Lord for my strength. I want to rejoice in the Lord always, even in situations which can be like nightmares. I want to walk with Him on the high places of His eternal perspective, orienting my life around a story which is far more important than my pleasant circumstances.

God is at work for our good. When we read Romans 8:28 and 29, we get a glimpse of His measure of good. It’s not just peaceful easy feelings. Our good is to be conformed into the image of Christ. 28 And we know that [a]God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. 29 For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son, so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren;

Being conformed into something can be painful, yet God is dependable. He is actively working to liberate us, and He will not cease His work within us. His love for us is too great to allow our happiness to be dependent on the circumstances of our lives.

Challenge

Can you say along with Habakkuk, “yet will I rejoice in the Lord?”

At this moment, in your present story, what comes before the “yet”?

Spend a few minutes documenting what has been particularly hard lately. When you’re done write out a “yet will I rejoice in You” prayer to your Father. This act is choosing joy and inviting the God of all comfort [5] into whatever you’re going through.

Prayer

Lord, right now I celebrate you. In the midst of very hard situations which linger, I seek You. You’re teaching me that Your love completes me. Being loved by you is my identity. You are all I need, my Peace, my Hope, my Joy. Please teach me to look at each new problem as an opportunity to be “upgraded” [6] into a deeper experience with You. I know, in Your sovereignty, You will provide “opportunities” for me to depend on You more; You’ve entrusted them to me. Please help me see all of life, especially the hard times, from Your viewpoint and trust in Your greater good for me. 

I love you dearly.

Amen

 [1] James 1:2

[2] Habakkuk 1:6-9

[3] Graham Cooke, The Language of Heaven – https://youtu.be/mi6nZA2wUqo

[4] Psalm 16:11b

[5] II Corinthians 1:3-7

[6] Word used by Graham Cooke.

Other posts in our series In The Moments:

As Sea Gulls Fly

The Gift of Presence

It is Finished

Behold the Moments

Tranquility

Stop Striving

Simplicity In Christ

What is Good

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family. Hope Remains

The Righteousness of God

Packages (Part 6)

Leave a comment 
Dear reader, Packages is an allegory. There will be roughly a dozen parts before Bobby wakes up from a very long, lifelike dream. He'll then seek an interpretation.

Part 1 

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

I found myself on the packages again on Saturday, with no body of water in sight. I sat deep in a valley, surrounded by towering piles of boxes. The rising sun remained hidden from view; its presence only hinted at by the pastel hues of dawn. The location matched my mood.

The sobering events of the previous day made me cringe as they seeped into my groggy consciousness. As troubling as the work situation was, I was more concerned about not being reconciled with Jill. Over the years, we’d learned to navigate through difficulties, particularly when one could sense the other’s reaction stemmed from unresolved past hurts. Together, with faith in God, we’d learned to reveal and dismantle the longstanding falsehoods that had troubled our lives. It was rare for us to sleep without settling our differences and kissing. The previous night was particularly challenging because we both reacted from deep-seated pain and failed to extend grace before the day’s end. I knew it was my responsibility to lead in that regard, but I hadn’t.

I recalled His words that the packages were brimming with kindness, grace, and love—qualities I desperately needed to embrace the day ahead. Accepting His grace proved particularly challenging. Especially in light of how I’d failed to lead Jill and, with my growing unforgiveness and bitterness with Mike.

Even so, I was certain nothing could separate me from God’s love, not even my own shame.

I contemplated the Hebrew word “Hesed,” which translates to lovingkindness.

And Psalm 23 verse 6: Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

I recalled that this word embodies a divine love which transcends human understanding; like how God pursues us, in spite of our disobedience. Like how Hosea pursued Gomer, his harlot wife. [1]

Immersed in a deep awareness of His lovingkindness, my heart grew tender. I longed to embrace Jill and admit my mistake. We never do well when we’re not right with each other. 

“There’s something else in these boxes,” He said, again catching me off guard. “You’re absorbing more than just kindness, grace and love.”

“Read II Corinthians 5:21.”

I picked up the Bible resting on the box in front of me and read, He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.

“Can you guess what else you’ve been soaking in?” He asked.

“The righteousness of Christ Jesus?”

“Very good. Can that righteousness be diminished by anything you do or don’t do?” 

I paused a moment before answering. A new understanding was budding in my heart. “No. Since You chose me, by Your mercy, to be Your son before I was even born, nothing I do or don’t do can affect it. Right?”

 “That’s right,” He said. “My children know this, but our enemy is relentless in seeking to hide My grace and love. His efforts are multiplied as his end draws near. Bobby, sometimes you still soak in his lies and not My truth”

“What did Paul say about righteousness in Ephesians 6?”

“He told us to put on the breastplate of righteousness, as we gird our loins with truth and take up the shield of faith.” I felt faith rising and continued. “This allows us to extinguish all the flaming missiles of the evil one. All of them!”

“Never drop your shield of faith. Believe you have My righteousness. No matter what happens, stay the course.”

Having rekindled my faith, He left me to my reflections. The shame I felt now appeared absurd. I knew my life was meant to be rooted in His righteousness, not my own. I realized that whenever I lost focus on this truth, I was on shacky ground and very vulnerable.

Unbeknownst to me, I was no longer in a valley; the mound of packages I rested on had ascended beyond the horizon. I was now in full view of a crystal blue sea, which reflected the magnificence of the eternal dawn.

Jill and I were able to have a cup of coffee together before I went to the office. I apologized for acting out of my fear of failure and need to succeed. I also told her I was sorry for not initiating forgiveness the night before. 

“I forgive you on both counts,” she said, as we hugged. “I’m not sure I was ready to be resolved last night anyway. I was stewing in my own feelings of rejection. But I recognized this morning that these lies are ancient. I’m sorry too. God has used you to help me see the lies from the past I still tend to live in.”

“I’m glad,” I said. “Us honoring our covenant of marriage before God has been what’s held us together and allowed our love to grow. We’ve had some very hard stretches.”

She agreed.

As I entered the office, I heard, “Ask Me.”

I found Kevin at his desk, his head in his hands, same shirt on from the day before. “The batches of data are two large,” he said in a defeated tone when he noticed me. “I tried dividing them into smaller datasets, but they lose the associated header, footer and provider tags. I’m out of ideas.”

I’d never seen Kevin in such a state. His perseverance and determination were remarkable, but he was clearly at the end of his rope.

Remembering His message, I asked Him for guidance. Then I ran through different possibilities in my mind.

“I have an idea,” I said after a few minutes. “I think I can use Easytrieve, a mainframe programming tool, to generate smaller datasets while preserving the tags. This would mean we’d be handling smaller batches during the data transfer and the script processing.”

Kevin thought it was a good idea and assisted me in mapping the fields. In forty-five minutes, we’d successfully written a quick program and validated the theory with a batch of data which had previously abended. 

“Eureka!” Kevin exclaimed. We did a computer nerd version of a high five.

 We kicked off a batch of scripts, which we hoped would process all the data by early Sunday afternoon. He showed me how to check for problems in his script and how to monitor the progress remotely.

I sent him home to rest and made sure the first few batches were successful.

When I got home, Jill was wrapping Alice’s surprise birthday gift.

The plan was for us to distract Alice in the backyard while friends and family streamed into her house to surprise her. 

“I can hide her present in the bottom of my purse,” Jill exclaimed. 

“I knew that giant bag would come in handy for something,” I joked, earning me a playful elbow to the ribs.

I was so excited about our gift to Alice. Knowing his days on earth were winding down, her husband, Ray, had asked me to video a message to his family. Jill and I downloaded it to an electronic picture frame, which was our present to Alice and their kids. 

Right before we knocked on the back door, my phone vibrated with a text. Jill heard it too and looked at me with disappointment.

“Is it work?” she exclaimed bitterly.

The extensive time and mental energy I devoted to work-related activities over the years had become a longstanding source of pain and feelings of neglect for Jill. I endeavored to understand my wife better, continually learning more about her. I was beginning to realize that some of her reactions stemmed from deep-seated pain, some of which originated in her childhood and was triggered by something I did, said, or failed to do. While I acknowledge that I have also caused her pain, I was learning not to take it personally all the time. This approach helped me to remain non-defensive, at least some of the time. Which is hard for a guy like me who thrives to succeed and please people.

“No, it’s Sammy,” I replied, also happy it wasn’t work related. “He’s asking if he and his family can join us at our church tomorrow.”

“Wow! That would be great,” Jill exclaimed. “Alton as well?”

“I’m not sure,” I replied, as I knocked on Alice’s back door. I heard, “Be bold.“

To Be Continued

[1] The book of Hosea

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

 

The Lord our Courage

Packages (Part 5)

3 Comments 
Dear reader, Some of you have asked where this Packages series is going. It's an allegory. There will be resolution and interpretation.

Part 1 

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

As I found myself resting on the packages the next morning, I wondered again if I was experiencing a long dream. If so, I hoped it would end soon. I had so many questions.

How did my time resting on these packages each morning seem to fuel my interaction with people that day.? How could cardboard boxes cause me to be filled with a quality of love which seemed out of this world? It had to be Him and not the packages.

Though I saw packages addressed to each person, I never remembered physically handing them to anyone. Was delivery really about the interaction and not the actual packages?

I did get my job back, but with conditions. I was put on probation and warned not to “push” my faith on anyone. I wasn’t sure what that meant, but I didn’t trust Mike enough to ask him. 

I determined to still offer to pray with folks as the opportunity arose. And if asked, I would explain the reason for my hope to anyone. Resting on the packages, I felt certain of this. I hoped I’d stand firm when opportunities for boldness arose.  

I didn’t want to regret not allowing the light of Jesus to shine through me.

Then He spoke. This time, my anger at Fred’s cancer was not within me. Being with Sammy and Alton had given me a new perspective.

Reading my thoughts, He said, “You are learning my son. Like Sammy, like Fred, God sized problems are meant to prove you can’t. And when you see that, you learn that I can.

“What did Paul write in II Corinthians 1:8-9?”

I picked up the Bible resting on the box in front of me and read, “For we do not want you to be unaware, brethren, of our affliction which came to us in Asia, that we were burdened excessively, beyond our strength, so that we despaired even of life; 9 indeed, we had the sentence of death within ourselves so that we would not trust in ourselves, but in God who raises the dead;”

“What was Paul going through?” He asked.

“So many difficulties that he despaired of his life. I guess he’d come to the end of his strength.”

“Exactly, you’ve read in other places what he endured.  [1] So you have an idea of what it might have been. What was his conclusion?” 

“He realized since the situation was beyond his abilities to endure, trusting in himself was no longer an option. He had to learn to trust in You.”

“That’s right,” He said. “Can you relate?”

I could. Several situations came to mind, including our difficulties with our oldest child. I remember thinking once, when that and other problems seemed to multiple, that if I knew where to go to give up, I would. I wasn’t suicidal, but like Paul, I’d come to the end of me.

Again, reading my thoughts, He said, “You made a wise choice back then. You could have wasted the pain by trying to numb it, but you brought it all to Me.” 

It was Friday.  The end of a very weird week. I was hoping Mike had assigned someone to handle my duties. Otherwise, it was going to be a long weekend. I imagined Kevin would have been given some of my tasks, but he had his own work to do.

Kevin looked up from his cubicle when I arrived and followed me into my office. 

I heard, “Be courageous.”

After discussing the current work load, Kevin said, “I’ve been thinking about what you said on Monday. I really appreciated you trusting me enough to tell me about the times of despair you’ve experienced. You alluded to a deep hope which lifted you from your discouragement. As I’ve told you before, I’m not a religious person, but I respect your opinion and would love to hear more. The situation with Clarissa has me pretty down.”

I had no idea I’d be tested about being bold with my faith so quickly. I told him I’d love to tell him what happened and the reason for my hope. We agreed to have lunch on Monday.

When Kevin walked out of my office, Mike came in. I wondered if he’d been outside listening. I heard, “Keep your peace.” 

Mike said nothing about my being with Kevin. He seemed to be only interested in work. We’d gotten a new client, so work had gotten dangerously backlogged. He was getting pressure from the top to get caught up or risk breaking contracted deliverables with our customers. He told me he expected us to be caught up by Monday morning. When he said “us” I grumbled in my spirit about what part of “us” he was doing. 

When Mike left, I could feel my stomach begin to twist.

During the next couple of hours, I was able to get a handle on how much work had to be done. It was massive. I could see myself missing my Friday date night with Jill and Alice’s surprise party on Saturday. I’d invited Fred and his wife to church with us, seems I’d miss that too. 

I heard a knock. It was Kevin. I glanced at my watch and was astonished it was already time for break. I’d always told Kevin it was important to take breaks, but this time I wanted to renege. 

In the canteen, I explained my conversation with Mike to Kevin. He already knew some of it. “Mike came to me on Wednesday and tried to hand off a ton of work to me. I think they hoped I’d be able to pick right up and handle it,” Kevin began. “I got started but have questions and needed your help. So, I reported that back to Mike. In the meantime, I’ve been playing around with a Visual Basic script we could possibly use to scrape the data from the mainframe and then kick off our processes. I’ve had some success, but need some procedural direction.”

After hearing Mike’s interaction with Kevin, I felt more like I was being used. I certainly didn’t feel like anyone in management really cared. Were they allowing me to work just to solve the present crisis? I felt insecure.

For the rest of the day I feed Kevin information to further fine tune his script. By days end, we had it working on a small sample. However, when we tried it on a batch of larger data, we kept getting region abends. Even after we maxed out the value, there was no success. I was getting a sinking feeling.

When I noticed it was approaching 6pm, and said, “Let me call Jill and cancel our date.”

Kevin stopped me. He had some ideas he wanted to try. He couldn’t get over the fact that we still dated after over forty years of marriage and he didn’t want us to miss it. We agree to reconvene in the morning.

When I pulled into our driveway to pick Jill up, I heard. “Cast your cares on Me.” They were fine words, but my heart couldn’t receive them.

Jill and I had a nice Italian dinner at one of our favorite spots. Then we walked across the dam at sunset, one of our favorite things to do. I tried to stay present, but she could tell I was preoccupied. I resisted the temptation to check on how Kevin was doing, but my lack of truly being “with” Jill hurt her. This resurfaced some unresolved bitterness toward me.

Then, her disappointment in me stirred up a deep failure place in my soul and I became defensive. Not a good posture for a loving date.

To top it off, I got a late text from Kevin saying he was going home with little success. He suspected a memory leak, but he needed some time away to ponder a solution.

Without Kevin’s script, I could work the next 48 hours and come well short of what Mike and his directors were expecting. 

Jill and I went to bed back to back and unresolved. The knots in my stomach were only growing tighter as I tried to sleep.

To Be Continued

[1] II Corinthians 11:23-33

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

 

Robby Buck

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family Hope Remains

 

God is our Reward, The Goodness of God

In the Moments (What is Good?)

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I’m on our back porch enjoying the breeze of a chilly spring morning. The flowers are blooming, the trees are just beginning to bud and the grass is greening. I’m soaking in the spender of “now”.  A few birds visit our feeder suspended above the wooded path to our barn. A steady flow of cascading water from our fountain forms the background rhythm for their melodious songs.

I rest in the goodness of God. When I’m present with Him, the troubles of my life are out of view. Because He’s good, I’m good.

However, when I remember my present difficulties, if I’m not careful, they can suck the good right out of me.

Psalm 73 tells a story of a man  who’s dealing with a crisis of belief. Things are not going well and he really doesn’t know what to do.

When the Psalm opens up, Asaph is in a bad way. He doesn’t like his circumstances. He’s come close to stumbling and almost slips. He feels as if he’s wasted his time keeping his heart pure. He feels stricken all day long and chastened every morning.

To add to his unrest, envy has crept in. He sees wicked people who are prideful and arrogant, yet they seem to be doing fine.  They’re not in trouble or plagued. They prosper and are even fat, which was considered a good thing back then.

Asaph feels embittered and pierced within, yet he makes a wise choice. He brings his confused mindset honestly before God.

When I pondered to understand this,
It was troublesome in my sight
17 Until I came into the sanctuary of God … (Psalm 73:16-17a NASB).

This is the key to what happens next. No matter what our state, no matter how badly we’ve screwed up, no matter how angry we are at God, we should follow Asaph’s example and enter God’s sanctuary.

God is always ready to hear where we are and the honest condition of our hearts. He can handle whatever we want to dish out. The worse thing we can do is shy away from Him because of shame, guilt or disappointment.

As Asaph talks to God, his heart begins to shift. Though his feelings haven’t changed, he sees the end of those who don’t follow God.  Then I perceived their end. Surely You set them in slippery places; You cast them down to destruction (Psalm 73:17b-18 NASB).

Then in verses 23 and 24, a dramatic turn occurs. Talking to God he says, Nevertheless,  I am continually with You. You have taken hold of my right hand and with Your council will guide me, and afterwards receive me to glory.

Whatever pit we find ourselves in right this moment, whatever evidence we see around us that life is not good, we can repeat Asaph’s words above in sincerity to God, releasing our lives into His care.

How reassuring! This truth can completely change our perspective as well.

It did for Aspah. See what he wrote next in verse 25.

Whom have I in heaven but you? And beside you I desire nothing on earth.

By bringing his concerns to God, even his complaints, the Lord performed a 180 degree shift in Asaph’s heart.

Let’s recognize, as Asaph did, that goodness is not in how our lives are going. Goodness is in God’s nearness. God is always with us and He is always good, no matter what goes on in our lives.

Asaph ended his Psalm with bedrock truth we can build our lives around.

 But as for me, the nearness of God is my good (Psalm 73:28a NASB).

Challenge:

What circumstance threatens your sense of well-being this very moment? In other words, what has to be right in your life for you to be okay: a thriving marriage, prospering children, successful career, etc. All these good things can never replace the fact that we are good because God is good. Place the Lord above all things. He is worthy. He is trustworthy. He is good.

Prayer:

Lord, I’m sorry I often slip back into seeking my “okayness”  from the circumstances of this world. I’ve asked You to help me to surrender more and more of my life to You. You’re answering this prayer, often with trials I would have never asked for. But, through it all I’m good because You are good and You are near.

Thank You.

With all my love, Amen.

Other posts in our series In The Moments:

As Sea Gulls Fly

The Gift of Presence

It is Finished

Behold the Moments

Tranquility

Stop Striving

Simplicity In Christ

Joy in the Journey is about the gladness of God’s nearness in the midst of life’s adventures.

Subscribe below to get email notifications of new posts. We post a few times a month. Thank you for reading. 

Please Check out the  Cola City Podcast . Discussions that impact the vision of reaching every man, woman, and child in a city.

Novels by the Author:

What happens when a professor figures out how to send messages to his younger self to try and avoid the suicide of his best friend? Did he change more than he bargained for?  Beyond Time

By finding two undelivered letters in a old shack deep in the woods, Cassie and Daniel unknowing set off a series of events which uncover a plot to wipe out a whole family. Hope Remains

Experiencing God in the moments of our lives